seems to have come round really soon. she has done most of the arrangements... i really should get around to writing a speech.
any sage words of wisdom, or tips for the day?
Dave
Don't.
Run for your life....or get her to sign a contract stating you can ride as much as you did before the wedding then get it framed and hung on the wall.
wise words, listen to Drac
Cull the list of people to ones you actually like - i had to pay for relatives to come and have a free meal and drink and they don't even speak to me when i pass them in the street!
Cancel all plans - do off to a beach and get married there just with a few friends and close family.
+1 Drac, its sound advice.
Good advice from Donk too, your biking won't be affected though.
Get her name right?
Get plenty of sleep in now.
Don't
+1
Find a woman you hate, then buy her a house. Far less hassle than getting married.
[url]
Not that any of you are bitter.
she rides as well, and sometimes nags me to go out riding if i am sat being lazy. honeymoon is 2 weeks biking in scotland.
only 70ish people coming to the wedding, which is on a farm in the peak district. civil ceremony, hog roast, live band, piss up.
Dave
Relax and enjoy it. Assuming of course that she's the one for you, you will have the biggest smile on your face all day. Don't listen to everyone else above; it's kids that stop you riding, not wives!
Other tips?
Don't write your speech the morning of the wedding like I did. Spend the time with friends and family instead
Have a "quiet" stag do the night before. My wife had a meal out with mums and friends. I sat at home on me tod 🙁
If you've got friends/family taking pics/vids make sure you let them know what you want the pics and vids of. Our photographer was a semi-pro family friend on my wife's side. The pics were great, but most of them were her family and friends and not mine.
Relax and enjoy
Enjoy every minute of it, dont let the best man lose the ring, leave the bridesmaids alone!
book a taxi for the end of the night. I forgot, and found out how hard it is to get a taxi, at midnight in Leeds. it gets harder when you have a crying bride and "well wishers" getting involved. Also, for the speech, its easy just follow this simple pattern and you can't go wrong!
1: "my wife and I.... (pause for cheers) would like to thank you all for coming"
2:Doesn't she look beautiful today, plus a little bit about how you met/how you got engaged/ how great she is
3:thank brides family (for paying/for producing hot daughter/ welcoming you into the family etc)
4:Thank your family for your whole life basically
5: thank other people (flowers/cake maker/ musicians/ fire breathers etc)
6:thank best man and ushers, give small gifts (don't give your best man a case of strong bow, he will drink it all and then "have to hang onto the railing so as not to fall off the moon".)
7: thank bridesmaids "don't they all look beautiful" etc. give small gift.
8: make any announcements (bar times/pills for sale/single friends etc)
and you're done. Forced jokes are crap, ad lib is best and don't write it all down and then read from it. if you must write stuff down, just put titles and ad lib around them!
have a good un, it won't be the best day of your life, its long, tiring and expensive. the best day comes about 3 days later when you've relaxed and are lying on a beech somewhere hot!
DONT=2
So many cynics.
I got married a year ago and it was a brilliant day
Don't worry about the speech there are plenty of good ideas for speeches on the internet use a couple but include plenty of funny personal stuff about how you met etc! The pressure is on the best man to deliver the funny speech so the grooms is easy.
Any technical / logistic / organisational difficulties let your best man / ushers deal with.
Relax and remember to enjoy it
[i]So many cynics.
I got married a year ago and it was a brilliant day[/i]
Hahahah! That's why your not.
"Not that any of you are bitter."
Or maybe realistic?
So many cynics.I got married a year ago and it was a brilliant day
Give it time 😉
Wow, lotsa bitter divorcees about?
Where are the happy marrieds?
[i]Wow, lotsa bitter divorcees about?[/i]
Hey! I'm not divorced.
[i]Where are the happy marrieds? [/i]
Precisely.
Or maybe realistic?
What, that you're going to end up hating the person you've married having sunk a considerable amount of money into a joint posession? That marriage is basically sh1t?
I think the ones being "realistic" as you say have been bitten by someone they shouldn't have married and are giving their jaded opinion. Marriage works for many people, or is that being "unrealistic"?
Wow. Talk about pissing on someones parade from a great height.
Advice (I've not done it but been bridesmaid to many, yes joke is true, whatever):
Drink but in moderation. You'll want to remember.
Plan an extra 20 mins for getting to the church, something always goes wrong.
Get the bridesmaids to iron your shirt if you're not going to.
Friends have said it was the little things they remembered. They're OH's wrote secret post it notes and left them under plates on the top table, left notes all over the room they were staying in, left daft gifts under pillows.
Go to the pub with some really close mates the night before but don't get a hangover.
Try and relax.
Make some time, even if it's only 10 minutes, to go for a walk with her and no one else.
It's knackering and you're on your feet a lot. Wear comfy shoes.
Your wedding sounds brilliant, frankly, just relax and for gods sake remember to say thank you for all the planning she has done. And mean it. It will have been one of the most stressful things she's ever done, I'd guess.
Drac - why the bitterness?
+1 for Kit - marriage clearly works for some.
I'm busy getting unmarried, but I don't think that was inevitable. Loulouk speaks much truth. 🙂
One bit of advice that I forgot to take was dont drink too much before your speech!!.
I had one glass of bubbly too many and when I got my notes out of my pocket I was struggling to read them, had to down a few pints of water, and luckily I had the speech pretty much memorized.
So another tip, Practice your speech, lots!! Think mine went down quite well, or so everyone said, lots of laughs and a few people in tears at the slushy bits.
I had lived with my wife for 9 years before we got married and said "we have lived together for a long time now, but I need to tell you I havnt married the woman I want to live with, I have married the woman I cant live without". This line went down very well!!
What makes you think I'm serious?
No bitterness here...
Not happily married, but happily co-habbit
Contract over who owns what!
And ignore the posts above saying run for your life.
Better off cycling...its faster!
Congrats btw!
Is she fit? kidding.
Speech - don't take too long or insult anyone too much. Make it snappy and class.
"we have lived together for a long time now, but I need to tell you I havnt married the woman I want to live with, I have married the woman I cant live without"
I hope the bride was wearing waterpoof mascara 😉 That's possibly one of the sweetest things I've ever read.
Oh, one more thing, eat something. Yes, nerves, yes, queasy. Fainting groom worse, however, so tell your best man to carry some oat bars or something. Unless you've managed a full english, at which point this point is irrelevant. 🙂
My first response was going to be Don't - but that was just for comedy effect and to join in with the joke.
My wedding day was almost 20 years ago and it was great. Some wise words above re enjoying the day and keeping the speeches simple. If there is only one piece of advice I can offer you for the day it is to relax, enjoy the day and take in as much of it as you can. Yes it is a long day but boy it flies by! If you are not careful you will miss out on spending some time talking to / meeting friends and family who have made the effort to come. And try and make sure you can get the friends and relatives to send you a copy of pics they took as they will help capture all of those moments that you didn't see. One wedding we went to recently provided a pile of instant cameras at the reception. Let people take photos and then you know you have at least a record from different peoples perspective of the event. Worked well.
Have a great day - and a long and happy marriage!
Drac - Member
What makes you think I'm serious?
It's not exactly hilarious otherwise. Oh hang on...
Try to avoid the opening words "this isn't the first time I've got up from a warm seat with a piece of paper in my hands". I was quite up for using that but glad I avoided it. Not sure everyone would have s****ed at my rather infantile sense of humour!
Otherwise go with the other wise positive words and relax and enjoy the day!
Happily married here. It all hinges on you finding the right partner.. I was sure of it and I just spent the entire day grinning like a loonie uncontrollably 🙂 But +1 for relax. You're there with family to get hitched. **** all the flowers, guest problems, speech protocol and the rest - it's not important. You and your loved ones are.
People go on about wanting the day to be perfect so they stress about crap - well to be honest, if any day needs massively expensive flowers, a coach and horses and tons of stress about family to be perfect, then.. well.. that's clearly bollokcs.
Where are the happy marrieds?
waves.
Ok on a serious note.
Happily married it was a great day and now have 2 lovely kids. It does change things anyone who says it don't is lying, it may be small but it does change things.
Tips:
Well most is covered but I'll go with the disposable cameras tip, we put loads scattered around for people to use and got a nice varied amount of pics from all through the day and night.
Relax it'll work out no matter what trivial things get in the way.
Would I do it again if I was to seperate from the Mrs? God no!
Thanks for the tips guys; I'm used to everyone giving the standard respons of 'run' or 'don't'... so much so that I normally pre-empt it when talking about the wedding.
relaxing: I plan to. I don't really get stressed, so most of the day will be spent with me chilled out and her fretting. I've tasked the bridesmaids with calming her down before-hand, and I'll take over the job once hitched.
speech: cheers for the tips, some useful lines there. I will most likely adlib it, but a few preprepared phrases and headings is a good plan.
right partner?: we've been together for over 7 years now, including travelling for a year together and living together for 5 years - owned a house together for 3.5 years.... i'm pretty sure she's right for me!
photos: we're taking a laptop and card reader with us, and we're going to harvest everyone's pictures in the morning.
Really looking forward to it; it's going to be a whole weekend long party:
friday night family buffet.
saturday afternoon wedding, followed by cake and champagne, then a hog roast and band in the evening.
sunday big breakfast and a pub lunch with as many people as are still around, then a hot tub and champagne for me and the missus when the sun goes down.
Dave
Was going to give my tuppence worth but I think all I would say has been covered by the above so just enjoy your day, and best wishes to the both of you.
[i]Thanks for the tips guys; I'm used to everyone giving the standard respons of 'run' or 'don't'... so much so that I normally pre-empt it when talking about the wedding.[/i]
Yup a standard running joke but some seem to miss it.
I'd echo the advice to have a quiet night the night before. It's not worth the grief of either turning up still drunk or with a howling hangover, or worse not turning up at all because you wake up a) tied to a lamppost b) in A&E or c) in a lifeboat of a ship bound for Yokohama.
Get to the wedding venue early enough to have a small stiffener. If my experience was anything to go by, the G&T I had before kick off & the glass of champagne immediately following were about the only things I got to drink until after my speech.
Practice the speech. Try not to put anything contentious in it, but remember to thank the bride/bride's family/bridesmaids/best man/ushers.
Enjoy it.
Andy
meehaja's advice is good.
Your wedding sounds like a good-un - farm in the peak district. civil ceremony, hog roast, live band, piss up. Have you got your ale lined up? If not give Thornbridge a bell ( http://www.thornbridgebrewery.co.uk).
Best wishes for the day.
scuttler... ale is all coming from bad ram brewery and lager from freedom beer.
You should have a few nerves on the day, I think its a good indication that you really care about what your doing.
I tried not to do too much of the thanking thing as 1. Its boring 2. Saying the bridesmaids etc look fantastic is all a bit predictable.
Are you going away on honeymoon straight away or the next day? If not think of some thing nice you can do the next day, we booked in to a very nice country hotel and escaped from the world for a couple of days. Just gone home the next day to our house would have been a big anti climax.
