[Closed] Charging kids 'rent'

Part of growing up innit. I thought they taught financial capapbility these days? Whether you save it for her or spend it on caviar to gorge on while she's picking at her mealy grubs and cous cous you're doing her the favour of knowing what stuff costs.

The range of attitudes on here is very interesting. Personally I would never charge my kids rent and would give them everything I had. But that is my choice, you all stick to your own choices.

Never charged them "rent" as such but once out of education & earning made sure they contributed to their share of bills etc by charging them a weekly amount - single parent but well enough paid to help them out when necessary now they have moved out, but then again I've always liked to teach them financial independence from an early age - used to give them the child benefit but they had to but their own clothes for example - soon weaned them off expensive trainers 😉

you all stick to your own choices

We will, thanks.

The range of attitudes on here is very interesting

Yes, there is a polarisation, but the vast majority are saying "charge board" and I'd completely agree.

My eldest is an apprentice, he gets charged £140 per month to live at home.
Mrs E-T and I are both in good jobs, so we certainly don't NEED the money but he certainly NEEDED to take responsibility for his own cash flow, savings and general budget management.
If he wants a car or mobile, then that's for him to fund. Bank of dad does make interest free loans to help him avoid interest charges on car insurance or big purchases, but he needs to explain his business case for each, demonstrating that he's considered how much interest he's avoiding paying and that he can afford the repayments he proposes.

He might get some or all of his "board" back as a lump sum when he buys a house, and for which he is thankfully starting to plan... But he doesn't know that yet and it'll be entirely dependent on how far he cooperates with the smooth running of the household between now and then.

Like most things it's all dependent asking a vauge" would you charge" will give you most peoples answer.

For most its a case of your offspring earnnig and being at home when you still have a considerable mortgauge and household bills etc a contribution to the household woud be a normal thing. it's not like your asking them to pay it all!

I do know of instances where offspring have paid nothing to parents but spent freely on hlidays and must haves while the parents not nessasarily suffer but certaily dont have a "money worry" free time.

It was called "dig money" when I was growing up.

When studying I got a free ride, when working I paid dig money. Seemed completely fair at the time and entirely the norm.

Are [s]children[/s] young adults these days unique special flowers now that can't contribute some of their earnings to the family houshold?

the [b]vast majority are saying "charge board"[/b] and I'd completely agree.

[i] Personally I would never charge my kids rent and would give them everything I had.[/i]

Will you adopt me?

No, dont charge her rent yet. Tell her however to enjoy the money because when she becomes, in the eyes of the law, an adult at 18 she will have to. It should be proportionate to her take home obviously. I was very fortunate with my parents and due to being in full time education, having a part time job that paid next to nothing and living at home til 21 I paid no rent as a teenager until I moved back in at 25. Then I paid a solid £200 a month regardless of my take home and was more than happy to do so. It barely covered my share of food, water and electricity!

I believe kids need a bit of freedom with money to learn the value of it however paying bills is just that. How do they think they will live outside the family home? Its not the amount, its the principal. I have mates who have to pay a considerable amount of rent due to their parents struggling with bills and that is an unfortunate situation. Once they live out once it will change their view of money.

I also believe being open with your kids is sensible. My mum is more than happy to talk finances but my dad is against my brother and I knowing how much they earn, how much the bills are etc. Even now at 28 and living on my own he wont discuss anything financial! I think if shes sensible, sit her down with a break down of the bills. Once she knows how much things actually cost she may be more willing to give up her hard earned money to help out.

Does this validate you then?

Eh?
You suggested that the "range" was interesting.
I suggested that the weighting of the distribution within that range was significant too.

I wouldn't charge anything until graduated. If at home after that then must contribute even if not earning - though the amount would just cover food/energy costs if no income. If earning then like the idea of some rent but giving that back to help with a property deposit.

What happens if they want a 'friend' round?!!

For this reason alone I can't get my head round why any normal teen or 20'something would want to live with their parents.

Abit Peter Pan'ish at best. Weird. A couple of houses on our street have 20'somethings living with their parents. I view them as abit weird. Forget the 'I'm saving for my deposit' stuff. I rented and saved.

When I lived at home (nearly 30 years ago) we contributed the same for when working as if signed-on. I was earning £100pw and my brother £21pw dole. We both paid £10pw.

"Work pays", was the message.

My folks didn't need the money BTW.

I've 3 kids and have treated them all differently, because they are different. The eldest two work, with one doing an apprenticeship away from home and not actually earning enough money to live (we and my ex-wife help him out). The older one has a house and is fine.

My youngest is still at school.

Different though if you need the money.

