How to introduce my...
 

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[Closed] How to introduce myself to a hottie on my commute?

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Excuse me

Closely followed by

Does this smell like chloroform to you?


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 1:36 pm
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Why can't you just go over and introduce yourself politely? Pay her some compliments like ... nice bike, nice saddle, nice helmet, nice seatpost, nice ... etc ... Just avoid saying nice TT ...

If she does not like it then move on ... it's a probability game.

🙂


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 1:43 pm
 U31
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Just ride alongside her with your man slug out. works like a charm
Trust me, i'm a doctor.


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 1:45 pm
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[i]Just avoid saying nice TT [/i]

is it offensive to mention her top tube?


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 1:47 pm
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is it offensive to mention her top tube?

not as long as you refrain from offering to check the tightness of her bottom bracket..

or the internal diameter of her seat tube..

I'll get my coat.. sorry 😳


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 1:50 pm
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"So, who's your favourite out of Bergerac?"

Works every time.


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 2:09 pm
 hora
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silverpigeon - Member
LOL at this thread. I had a 3 year relationship with somebody I met in exactly the same circumstances about 15 years ago.

I just stopped alongside her one day said 'nice bike' she said 'thanks' I asked her where she'd got it etc, etc.

Two days later she was making me a cup of tea whilst I put a new cassette on for her.

Then we shagged.

Yes 15yrs ago I was still technically a man in the eyes of the law. The vaginal-surgery had nicely heeled and you were my first (considerate) lover.

Thank you 8)


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 4:55 pm
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this has got to be the best thread I've seen on here.

The Strange Sexual Encounters thread does come close though


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 5:19 pm
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Hilarious thread! C'mon Kit get a move on i want to know what you say and which hand she slaps you with when she finds a sudden rush of male cyclists blocking her route to work 😆


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 5:58 pm
 hora
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Ask her if she likes kippers. She'll shout loudly 'what'?

If she mishears she'll never ride down that way again (she probably thought you meant strippers)..

If she heard you she might also like those delightful fishes for breakfast.

Sorted.


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 6:09 pm
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"So, who's your favourite out of Bergerac?"

Works every time.


Love it - I think I'll try this one in future.
So Kit, you have to tell us how you get on. And if you don't get far, there's a guy called geetee in Surrey who's also looking for love. Or a guy named Dave, whichever comes first. As it were


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 7:45 pm
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Dont you just love this thread? I havent laughed so much since i got divorced! I'm in f?cking tears here!


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 8:54 pm
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rohipnol

If it doesn't work use a hammer instead 😉


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 9:16 pm
 Kit
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Oh, if you wear glasses of any sort when you ride your bike, take them off before you talk to her!

Bugger, I might crash into her if I do that? Oh wait... 😀


 
Posted : 31/07/2010 11:58 pm
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Hora - Even if I would. They'd have to be slimmer and better looking than you.

Thank you 8)


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 1:05 am
 rob2
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make sure you rig up a video camera in your room just in case.

I'll get back to my jill dando book.


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 5:18 am
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Have you got a helmet cam you could wear when you meet and introduce yourself.


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 1:59 pm
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My Mum has watched Coronation Street since it's started, what a waste of time.. (seriously, in my eyes) she should have just read this thread

Anyway, this Thread is useless without Pics, both of the OP, and the lady in mind.

It's been going on so long, you'd be classed as a stalker in some countries by now


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 3:22 pm
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My Mum has watched Coronation Street since it's started

Since 1960??

Blimey.

For a bonus point who can name the World's longest running soap opera?

No Googling please.


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 3:35 pm
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The Archers? What do I win?
A lifetime of wondering how to ask out attractive ladies?


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 5:14 pm
 nbt
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[img] [/img]

Ok, the glasses may not be yours, but if you really want to impress the hottie, buy some clippers and get rid of that hair. Or spend money at a nice barbers, but clippers are easier 🙂


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 6:07 pm
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You win a quick fumble with Vicky.
No one said life was fair 🙂


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 6:07 pm
 hora
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Ask her if she knows Simon Barnes.


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 6:15 pm
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The Archers? What do I win?

Well done! You win part of an old Abus lock frame mount that's in the bottom of my bits box I don't know why I've kept it. And a jar of weird pickled cabbage leaves my mum brought round because she thought they looked 'interesting'. Yeah, but what the hell am I supposed to do with them? Maybe you'll think of something. It'll be an exciting prize.


 
Posted : 01/08/2010 6:24 pm
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So Kit, have you done anything yet? Has someone told you who it is off here?


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 1:18 pm
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Stop her and tell her there are over 180 useless entries by 100 different people on this forum, on how you might get to introduce yourself to her.

Give her a bit of paper with the link, ask her to read it, sleep on it and then advise you what to do about this seemingly insurmountable problem.

Either she'll see the funny side, or you won't see her again.


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 2:53 pm
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Or pay me to do the intercept on your behalf!


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 2:58 pm
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Spongebob - the ol' faithful 'I spend loads of time talking on internet forums' opening line, he can't possibly fail with that one!


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 3:02 pm
 Kit
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Sadly I haven't seen her yet this week - mustn't be getting the timing right 🙁 Clearly I'm not lurking long enough in the bushes...


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 4:00 pm
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Or she got the fear and is now commuting via Mars, just to make sure she avoids weirdos like you.

