Forum menu
I'm not even sure I'm explaining myself properly, but how to attain a portion of my life which is relaxed, cosy and sipping some XO in the warm without something cropping up?
I have a couple of areas of my life that I find completely relaxing - I ride to work 20 miles each way, this is a complete escape as 12 miles of it is on a segregated cycle path across a moor, my mind is free to completely wander.
We also have a caravan on a seasonal pitch 70 miles from home which we go to a lot. When we get there we literally have nothing to do except make food, pour drinks, go for a walk in the woods, go mountain biking, walk to the pub - so just the things we want to do. It's bloody great.
You need somewhere to escape to, whether that's an actual place or an activity doesn't matter.
I have a couple of areas of my life that I find completely relaxing - I ride to work 20 miles each way, this is a complete escape as 12 miles of it is on a segregated cycle path across a moor, my mind is free to completely wander.
This is one of the things I miss about running. Most of my cycling is training on the roads and, for me anyway, it's definitely not as mentally refreshing as running. Running was almost meditative in it's mental refresh quality. Not sure what it is exactly, probably the higher pace and the amount of stuff to think about, you just need to be more mentally engaged in the activity.
Some good stuff in here, not least im not alone. It aopears from the thread that its split into two camps, those that have made a concious decision to slow things down and those that either by default or accidently have let the gas pedal fall to the floor.
By accident today I arrived home early from work and spent some alone time with my daughter (and peppa pig) whilst Mrs K took my son swimming. Queue an hour and a half of cuddles, milk and playing with pajama's - time which money cant buy. It helps to be reminded of these things in a format such as this sometimes.
Time to get meditating daily again also.
My wife and I both had high flying careers - me literally as an airline pilot, and her a city lawyer.
We decided to take a step back, move out of London and both go part time (me 75% roster, she works 2 days a week)
Time for ourselves/kids/each other is precious, and can't be replaced by work success and a bulging bank balance. Have you ever seen an epitaph "I wish I'd worked longer hours"?
I think many of us go through this at times.
My thoughts:
Cycling to & from work is superb, get away from your desk/workspace at lunchtime (running/other exercising can be great), keep a calendar/diary and use it to plan for enjoyable things as well as chores/DIY
-regular time for hobbies/interests should also be in the calendar and your family will know that you do X on a Wednesday evening.
If you want to read books or the like, go to bed earlier. Go to bed earlier anyway.
Unless there is something that you particularly want to see, don't watch TV. Don't waste time on social media (like STW...)
If training for sport is becoming a chore, why do it?
If you are well-paid enough to support the life that you can cope with on reduced hours, reduce the hours.
So many common themes here. I've a very good Civil Service job, that others tell me I'm good at. My wife started her own business back in June with three others, it's going well. The big kick up the bum for us was her breast cancer in 13/14, really changes perspective. We do loads as a family, lots of short trips. Kids do a lot of activities which we alternate the taxi services for, and my lad took up rugby last season, I now referee so I get to see him play and develop and help out at the club. My job is silly busy, but I enjoy it, we have flexitime which I use now and then. Like today for example, time for me to rekindle my MTB riding for a few hours. My wife now works from home 3-4 days a week, which is brilliant for her continuing recovery and with all the family stuff. I've stopped stressing about DIY etc years ago, time is precious. I've got my forms this week to complete for carrying on as a school governor for another 4 years, I moan about it sometimes, but it's very rewarding.
It is about what works for you, as much as I'd love dropping to 4 days a week, it wouldn't be compatible with my job.