Dilated - The outcome of combined actions between a pissed up chauffeur and over eager paparazzi photographers.

Principals : The Duke of Edinburgh’s former military contacts who had absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with Dilation.

Scandinavian: Norwegian bar-code system for checking in military ships.

Arachnophobia: scared of spiders in the middle east

illegal: sick bird

tea towel: common bird in the kitchen

Lycan - swear box for the untruths

Fortune - the fettling before a fine tune

Contemplate - blueprint for fake crimes

Euphonium - delegation of communication responsibility between two Wurzels

Eukaryote - to encourage a Wurzel to visit the off licence

Transcendence - social activity involving mind altering drugs and a night club.

Graphic Equaliser: the episode where Edward Woodward gets wood

Constable. Where Piers Morgan keeps his horses.

Function - to dismiss, sassily

Lieutenant: when you’ve waited so long outside to toilets you start to wonder whether the occupant has taken up permanent residency. See ‘squatters rights’.

Lollipop. To burst out laughing

Trans-fats: a version of liposuction that involves both a donor and a recipient.

Torrent - land access charge levied by the grockle farmers of the South West.

Grockle farmer - not strictly within the spirit of the Fictionary but it's person or business that seeks to maximise the value of extracted from tourists or incomers.

Television - to inform the first woman she was electric

Flytipping - giving advice on the move, normally done whilst running.

Occasionally also:

Flytipping - when a flashmob leaves a donation for any inconvenience caused.

FAR - frequently applied response, lazy recycling of answers to FAQ. More recently evolved into the off the peg essay market.

Television: A person from Tel Aviv

Sharkbait - skis selected for dubious cover, when snow sharks are expected. Not intentionally the newest ones in the quiver.

Dog - A backwards God

Resurrection - The sexual excitement you get from reviving a ten months old thread

Insurrection - Kneeing a molester
Absolute Legend - The tip of a Hero's big toe

Legend - your foot.

Legend – You're Hip

Irish: a bit angry

Singletrack World: International storage solutions for the sleeveless undergarment.

Pharmacology: a bit like Agricultural University.

Irish: a bit angry

I mean, there's "not reading the entire thread" but that's literally the third entry in the OP...!

Insurmountable: the next evolution of gentleman's wearable technology

Vanish: A bit like a van.

Spanish: About the width of a hand.

Bladderwrack: urine storage device storage device.

Endogamy: the abuse of small quadrupeds
Conflagration: post-Brexit
Regicide: death of a Kray
Borax: what's required in Downing Street (abbr)
Consanguineous: first prize in the prison choral contest
Gastroenteritis: unhappy about going into a posh bistro

I mean, there’s “not reading the entire thread” but that’s literally the third entry in the OP…!

Arse biscuits. I’d literally thought of that by myself. 😭

Myth - A female Moth

Sarchasm: the yawning gap between those that get it and those that don't.