MegaSack DRAW - This year's winner is user - rgwb
We will be in touch
I've been personally very moved by the significant and senseless loss of life in the past week. I don't feel there's much I can do except offer my respects to those who have passed away before their time.
Please keep any disrespectful comments off this thread.
RIP Stepping Hill Hospital murder victims
RIP Norwegian terror victims
RIP Chinese rail crash victims
RIP Amy Winehouse
RIP Texas ice rink victims
RIP East Africa famine victims
Feel free to add your condolences, if you wish.
Kit plus 1
RIP Volga River Disaster
RIP Bangladesh truck accident
Much sadness around at the moment.....
No you can't have an RIP thread without the BS on STW. It is an absolute certainty that there will always be a small minority who lack the maturity, good manners, and respect, to avoid that happening.
*sigh* 🙁
Ernie, was your post really necessary or in the spirit of the thread? That's a rhetorical question; please don't answer it.
Technically, nobody's been murdered at Step-in-ill-Step-out-dead although if that idiot security nazi gets in my way tomorrow as I pedal through the grounds of it again, inevitabley late for work, one of us might be 🙂
Sorry, carry on.
Oh sorry Kit, what were you expecting from this thread - a long list of multiple deaths which have occurred over the last week ? I don't mind if you answer that question.
I was hoping that forum users would exercise some respect and self-regulation to remember the passing of so many lives without the antagonism that pervades other topics on STW.
I was hoping that forum users would exercise some respect and self-regulation to remember the passing of so many lives without the antagonism that pervades other topics on STW.
Great idea. Let's also have a special thread to offer congratulations to all the parents of new-born babies in the world this week, one to wish a quick recovery to everyone with a nasty head cold etc etc etc.
Good grief.
It's the internet, the device that allows people to paint a thin veneer over what they would never say in public compared to what they feel the need to say anonymously by hiding behind a username and fake persona.
Also this is the Singletrack forum is it not? Top Gear's on tonight and the haters will be back out.......normal service will resume shortly
RIP Top Gear (2008)
Changed mind, not the place.
Cant beat the opportunity for a bit of vicarious grief.
Perhaps we should read the names of the previous day's dead each morning before starting "what tyre" threads. Its the only decent thing.
Can we have an RIP thread without the BS please?
The simple answer is no. I echo your sentiments but this is not the platform for expressing them. It's one thing to use the deaths of others as a tool for introversion, professing it on a largely anonymous forum is asking for trouble. This thread [b]will[/b] degenerate into a debate about grief athletes which I suspect is the opposite if what you want. If I was you I'd ask the mods to pull this thread before the spiral gathers pace....
Agree with Yoss.
And there is no way that the death of a junkie should be compared to some thing like Norway or Africa.
Over 1,000,000 people died world-wide last week. If you're going to express your condolences for people you don't know you should be thorough. You'd better get started if you're going to keep on top of it.
Perhaps we should read the names of the previous day's dead each morning before starting "what tyre" threads. Its the only decent thing.
Hear hear.
What's the point in an RIP thread anyway? Forum threads are about discussion, that's the point of their existance. If you're moved by something or want to stop and think about it - do. It is a sad time (though I don't think statistically any different to any other time) but that doesn't mean a forum needs to be asked to consider it quietly while reading your post.
I was hoping that forum users would exercise some respect and self-regulation to remember the passing of so many lives without the antagonism that pervades other topics on STW.
so would I but then I also frequent STW and realise the likely hood of this occuring is very slim.
Not sure we need to morn every passing Stoner but I think the OP is more asking that people dont say they dont care that someone has died or call them a waste of skin for example..this is not the same thing.
My work colleagues dad died last week I was utterly unaffected by this news personally but I did not say this to them when they told me and tell them about the great weekend I had riding.
On here I dont like cars or watches or top gear but I dont go on these threads to explain why I dont rate them and pour scorn on those who do I just avoid reading them.
I dont expect any of this to actually happen on here though but agree with the OP in general.
My work colleagues dad died last week I was utterly unaffected by this news personally but I did not say this to them when they told me and tell them about the great weekend I had riding.
On here I dont like cars or watches or top gear but I dont go on these threads to explain why I dont rate them and pour scorn on those who do I just avoid reading them.
I suspect it's because your work mate didn't come in and gather everyone around and say "My Dad died" and then expect everyone to either ignore that info or make pleasantries. Normally when people are moved by sad things they keep it to themselves unless asked.
Bringing attention to the deaths of people you don't even know and then expecting everyone to take note and sit solemnly is stupid, most people won't care (not calously, just because they have no way of knowing them and no way of putting it in context) and have enough issues of their own to deal with.
It begs the question why you'd post it in the first place. Do you assume everyone has no natural empathy and needs attention bringing to it? Are you the guardian of careful quiet thought? Jesus, posting it here is like saying it in a pub. Do you honestly expect everyone to stop and think, or do you expect them to take another pint and laugh in your face?
I suspect if someone said their dad had died nobody would say the didn't care. Saying someone you didn't know died is something completely different.
I find it quite refreshing that some STWers don't feel bound by "never speak ill of the dead" and some go as far as "good riddance to bad rubbish".
I found all of this week's headline deaths sad but if Lance Armstrong or Tony Blair die before me I'm celebrating.
I found all of this week's headline deaths sad but if Lance Armstrong or Tony Blair die before me I'm celebrating.
That is quite an odd hate list you have there.
It's not that particular thread, it's a small but very vocal number of people who seem to spend 23hrs a day on the forum commenting on each and every bloody post, regardless of if they have anything useful to contribute.
Personally I couldn't give a stuff about Amy but I just ignore the thread. Unfortunately, there are others who just have to stick their oar in, the same goes for loads of other threads. It's basically just trolling and occasionally it drops into very poor taste.
Normally when people are moved by sad things they keep it to themselves unless asked.
Eh you sure about that"hiya how are you" Fine or crap my dad died which is more likely ? Hiya nice weekend? - Yes fine or no my dad died etc - you would not tell people if this happened?
I suspect if someone said their dad had died nobody would say the didn't care. Saying someone you didn't know died is something completely different.
I did not know their dad why would I - it is the same thing
That is quite an odd hate list you have there.
+1
Really, 5thElephant? Would adding Clarkson make it less odd?
Personally I couldn't give a stuff about Amy but I just ignore the thread. Unfortunately, there are others who just have to stick their oar in, the same goes for loads of other threads.
Same could be said about those who post the posts in the first place though, that's the point of a forum. Some people post posts that I consider nonsensical, pointless or downright irritating. They have that right, and I have the right to reply to it (though generally dont). By posting your opinion here you're inviting others opinions. There are people with lots of opinions (this is the real world, after all) so what else do you expect? You can't pick and choose your audience online.
What's the point in an RIP thread anyway?
Well it's a pretty normal and standard procedure to inform others when someone fairly famous has died, or when someone known to them has died - no great mystery there imo.
However there will always be small minority of sad inadequates who see it as an opportunity to inform everyone just how little they care, or how much they disliked the person and how glad they are to hear of their death. What motivates these people [i]is[/i] a mystery to me. Although I'm hugely satisfied by the fact that I don't understand their train of thoughts.
Really, 5thElephant? Would adding Clarkson make it less odd?
Not really. Maybe a pattern will emerge when you publish the full list.
I did not know their dad why would I - it is the same thing
No, but they did. Feeling emotional about the death of your father is reasonable and expressing condolences to that person is equally reasonable - in person.
Eh you sure about that"hiya how are you" Fine or crap my dad died which is more likely ? Hiya nice weekend? - Yes fine or no my dad died etc - you would not tell people if this happened?
Not sure I understand that post at all, it doesn't seem to form normal sentences, but I'll have a stab...
Posting a thread isn't the same dynamic, and apart from that someones dad is much more personal. Posting a thread is walking ito a room and saying something to everyone - you wouldn't walk into work and say "my dad died, discuss". That's why "RIP these people" or "Amy winehouse dead" threads are essentially just sensationalist "look I've got news you should all look at" posts, that I dislike.
Well it's a pretty normal and standard procedure to inform others when someone fairly famous has died, or when someone known to them has died - no great mystery there imo.However there will always be small minority of sad inadequates who see it as an opportunity to inform everyone just how little they care, or how much they disliked the person and how glad they are to hear of their death. What motivates these people is a mystery to me. Although I'm hugely satisfied by the fact that I don't understand their train of thoughts.
I don't think it's that normal to be honest. When I saw Winehouse had died I though "shame for her parents" and went on with my life - why the hell would I post it on singletrack? I didn't even mention it to my nearest friend, and in fact found it really odd when I got a text from a friend telling me. I just don't get why anyone would think it a good idea to post on a forum for discussion, I never do - drug addled person or not. I can understand those who post looking for support with a family member who died, but a famous person (that everyone will find out through the news anyway)? Why? And to then have a mini hissy fit when people say things they don't like? Very odd.
Oh dear. I've only started three threads on STW and one of them was in hommage to Mark Haines. Not one reply so either no-one felt concerned or everyone felt my black-humoured tribute to the respected CNBC anchor was fitting.
Can we not have any RIP threads at all. Others personal feelings about people they don't know are not interesting to us.
If it was this would be singleobituaryworld.
Rest in Peace. One of the most fatuous comments in my opinion.
It's the internet, the device that allows people to paint a thin veneer over what they would never say in public compared to what they feel the need to say anonymously by hiding behind a username and fake persona.
sums up quite a few on here, I wonder why this forum attracts so many idiots?
Coffee king - I see your point about not doing RIP threads in general. However once they are mentioned it seems a bit off/unkind/heartless to enter the thread to call her an oxygen thief and a waste of skin as one poster did. I wont discuss /debate it anywhere but here so I have to accept you are correct in general - I did even contribute to it but will not in future threads like that.
RIP decency, common sense and respect - stw forum 😕
...hello fatuous, threadbare, "empathy".RIP decency, common sense and respect
I agree with JY, there's no need to go into a RIP thread and be nasty, but equally RIP threads are a gawking overindulgence to the terminally uninteresting. Go handwring and sob over someone you dont know in private if you feel the need. Doing it in the middle of the STW town square is just a self indulgence.
A bit harsh stoner - but I tend to agree. The ones that really annoy me is the death of an anonymous cyclist somewhere in the UK. At least we know who Amy Winehouse is.
but equally RIP threads are a gawking overindulgence to the terminally uninteresting
That's an exercise in making a fatuous statement in itself. There are the world of completely uninteresting (to me, but not to all) threads day after day - but that's the beauty of STW - someone will find something interesting - there's no point whinging about it. Somebody quite famous and talented died - it's obvious people are going to discuss their work and contribution to arts - this can be done without being maudlin you know. It's not just STW where you're going to find insensitivity. I guess you believe it's all just beneath you and if you do, then just shut the arse up about it TBH or find a forum where everything that gets mentioned interests you and is to your taste.
RIP - The squirrel I squished today.
Somebody quite famous and talented died - it's obvious people are going to discuss their work and contribution to arts
No problem with that bit.
Its the "rest in peace, she was a troubled soul" or "obviously my thoughts are with her family right now" fatuous witterbollocks that's just a shout of "me, me , me! I can be more empathetic than you!"
I don't think it's that at all Stoner, people say what they think should be said and what is generally seen as a suitable thing to say
people say what they think should be said and what is generally seen as a suitable thing to say
what on earth for other than purely selfish reasons?
Sincerity requires honesty not trotting cliches out in the right order.
Stoner - I hope you're not trolling as you're speaking a lot of truth.
Stoner - point made ease off eh?
YOu are right tho - I loathe the grief athletes - people do it without thinking tho - it has become the accepted thing to do
I was going to respond to some of the stuff directly personally to me on here, but those people would in all likelihood not give a shit as they're far too self-absorbed in their own egos to consider that some people view the world and act differently to how they do. I'll keep the attention seeking, mawkish, navel gazing **** to myself from now on.
not trolling.
anyway, got to go and write a sincere letter to a friend. Picking the right words will take a while.
See, I wouldn't post platitudes or cliches in one of those threads but I also wouldn't post jokes, tasteless comments, etc. If you can't say something nice say nothing IMO.
Well the original RIP thread (that I din't feel the need to contribute to) sparked the "choices" thread which I'm following with interest and this one; an atttempt at censorship through peer presuure that I'm resisting.
Kit - I give a shit... would you like a hug to help you through these tough emotionally draining times?
TSY - I don't give a shit, do I still get a hug?
If you can't say something nice say nothing IMO.
This
Jeremy. It's "though". Sorry. Carry on
If you can't say something nice say nothing IMO.
Are you still tied to your mothers apron strings? Thats just another tired cliché, usually spoken by mothers too stupid to deal with awkward issues raised by their kids.
MSP - MemberAre you still tied to your mothers apron strings? Thats just another tired cliché, usually spoken by mothers too stupid to deal with awkward issues raised by their kids.
Nah. It's a way of dealing with other people without being a c***. Try it. Most subjects are fine for having a kickabout, but some, not so much. Some people are public grief junkies, others are heartless, thoughtless, tactless idiots. Trick is to be somewhere inbetween.
