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We've looked at some right weird places
* bathroom door lying on the landing. Owner had ripped it off 'during an argument' kthxbye
* conservatory to within 1m of the end of the garden, then a rabbit hutch attached to where the conservatory doors would be so the rabbits can 'come and go' kthxbye
* witch-like owner who'd painted the walls of an otherwise nice house in orange with purple carpets and blue furniture. All curtains closed, lots of voodoo shit and scary paintings on the walls
* central heating piping made into a feature and elaborately routed across ceilings, inside cupboards and out/in through the walls
* afternoon viewing where we had to step over the eldest son's body. He was alive but like comatose
Only really when selling our end terrace in Edinburgh.
First viewings were on Sunday pm. We had told the somewhat batty neighbours we were selling up.
Shared rear patio (not a euphemism..) with a lowish breeze block wall separating.
10am I headed out to dump some stuff, at which point batty old man neighbour starts with a sledgehammer to the shared wall (on *his* property as he later reassured me). Wife goes nuts understandably with viewing about 3 hours away.. children had painted our side of the wall with stuff so they were bawling as well. Came back to scene of carnage, wife still mental screaming at the not very nice neighbour.
Sadly I suspect he knew we couldn't officially complain as then we'd be in dispute with neighbour.. He did tidy it up, to build a bigger wall (it was the privacy he was worried about..) hmm. Would happily thumped him there and then..
Never trust a viewing if the estate agent isn't showing you round. One we viewed we knew where the house was (behind the bushes) but couldn't find our way into the property past the bushes. A second, whilst stood in the lounge downstairs, if you looked up, you were looking directly at the bedroom floor boards and could see into the bedroom through the gaps. Third, accessed via a ridiculously steep & blind gravel track, the wife refused to remain in the car as i drove out (requiring instruction from the owner on how to best negotiate the track). When we did get an estate agent viewing the property had a pond, we had a child, estate agent went on and on about how a child had recently died in a garden pond & that they shouldn't be allowed.
I viewed a repo that had been stripped. I mean totally stripped, the bloke had taken the sockets, skirting (!) switches, carpets and all the bathroom fittings. The estate agents had plumbed in a toilet and two freestanding sink units to make it mortgageable.
(not really a faux pas I know, sorry...)
Looking for a rental room in Oxford. Room had a mattress on the floor and bugger all furniture. Then the (black) agent knocks and says '...and this is the shared lounge' and there's a pile of skinny neo-nazi looking mohican guys, hard at the tinnies about 6:30pm. They were pretty friendly actually...
Oh and the 'room' that turned out to be a converted lean-to that you got to through the garage. I left that one too 🙂
The funniest one we had was when an agent showed us around a house, the main bedroom had the curtains drawn and the bed was unmade. When the EA opened the curtains so we could see the room, we saw a set of handcuffs still attached to the headboard.
The lady who lived there was sheepishly hanging around just out of sight "having a fag", I suspect if we had been there 5 minutes earlier we would have had some explaining to do to the kids 😆
We showed someone round our old house that had a cast iron bath. The prospective owner said he would enjoy throwing a sledge hammer through it.Me and the wife agreed that under no circumstances would we sell the house to him.
Why would you care what a complete stranger did to [i]their[/i] house?
Then there's various rubber items that are revealed when opening up fitted wardrobes.
Are you sure you were viewing a house and not a condominium?
My landlord eventually fitted the removed stuff into his own house (which was of the same era, but had been "modernised" in the 70's.)This was a mint 1920's bathroom. The couple that we sold it to appreciated the original features.
By modernised i mean ruined.
I looked at a small terraced house in Pontywaun that had a huge staircase that the owner had built, it took up so much space that the room it was in was rendered useless for anything. It was for sale for a good few years
^^Bravo Cougar^^ 😆
Tudor beams on the living room ceiling of a tenement flat in Glasgow.
Another tenement flat in Glasgow where the bathroom floor rose up quite dramatically towards the back wall, while the ceiling lowered simultaneously, meaning that only a small child would be able to stand up in the rear third of the room. The estate agent stood at the door with us in silence for a moment while we all took it in before turning round and stating "I have no idea".
Yet another tenement flat in Glasgow, where the large living room had another room contained within it. Picture a room with an immovable shed in it occupying over half the volume. The owner's friend was showing us around. "This is where he likes to do his music" was the only explanation. Despite it being a big room, this lunacy meant you couldn't fit a sofa in it. There was also what we were told was a ship's door between the living room (the outer one) and the kitchen. It was about a foot thick and metal plated. "He keeps setting the kitchen on fire, so thought this was safer" said the friend.
Another flat in Glasgow owned by a woman with about a million cats. The dining room table about twenty places set, all with miniature plates and cutlery and benches on all sides. Really hard to stop s****ing after seeing that.
Nowt as queer as folk.