Wow!

Loads of replies!!

OK, after sleeping on it she has decided that some contribution does seem to make sense! This was only ever to be while she has full time hours, income of about £200 per week!

September, when college resumes, or if she doesn't earn in a week due to other commitments, nothing to pay!

As far as the money is concerned, yes, it will help! We are not in a great place, but can survive without it. And, to be fair, it will probably only cover the cost in fuel of taking her to and from work when there are no busses, and going to check out what uni she's going to in 2015!

And if she didn't pay, she would just get the latest iPhone she wants (@£600!) quicker....

Was never charged, but I left when I was 19 and never really went back.

Would I charge my daughter when she's that age? I don't know, but I do know I'll give her a better financial education than I received.

Even now at 28 and living on my own he wont discuss anything financial!

My dad is very open with his finances. He tells me how much he's in debt, and then asks if I can afford to bail him out if the worst happens 😯

My dad was delighted to tell me how his pensions amount to more than my wage 😕

Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese, Malaysian and Filipino kids are ridiculously hard working.

They also never ever pay rent to their parents and if they have to, their parents consider themselves to have failed their children.

Funny that. Maybe youngsters work hard and follow your lead if they actually respect you, as opposed to having to learn about "reality" whatever that is. The reality is probably more that your children are going to have to pay for all the aging old ****s in this country and helping them to move out as opposed to reducing their earnings might actually be far better in terms of your own interests when you need money at 75 for a medical treatment that is no longer covered by the NHS (if it exists).

There's your answer - move to the Philipines

For this reason alone I can't get my head round why any normal teen or 20'something would want to live with their parents.

This. Maybe some losers don't want to but the only thing stopping most 19 year olds moving out is cost.

I'd rather I subsidised (for a set amount of time) my kids to leave the house so they learnt to stand on their own two feet. That's much harder than covering 200 quid of rent a month and having your mum/dad still cooking you family meals.

Surely if they're still students living at home during the holidays is normal?

At the end of my first year at university I needed about 200 more quid to get me through 1 month, until I got my first paycheck from a new job. My room was paid for, for the next couple of months.

Asked parents for money, the answer was "We're not giving you money to doss around at uni for the summer, we've got a job for you here and you can pay us rent".

Idiots.

Then they complained about me coming back each summer and mooching off them. Oh the hilarity.

Depends on the child at this age. If you think she'd benefit from a life lesson on ecconomics then charge her, if you think she's going to piss all the money away before getting to uni then charge her.

If she is sensible then let her have the luxury of her money. 🙂

In general, I'd say charge her.

Spare the rod, spoil the child.^^

When I was on the child side of this equation I had to pay board as soon as I stopped being eligible for child benefit. Never got any of it back.

I think what I will do when mine are old enough is charge it, either on a %age of income basis, or on an extra costs incurred (ie extra food required, no council tax discount) basis. Then when they leave home at say 24 or 25 I will give them the opportunity to win it back if they can beat me in an olympic triathlon. Hopefully this will give them a sense of responsibility rather than a "right" to things, and a love for exercise in their 20's

I went to Uni a month after I turned 18 and haven't really lived at home since.

However, if I ever needed to live back with parents for whatever reason I would certainly offer to pay towards the upkeep of the house. I'm now 31 though so not exactly 'young'!

I offered to pay my way when I moved back home after finishing Uni and getting a full time job. Parents did not force me or give hints, I just thought it was the correct thing to do.

My older brother who was also living at home was proper annoyed as he was forced to pay his way too ...

Horribly capitalist idea.
At what point did children file an application asking to be born?
Oh that's right, never.
Look after them like you're supposed to instead of acting like government in the house.

I pay £150 a month not (alot i know) but i also buy 90% of food and drink for 4 adults and take my parents out for a meal once a month. I worked out id be better off in my own place but I havnt got a deposit yet.

6079smithw - Member

Horribly capitalist idea.
At what point did children file an application asking to be born?
Oh that's right, never.
Look after them like you're supposed to instead of acting like government in the house.

I think most 16/17 year olds will class themselves as young adults and want to be treated as such. If they are over 18 they are an adult (though they never stop being somones child) and working working then the goverment is taxing them and giving them the chance to vote (or not if they can't be arsed).

I certainly wouldnt call it a horribly capatalist idea - my dad used to give all his wages to his mum in the 60's and she gave hm back a few shillings from his £7 weekly wage - Disgusting. Even worse my parents paid for and bough my garndparents house for them before even ebing able to afford their own place (all maggies fault!) how outragous of may grandparents to accept that!

I pay £150 a month not (alot i know) but i also buy 90% of food and drink for 4 adults and take my parents out for a meal once a month. I worked out id be better off in my own place but I havnt got a deposit yet.

Which is keeping you helpless and unable to move out and on with your life.

Well done to your parents. If they skipped on a few months of rent you'd have enough for a deposit on a room in no time and then you'd be out of their hair permanently.

So many parents appear to cut their noses off to spite their faces.

Although, maybe I'm just a c-word.

Look after them like you're supposed to instead of acting like government in the house.

I'd best ring my dad - see if he fancies covering all my household outgoings. I'm 36...

We never charged any of ours rent/housekeeping. We stopped giving them an allowance/pocket money quite early and they kept what they earnt. Our middle daughter worked hard to save £5k for 2 major travel trips, inc full time for 6 months but as she was saving we didn't ask for anything from her.

With 3 kinds who went to Uni charging them housekeeping is a bit pointless when they will need help to get through Uni. We always paid their mobile phone contracts as with daughters we saw it as a safety measure, the tried PAYG for a very brief while and they would end up out on a Sat night with no credit, as a parent you wouldn't forgive yourself if something happened to them and they didn't have the money for a call.

OP if its a temporary summer job I would just have a word and see that some is saved, otherwise I'd use the housekeeping as suggested above, you keep it then give it back at some stage in the future.

no teenager/ young adult is ever going to be happy about having to suddenly pay for what they have had for free all their life.
It is a tough and unpleasant life lesson to be learnt. They either learn it at your hand or the hand of a landlord.

I dont think i would have someone on FT wages paying nothing unless they were saving for Uni or some such personally.
Even they you are still subbing them

Horribly capitalist idea.

At what point did children file an application asking to be born?
Oh that's right, never.

Look after them like you're supposed to instead of acting like government in the house.

as a parent you wouldn't forgive yourself if something happened to them and they didn't have the money for a call.

Its a tough call either way IMHO

I would never charge my only kid to stay with me coz she already grown up, everyday is a gift to be with her. I would however ask that whatever she saved by staying home to keep it in a separate account for a rainy day.

I always make sure to her that the word HOME is a place where you are free from all shitty things happening in life .

In '86 when I was 16 and got my first job (£56 a week) I paid £15 a week in board ,this amount didn't change but my mum booted me out a week before my 17th birthday as she was getting re-married and didn't think me and her new husband would get on living together!
I got a council flat and lived either on my own or with a mate for the next 18 months until my excesses with my first credit card caught up with me.
At this point my step dad suggested I could move back in with them but I pay my way ,paying my way meant I paid 25% of everything except the mortgage.During the summer months this would be about £150 a month rising to around £230 in the winter months ,I was earning about £120 a week at my normal job but had a part time pub job that paid back all the debt I'd accumulated. I didn't get any cash back from the rent/board but didn't expect to.
I only lived with them for 8 months during which time I paid back nearly £4000 (not much but it felt like it was) before getting my first mortgage just before my 20th birthday. My mum gave me £1000 as an early 21st birthday present towards the deposit on our house.
IMO charging your kids board isn't out of order ,it gives them some sort of idea about how much running a house really costs. If you can afford to bank it to give them when they move out then thats lovely but if not it shouldn't be an issue.

I always make sure to her that the word HOME is a place where you are free from all shitty things happening in life

My view entirely. I don't understand this idea that kids are only entitled to live in the family home until they start earning and then they have to pay for the privilege. As far as I'm concerned the family home is and will always be available to live in with no conditions attached. Some people have some funny ideas about family and money.

Squeeze them till the pips squeak.

And change the locks.

Squeeze them till the pips squeak.

Or don't have kids in the first place?

As far as I'm concerned the family home is and will always be available to live in with no conditions attached.

So if they have an income you wouldn't want them to contribute? No income/age limit? I got my own place as soon as I could afford to anyway.

I don't understand this idea that kids are only entitled to live in the family home until they start earning and then they have to pay for the privilege.

I don't understand this idea that adults shouldn't behave as adults. I advocate a socialist approach - from each according to his ability, to each according to his need.

[i] I don't understand this idea that kids are only entitled to live in the family home until they start earning and then they have to pay for the privilege[/i]

What if your kids were say 26 and earning more than you. Wouldn't you expect them to contribute to the running costs of the household?

So if they have an income you wouldn't want them to contribute? No income/age limit? I got my own place as soon as I could afford to anyway.

It would be up to them. I wouldn't refuse a contribution, but neither would I insist on one. Like I said, no conditions attached. Of course this goes with the assumption that I don't need the money. If you do, it's a different situation altogether.