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- this one only works if you say it 🙂Fruit flys like bananas, time flies like the wind
Recent research has proved that 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy.
I've just got a new job in a cardboard box factory. I'm making a packet.
Frank Skinner classic....
He did a show at a Gay Women's group type convention where obviously there was a strong representation of the lesbian community present.
He did his normal routine 😉 to almost complete silence. At the end in the foyer he was approached by two rather butch looking ladies who started to berate their disgust at his material.. " I am so disgusted with you small minded and bigoted material,It is vergin' on the offensive"
To which Frank skinnier replied " There's only one virgin on the offensive here love".
From the one liner king 😆
Cant remember his name, Canadian guy on Micheal Macintyre's road show...
[b]
"When god created me he said I can have either a long memory or a long penis...I can never remember which one I chose".[/b]
We had an apprentice once, lazy little git, but quite a character.
He was de-burring some parts once, with another apprentice.
Jokingly I feigned anger & asked if that was all he had done, he replied...
"No, he's done them, I haven't done any".
Harry Hill:
"It's funny that they make glue out of horses. They're not at all sticky"
Cotic
I went to a zoo the other day, all they had was one dog. It was a Shih Tzu.
Did you hear about the magic tractor? It turned into a field.
I never apologise, I'm sorry, that's just the way I am.
Always borrow money from a pesemist. They'll never expect it back.
I once had a dog called Minton who ate Shuttlecocks........bad Minton!
[i]Horse walks into a pub. barman says "why the long face" [/i]
that's not a one-liner, merely the first line of a two-liner.
"Jus' 'cos I look like a fool, and jus' 'cos I act like a fool, don't be fooled, I am a fool!", Groucho.
Horse walks into a pub. barman says "why the long face"that's not a one-liner, merely the first line of a two-liner.
No, that's a 2-liner on one line! 😉
How about,"9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape"