Great thread. I had my first finger up the bum (on medical grounds) a couple of years ago due to excessive blood on the paper. Female doc explained it was likely piles but there was one way to be sure, eyeing the examination table. Trousers down, knees to chest, brace... She slipped it up and I just burst out laughing. She said "I've never had that response before" and I spent the rest off the chat giggling away and apologising. Put a proper spring in my step for the rest in the day.
Oh, and I went to see a consultant last year for a lump in my groin. He couldn't feel anything but insisted on a good rummage in the general area. Had to "drop my breeks" in his words and he went at my junk like kneading dough, only his hands were like an XL whereas mine are a Small, which was quite demoralising.
My uncle Vinnie had a touch of bleeding out of his bum, put it down to nobbies and didn’t bother the doctor. Turned out to be cancer and it eventually killed him quite nastily.
Just came on to say similar to above. Bleeding from the bum is not normal, if you get any blood coming out your arse get yersel to the doc. If the bleeding continues keep going back until it's stopped. Bleeding from the bum is a sign of colon/rectal cancer and can be treated well if caught early.
Ask me how I know this as my arse has been sewn up and I shit out my tummy now. 😐
This thread must be the perfect example of comedy and tragedy.
My last next door neighbour who was a quite attractive paramedic told me she was called out to an incident where an old man had got trapped on a toilet seat by somehow trapping his ballsack between the underside of the seat and top of the toilet bowl.
He was pretty calm apparently. I still shudder thinking of the pain.
Bowl Cancer Screening was quite bizarre, 6 people and me (4 female nurses 1 male doctor and a female doctor) all watching a TV displaying the inside my anal passage like it was gogglebox. 😀 For them it was propabably the 30th show of the day !
It's never much fun having any inspections down there.
Since my early 20's i've had
Pilodinal sinus op's x 4
Anal fissures mixed with hemorrhoids.
I had the anal fissures sorted with botox no less! really did the job, would thoroughly recommend pursuing that if you suffer with them. The very amusing side effect of uncontrollable flatulence for a couple of weeks too, good excuse for farting in any case.
I still get the hemorrhoids now, pretty much all the time.
I also get a horrendous pain after passing which lasts for hours, doctors have carried out 3 x unsuccessful colonoscopies, countless finger investigations and a baroscopy where they inflated my colon so they could have a look about and conduct a scan.
None of which have been successful in diagnosing the issue, currently awaiting an appointment to be put under general so they can have a good look.
A pain in the arse is just that! I'm at year 20 of my saga, chin up
Been there, done that.
Neither of us particularly enjoyed the experience, as far as I could tell.
This thread must be the perfect example of comedy and tragedy.
U OK hun?
Double post
Been there, done that.
No T-Shirt ?.
I mean, what is a thread without pictures 😕
"Oh crap, we have run out of small catheters again, well let's use the big ones we have left" said one of the friendly female nurses who came to help with my locked-up bladder after my leg operation.
It is apparently common issue after general anesthesia.
phoned the GP and was told take a picture and send it in… yeah right !
Since lock down and tighter restrictions on F2F appointments, our patients seem to be in a competition to see who can send us the most er..."vivid" picture. When you open some files you really don't want to be 1. having your lunch, or 2 just squinting a bit with a finger hovering over the delete key...
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1. Does the doctor/hospital really need to be informed of a minor case of piles?
2. Does Singletrack Forum " " " " " etc
1. Does the doctor/hospital really need to be informed of a minor case of piles?
Possibly not.
But the first time I had it in my early 20s, I thought the world was ending with the pain and had no idea what it was.
Ever had a bout of Jeremys the morning after a night out and a late night Kebab dripping in hot chilli sauce?
Up there with the worst pain I've ever encountered. Had to sit in a shallow bath that had a dash of dettol in for about half an hour to ensure cleanliness and to soothe the pain.
Heard about a friend of a friend who had bad piles, had to go for an op. After the op he was gently and carefully coming down the stairs at home, farted, which induced horrendous pain that was so severe it made him pass out and he fell the rest of the way down the stairs.
Been examined by the doctor, they can (or used to) be able to prescribe a cream that was far more effective than what you can get off the shelf. Can't remember what it was called but it was sensational stuff.
Doctor told me never have an operation unless things get really bad as the results aren't guaranteed and you can end up worse than before. Managing them through eating habits and lifestyle choices is the best way. Which means not much beer as drinking beer creates extra pressure due to its gassy nature apparently.
Alongside Eraserhead and the Cuckoo's Nest, that Pink Tunnel movie still haunts me. Plus the two crabby old nurses laughing at my bag of pigeon decoys (true story) whilst burning my bacon, I've had a hard paper round.
Doctor told me never have an operation unless things get really bad as the results aren’t guaranteed and you can end up worse than before. Managing them through eating habits and lifestyle choices is the best way. Which means not much beer as drinking beer creates extra pressure due to its gassy nature apparently.
The general statistic is that 1 in 10 patients are harmed in hospital care. Not necessarily through surgery.
https://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/patient-safety
CO2 in beer is removed well before it gets to your bowel... burrrrp. But, it can cause constipation.