Not me this one, but a friend went to view a flat on the south side of Glasgow. Thought it was strange that the doorbell was mounted pretty low down, but realised why when the owner was a person of short stature (if that's the accepted nomenclature). The whole house, including the fitted kitchen, was adapted accordingly with nothing above waist height.
Went to look at a place my brother was thinking of buying, the estate agent obviously had something on his mind then near the end suddenly goes "Of course, you'll be wondering about the murders". Wut. "But just to put you at ease, about the murders" Wut. "The same person owned both this flat, and the upstairs flat, and it was actually upstairs the murders happened". Ah that's OK then "Then he hid the bodies in this flat" Wut. "But if you didn't know already, you couldn't tell. They were over there, in the little cupboard. Really good storage in this flat! I don't think we've found them all yet." What, THE OTHER BODIES?
He ended up buying a slightly less murdery place a couple of doors down. Equally cupboardy though so you never know. I mean, it's not like he knew about the other place til the murder-obsessed estate agent started going on about it.
Why would you care what a complete stranger did to their house?
But it wasn't [i]their[/i] house, it was my future wife's house at the time and the other interested party wanted to retain the original features that my wife had spent about 10 years restoring.
Besides he was an objectionable cock who wore stonewashed jeans, a rugby shirt and looked like Bryan (with a Y) Robson.
tend to agree with Harry, it's just being a bit courteous really and engage with the other party -- it may give a clue as to how they'd conduct any negotiation, too.
We bought our end terrace off a nice pleasant couple - no other bidders, was easy enough transaction. When we came to sell, same story - plenty viewers (think many just having a neb, and told us how it was the bumpiest street in Edinburgh - which it was, but...) but only one bidder, nice pleasant couple we're still in contact with...
We were shown round house by the elderly vendor. He initially seemed ok, but then went on to tell us that the only reason the house was on the market was because his wife had done a runner with a waiter they had recently met on holiday, and now wanted to cash in her share of the house.
He casually observed on showing us one of the bedrooms, that this the room he tried to top himself in, ‘when it all became too much’.
He clearly and understandably didn’t want to sell - if this story was his not-so-subtle wat of putting off prospective buyers it certainly worked.
When the EA called for feedback, he didn’t seem too surprised by our experience!
my mate (and yes I know this is a 'my mate' story) but he's a straight up guy.
In his previous house he started digging the garden over as his wife is a keen gardener. Pretty soon he hit metal. Strange...
He dug around it and found more and more metal.
Finally found the edges and it was a car roof. he dug down at the sides and it appeared to be a whole car buried in the garden - I say appeared cos he didn't bother digging the whole thing out. He just showed the wife and they agreed to cover it up again and they ignored it.
They moved.
A pal of mine wanted to buy an old farmhouse from a bloke who seemed strangely reluctant to discuss the selling price. It took a visit by another pal, an experienced and wise solicitor, to work out that the seller wanted to undervalue the sale massively and receive a large part in cash because he had just split with his wife who was supposed to get half.
I was once shown around a house by the owner who was wearing the most ridiculous , ill- fitting toupee ever! Things didn't get off to a good start when i found a massive damp patch he'd tried to hide behind a wardrobe.Then, when we went into the bathroom I touched a tile in the bathroom and dozen tiles fell off the wall.
Needless to say, I didn't make an offer.
Then there was the place in Kennington - the owner explained in his poor English that a condition of the sale was that he would continue to live in the master bedroom until he died! Honest!
Arranged to view a house for the second time to be greeted by the seller and an ambulance outside the house, she was very apologetic about not being able to do the viewing as when she went round to open up found the next door neighbour dead on the lawn!!! he had apparently had a heart attack whilst cutting the grass for her. I still bought it and no I did not haggle !
But it wasn't their house, it was my future wife's house at the time and the other interested party wanted to retain the original features that my wife had spent about 10 years restoring.
that’s ridiculous, why would sentiment get in the way of a business transaction?
i have a thing about kitchen cupboards and low worktops, i’m a 6footer and constantly bang my head on cooker hoods and hate having cupboard doors in my face when i’m using the work surface.
so i don’t care if the new kitchen was hand made and the colour specially chosen by the lovely wife. it’s sledgehammer time if i can't lean over a pan on the hob or wave a knife around above a work top and see what i’m doing.
it’s a house you a buying not a historical monument*
*obviously there are important historical homes out there.
Why would you care what a complete stranger did to their house?
Perhaps because it's a home not a commodity, plus you may like your neighbours & want to remain in contact with them.
So some houses you may care who you sell it to - others less so.
that’s ridiculous, why would sentiment get in the way of a business transaction?
have you dealt with women before?
ooh, another house I viewed in Epsom had a crack around three sides of the upstairs bay window that was so large you could see daylight through it: not around the actual window but the supporting wall beneath it, I kid you not.
Oh that's not a problem said the young female estate agent. Yeah, right.
