[Closed] I can't change a lightbulb, me!

Lovely demonstration of this in OP.

You really think?

"I can't" means "I won't".

I’m at a loss to explain.

Because: Society. Those folk aren't telling you that they're proud not to be able to do something, what they're actually staying is I Trust You. No-one is really chuffed that they can't add up, but folk who say things like this are obeying selection pressures of societal humans to allow them themselves to be not exploited by another member of the tribe when they reveal their own limitations.

We're co-operative animals we all have strengths and weaknesses.

There’s lots of things I can’t do, but equally there’s many things I can do adequately. There are also many things I could do, if I put my mind to it, but frankly can’t be arsed to.
I do have a black belt and I am up to Olympic standard at prevarication.

Why is it that (some) people are (seemingly) proud of being unable to do something?

I’m at a loss to explain.

Can you name all the Kardashian children or sing all the words to "Hit me baby one more time"

If you are unable to do that how do you feel about it?

My wife, who is truly one of the most capable people I've ever met, 'can't do' a lot of things. Very often, these involve some physical effort, getting dirty, are boring, etc. So I do them. And lo; they get done. Without her having to do anything.

Genius. All with the power of her mind...

The one that really gets me is:

“I don’t do maffs”

Usually said with pride. When faced with something like “one hundred plus eighty five” or other such intellectual challenge.

I once said to a fabricator (who had made a terrible job of a steel chute) that "if i wanted it to look as shit as that, i would have made it myself"

Luckily he saw the funny side 😁

A previously hugely overweight chap I know used to say 'I can't cook', used to live on take out food. Also capable of brewing his own beer.
It's a pretty basic skill and what he actually meant was I like take out and can't be arsed to learn how to cook.

"I'm a technophobe."

No, you're just too lazy to learn how to use something new.

"I don't do maths."

Would you be proud of announcing in public that you can't read or write?

I've heard it like almost daily for years. Accountants telling me they don't know anything about Excel, ho ho!

And y'know, it's fine not to understand something. I get that and it's kept me in gainful employ for a degree of time. I don't know how to do may things. I wouldn't look at open heart surgery and think, well, give me a bread knife and I'll have a go.

But to be proud of your ignorance? That's... no, I just don't get it either.

I can't spell. As in, my ability to spell correctly is very very poor. Not proud of it. But proudly admit it as its never stopped me life.

I spell check everything at work but often miss a word or two. People point the incorrect spelling like its a crime and I must have done it on purpose so I react by proudly saying I know my spelling is terrible , I just missed a word or two. They seem shocked when I admit it like it's a forbidden thing to say. Sorry, I didn't memorise how to spell every word.

Also hate when people say "miss-spelled". no I didn't. I aimed to spell it that way and wrote exactly what I aimed to write. Therefor I was right on target. I didn't miss anything. I just spelled it incorrectly.

I am i think a capable human being with many practical skills particularly around DIY, my other half has few of these skills but has the natural ability to find fault in my skills...

"I like things neat and tidy - it's my OCD". No it isn't OCD you twunt you just like tidyness.

I am i think a capable human being with many practical skills particularly around DIY, my other half has few of these skills but has the natural ability to find fault in my skills…

You've just described my girlfriend in the passenger seat.

I've been driving since I passed my test in 1990, she's had a 15 year hiatus before starting again in automatic Up! because she didn't have confidence in anything bigger, yet sees fit to R2-D2 next to me. I know she thinks she's being helpful but I really don't need a co-pilot and in fact her distracting me at the times I most need to concentrate has the opposite effect.

"But you might've gone the wrong way!" she protests. Well, fine, I can turn around, I'd rather go the wrong way than have a running commentary of which lane you think I should be in when you've no better idea than I have.

"I'm rubbish at languages"

(I'll get round to setting aside a couple of lunchtimes to learn a few thousand new words and rules of how to put them together, and practice such that it becomes second nature...)

“I don’t do maffs”

My daughter, when faced with 1.5 sausage rolls in a packed lunch, explained by the fact that there were three sausage rolls to share between two kids, protested: "But.... WHY would you do MATHS if you didn't have to?!" (totally missing the irony of the requirement for actual maths there, but in her defense she is 8).

I am i think a capable human being with many practical skills particularly around DIY, my other half has few of these skills but has the natural ability to find fault in my skills…

Early in our joint DIY careers my mrs and I would regularly have these sorts of conversations where I'd make an arse of something and she'd come along at the end and suck her teeth and say things like "Well, that's not how I would have done it".