😛


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 4:10 pm
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"Sadly I haven't seen her yet this week"

I bet she lurks here - you blew your cover when you posted. Bet she's reading this now. Write a post about how much fancy her and she might come out of hiding.

Go on!


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 6:18 pm
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Or she might stay in hiding...

[img] [/img]

...for some unknown reason


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 6:47 pm
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So unkind...


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 6:49 pm
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I know. 8)


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 6:51 pm
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 OCB
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Hmm maybe try growing a big beard, and riding a skinny, steel tubed, fully rigid SS in sandals, as a way of drawing attention to yourself, and that way you might be the one being asked questions [i]of[/i], (rather than trying to start something / anything).

If it doesn't work out as planned, or the questions don't go the *right* way ... at least you'll have discovered something about yourself.

😉


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 7:19 pm
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You could try hiding in the bushes with a large balloon, and pop it when she rides past, causing her to crash, then run back to your hidden bike and ride up all nonchalant like and stop and help her up.
Just a thought...


 
Posted : 03/08/2010 9:22 pm
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No updates??

Have any arrests been made yet??

Forum taken down as evidence....


 
Posted : 04/08/2010 9:02 am
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I'd wait until the days draw in a bit and it's a bit darker in the mornings


 
Posted : 04/08/2010 9:17 am
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You need a haircut, better glasses, and a smile...


 
Posted : 04/08/2010 9:32 am
 sas
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Learn to unicycle, dress up as a shark, and hand out flowers and chocolate brownies to everyone you pass. If that doesn't get her attention nothing will.


 
Posted : 04/08/2010 10:35 am
 Kit
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You need a haircut, better glasses, and a smile...

I've already got a sense of humour and massive endowment - a winning combination without the looks 😉


 
Posted : 04/08/2010 12:22 pm
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massive endowment

You are aware of the rules regarding mis-selling of endowment policies aren't you?

I believe that as long as you let the customer know that the policy may under perform then you should be ok.


 
Posted : 04/08/2010 12:38 pm
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Personal Favourite: Ride up next to her on a steep climb, glance down and deliver that immortal line...... "So I'm not the only one who likes to get it into Granny then?"

No need to thank me just get in there and go for it 🙂


 
Posted : 05/08/2010 11:10 am
 U31
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Minds eye, sharp pointy stick interface. Thanks for that.


 
Posted : 05/08/2010 12:40 pm
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So - any update...?


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 7:20 am
 hora
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Is today the last day? If so all or nothing. Combine all the suggestions in one and surely she couldn't refuse such a grand gesture.


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 7:41 am
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i predict no words will be exchanged.....


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 7:43 am
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you boned her in a layby yet?


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 7:49 am
 Kit
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Well, yup, it's my last day at work today. I didn't come across her all week ( 😉 ) and I got the bus to work today.

I might have to get up early and go for morning rides to "chance" upon her. Early bird catches the [s]worm[/s] hottie 🙂


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 8:17 am
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the early worm gets eaten.....


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 8:22 am
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she's probably been reading this thread... 😉


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 8:43 am
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is that it! ive read all six pages to come to this! omg.
i was waiting for a beautiful happy ending!?
learn alesson from me kit,nothing ventured, nothing gained.
get amungst it.fill your boots!
learn from this and stop being shy.


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 12:30 pm
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very disappointing, as she said in her txt


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 12:32 pm
 Pook
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What a let down. You built it up and up, then failed to deliver.

As she said in her second text.


 
Posted : 06/08/2010 12:40 pm
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Shouldn't this have an update and a happily ever after?


 
Posted : 19/08/2010 9:32 pm
 Pogo
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you need to get out more,...all of you!


 
Posted : 19/08/2010 10:13 pm
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Boo. Kit, what girl is this?

I cycle the same path every day (and have occasionally noted you coming the other way). I'm always on the sniff for hot women, but rarely see any. There is one rather tasty brunette girl who always wears sunglasses and seems to have various 10k / marathon t-shirts on. Getting married next year so only up for the eye candy scene really.

In terms of asking her, why not come clean with:

"Hi, hows it going? (wait for reaction) I see you most days on my commute, think you look pretty/nice/hot/fast-on-a-bike, and was wondering if you'd like to go for a drink sometime? (wait for answer, no matter what it is, have your phone number written down to give her)"

... yeah I'm not amazingly great with women either.


 
Posted : 19/08/2010 10:23 pm
 Kit
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Good Lord, is it the car-crash-watching mentality that draws folk back to this thread!

I no longer have a commute (haven't for nearly 2 weeks!) along that path so unless I'm up for some reason I won't be along it again!

Sandy, what do you look like? I tended to ignore most bikers, sorry! The lady in question rides a Spesh Stumpy and is very petite, blonde hair, glasses. Say Hi if you see her 😉


 
Posted : 20/08/2010 12:04 am
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Well you could get up one morning and just hide out and wait for her to pass then follow and as you pass say, Hi havent seen you for a while i have been working away - anything exciting happened on the cycle path lately?

if she ignores you you could follow up with 'suppose a fuc*s out the question then'


 
Posted : 20/08/2010 3:32 am
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This bike path isn't in Ipanema is it?


 
Posted : 20/08/2010 8:38 am
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