Not me this one, but a friend went to view a flat on the south side of Glasgow. Thought it was strange that the doorbell was mounted pretty low down, but realised why when the owner was a person of short stature (if that's the accepted nomenclature). The whole house, including the fitted kitchen, was adapted accordingly with nothing above waist height.
That doesn't make any sense, why would he need to ring his own doorbell, surely he'd have a key?
On second thoughts, maybe he fitted it himself and that's as high as he could reach to do so. As you were.
maybe all his friends were...
Once went to see a house in New Mills, Derbyshire, with a working indoor toilet.
Well, I say working, we assume it should be as someone had used it (and left it to fester), but the estate agent just closed the lid and we moved swiftly onto the next room and then quickly out of the house
we didn;t buy it
I;'ll leave the other poo story (and the tales of buying our house) to mrs NBT...
found the next door neighbour dead on the lawn
If I've ever seen an excuse to haggle over the price, that's got to be it.
Mind you, there's an excellent chance you might find my next door neighbour dead on my lawn. Accident, obviously - he was running with scissors, tripped, and accidentally cut his own head off. 😈
I went to look at a flat in Clapham in the late 80's. Over the bed in the main bedroom was hanging a 5' by 7' photo of Maggie Thatcher. Probably an effective method of contraception.
that’s ridiculous, why would sentiment get in the way of a business transaction?
It didn't. I didn't budge on the price because I told the eventual buyer that someone else was interested.
14 inch (I didn't measure it) dildo on the landing floor.
But it wasn't their house, it was my future wife's house at the time and the other interested party wanted to retain the original features that my wife had spent about 10 years restoring.
If you're that bothered about it then you wouldn't be selling, no?
Perhaps because it's a home not a commodity
It's a home until you put it on the market, then it's a commodity; the place you're replacing it with is your home.
Genuine question, is this just me being weird / Aspie? I've lived in the same place, for all practical purposes, all my life. It's my home right now and I've got nigh on 40 years of sentiment here, but if I moved it wouldn't be any more and the new owners could use it as a crackhouse for all I care.
Actually, thinking about it I do understand it from a preservation angle, if there's fittings in there worth protecting. Like, you wouldn't modernise a National Trust property. But if it's 'just' a regular house, it's ultimately down to the owner what they do with it surely?
People have emotions Cougar, I guess you do know that though.
PS Whilst looking for houses I've came across this one... seems like a fairly pleasant conservatory! Though quite tame compared to much of what's been written here, it certainly puts us off going to have a look. [URL= http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v242/glasgowdan/rj_zpsxs5xq0v3.jp g" target="_blank">
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Someone I used to know committed suicide with a circular saw to the neck,her body was discovered by the estate agent showing someone round the place...
When I sold my last house the estate agent wasn't impressed that my road bike was in the downstairs toilet,still it prepared them for my Speccy Enduro in the walk in wardrobe.
Went to look at a place where the EA wouldn't go further than the kitchen. We were under strict instructions not to let the cat out of the living room. Clearly the cat had never left the living room and had never used a litter tray. I can still remember the smell.
Went to a mid morning viewing where the alcoholic couple who owned it were 3 quarters of their way through a bottle of whiskey. The whole house stank of urine. EA told us that the 2 previous viewing he'd been to, they'd both been passed out, naked, on the sofa.
One house we viewed was full of tiger print, every room.
Another viewing from a couple that were getting divorced. It was clearly her choice and he didn't want to.
We were shown in to a bedroom that had a teenage lad asleep on his bed. Thankfully he didn't wake up.
Looking round a place a few years back when Ms Makrie was around 2... I was downstairs in the lounge with the agent when Mrs Makrie (who had been trailing along behind Jr) called from the upper landing with a fake laugh, "Makrie, come and see what Jr's doing!". I (thankfully) left the agent somewhere around the boot room and sprinted up the stairs, house brochure in hand (again, thankfully). My wife snatched said brochure from me and used it to catch the bulk of the poo that Jr was extruding. I cant quite remember what happened after this, but do vaguely recall small pooey handprints needed to be dealt with and a handbag that (apparently) 'had' to be replaced...
My brother was being shown round a house where the owner had recently died, they walked into the living room to find his wake taking place, one of the relatives burst into tears sobbing "this isn't right, this isn't right!"
Needless to say, they didn't buy that one.
You're all doing it wrong. I've viewed and bought one house after the one viewing of my life. Just buy a house you regularly cycle past and nosey at.
I like to minimise the time I spend shopping you see...........
(sorry, no interesting story here)
I agree with you Cougar. I'd care about that sort of thing if it's my house, but once it's sold who gives a shit? Once I have nothing to do with it, it's not up to me what happens, nor do I care. I don't understand why anyone would care to be honest, sentiment or not.
This thread is actually make by me feel somewhat sorry for estate agents.
Which, considering the seething resentment I still bare towards the entire profession after our last moving saga is quite some feat.