Now that she's had more of a chance to make an arse of things under her own steam the frequency of these discussions seems to have dropped right off, strangely enough.

she’d come along at the end and suck her teeth and say things like “Well, that’s not how I would have done it”.

Are we sharing a wife? We must be, but honestly I don't know how she has time for the both of us.

Because: Society. Those folk aren’t telling you that they’re proud not to be able to do something, what they’re actually staying is I Trust You. No-one is really chuffed that they can’t add up, but folk who say things like this are obeying selection pressures of societal humans to allow them themselves to be not exploited by another member of the tribe when they reveal their own limitations.

That's an interesting take, but it doesn't explain the apparent pride aspect (which I've often found baffling, like the OP). They could simply say "I'm afraid I can't do that task, I'll trust you to do X and I can do Y."

Perhaps it's a face-saving strategy? Acknowledging that you're not the best person for the job, while (on some level) swerving the notion that it's some sort of personal fault?

I have to admit I've never really thought about why people do this. I'd always assumed it was because they were morons, but I realise I'm probably being unfair and missing something deeper (username checks out).

Can you name all the Kardashian children or sing all the words to “Hit me baby one more time”

If you are unable to do that how do you feel about it?

Well, that's an interesting riposte.

To which I would reply, I'm fantastically unbothered by it.

However, I'm pretty sure, that if someone made it a condition of my survival, said useless trivia would be retained PDQ.

That’s an interesting take, but it doesn’t explain the apparent pride aspect

Yeah I think that's the nub of my original query. Why the pride?

“I like things neat and tidy – it’s my OCD”. No it isn’t OCD you twunt you just like tidyness.

Yeah, I'm with you on this. OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) is used to describe a range of complex and sometimes quite debilitating, even disabling, conditions that should be respected and better understood. Saying stuff like 'oh I'm a bit OCD when it comes to tidiness' is really quite disrespectful and ignorant. There needs to be much better awareness of this, so thanks for speaking out.

I do know all the words to Hit Me Baby One More Time and am quite proud of the fact...

That’s an interesting take, but it doesn’t explain the apparent pride aspect (which I’ve often found baffling, like the OP).

Pretty much where I was coming from also.

I've definitely seen people proud of it. To quote one memorable instance amongst many, "I don't know anything about this computer shit" delivered with a big grin on her face. That was coming from a woman in Finance with regards to the accounts software she was using, it was akin to a Carpenter boasting that they don't know anything about "this hammer shit." Also, y'know, thanks for calling my career shit, I've only been doing it since I was 12.

Is it pride via some sort of snobbery perhaps? Like, knowing about a given subject is beneath them? Mind you, the woman in the above example was thick as fermented pig slurry so perhaps it's just a variation on Dunning-Kruger.

Eh, who knows. Morons be moronning, must be Thursday.

Morons be moronning, must be Thursday.

Tomorrow I will be sober, and they will still be morons.

Apologies for quote mangling.

Can you name all the Kardashian children or sing all the words to “Hit me baby one more time”

If you are unable to do that how do you feel about it?

I kind of agree with the point being made here. I used to think you needed to know sufficient rudiments of footy, soaps, celeb stuff etc to be able to follow a conversation and feel you had some sort of cultural grasp.

But these days and with increasing social media related atomisation, I just don't have the bandwidth and accept that I've basically turned into a high court judge when it comes to my grip on popular culture. It can be quite isolating but I mean, how was I supposed to know that something wasn't right? This loneliness is killing me, but I must confess I still believe, give me a sign?

(Actually I do know something about the swedish songwriting, evident in the melancholy lyrics and minor key tune, the weird conservatorship etc. And a few kardeshian, kanye, jenner etc ins and outs. It's impossible not to if your ears are half open.)

What you did there.

I see it.

I think those who are proud of their inabilities are just projecting the view that "It's not a bug, it's a feature". Rather than admit to being a failure at something, they need to dress it up as a success - even if they know that person they're talking to may still regard it as a failure, their self esteem is intact because they haven't admitted it to themselves.

Are we sharing a wife? We must be, but honestly I don’t know how she has time for the both of us.

Are we in fact the same person? Have you ever seen us in a room together...?

Interesting subject to raise. Not thought of it before but I’d guess it might be an insecurity thing as opposed to pride. Bluster to cover embarrassment or something like that.