Yep, Dave you're always welcome to a hug. Especially after going for a swim, a bike [i]and[/i] a run today.
Difficult one this. To am extent, I agree with Stoner. Perhaps I've felt that way since the death of "The Nations Princess". However, and strange as it may seem, I did garner a measure of helpful compassion when I related the death of my parents here on STW - even though most of the comments were from people I have never met.
STW is plumbing new depths over this issue.
All the pish taking and crap jokes about Winehouse I've heard/seen today does make me think- well, what if it was someone close to you? how would you really feel? I don't find it hard to find some empathy or compassion for someone I don't know who may have problems. I'm constantly surprised that people can not.
Just for the OP, and pretty much sums up my thoughts about RIP threads in general:
http://www.emptyplatitudes.com/
I don't find it hard to find some empathy or compassion for someone I don't know who may have problems. I'm constantly surprised that people can not.
Indeed.
to have empathy or compassion is not that difficult unless you're a psychopath, obviously. Empathy and compassion doesnt need an audience.
The need to prance around being ostensibly "empathetic" on a forum which your empathetic target is never, ever going to read, is just an ego trip and an effort to capture a little reflected light. This is not the same as emotional support for someone we do know like druidh though.
Again, it's just another form of snobbery...terms used are designed to elevate the user to some kind of intellectual plane above those who they would view as "grief tourists".
Someone said to me at the weekend, "Did you hear about the shootings in Norway?" I replied, "Yes, awful isn't it, I can't begin to imagine how they must all feel today" (This could be a made-up conversation, but is perfectly feasible).
Again, naturally, you'd probably prefer we all keep a stiff upper lip about it and pretend it hasn't even happened, not mention it, for fear that someone may express sympathy for victims, out loud...OUT LOUD FFS!
this may sound a bit daft to some of the more.. err, stern posters perhaps..
but I'm guessing that when a popular celeb dies, or an islandful of Norwegian kids.. it can briefly touch the heart of some folk, and these threads might just be an opportunity to share a little of that emotion and bond with people that are feeling the same way..
We [i]could[/i] grieve all day about each and every futile death but that would take up too much time and our lives would be filled with sorrow.. so why not take these opportunities to share a little manageable grief together..?
I'm sure that anyone who has attended a funeral service will know that taking any positive experience from a death is always heartily encouraged..
Maybe it can be viewed as an exercise in showing off if you choose to look at it cynically enough.. so what..?
Is it really any better or worse than showing off an ability to build twee gazebo type structures on the side of yer opulent manse..?
Not really.. 🙂
I think that maybe some forum members are desperately in need of a flippin' good cuddle and a sob so that they can release some of that overpowering repression..
The need to prance around being ostensibly "empathetic" on a forum which your empathetic target is never, ever going to read, is just an ego trip and an effort to capture a little reflected light.
Have a look at this thread Stoner, I can't find a single example of anyone prancing around being ostensibly empathetic towards a target who is never ever going to read it.
http://www.singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/amy-winehouse-dead-1
Can [i]you[/i] find any examples of people showing excessive grief (or excessive empathy)? Admittedly I only quickly glanced through it, but all I can see are some people expressing sadness at the death of a singer, which in most cases they appreciated.
I think this is another case of people's predetermined opinions not matching the actual facts.
Have a look at this thread Stoner, I can't find a single example of anyone prancing around being ostensibly empathetic towards a target who is never ever going to read it.
this
really sad news. obviously a really troubled soul.a huge talent that produced [b]the[/b] seminal pop album of the noughties.
r.i.p
RIP East Africa famine victims
😯 yes lots of people have died, many more are dying or will die. BUT YOU CAN STILL HELP!
MSP.. eh..?
I think you've misunderstood the meanings of some words somewhere there mate.. your example isn't making any sense.. 😕
If that's the best you can come up with MSP, I'm not impressed. The reference to a "troubled soul" is perfectly appropriate - few people would deny that was the case. And clearly the poster was a huge fan of her's. So what - does that signify 'excessive empathy' ?
That comment is as valid on a forum, as is informing people what you are eating, drinking, and listening to.
RIP The no BS thread
Killed another squirrel this morning... this time in my car.
RIP.
Killed another squirrel this morning... this time in my car.RIP.
Whoosh (again)
you do realise that every time you run over a squirrel God kills a kitten..?
That's not the sound it made. 😥
What sound did it make TSY?
More of a thud. There was probably a bit of a crunch but I was rocking out Classic FM so missed some of the more subtle notes.
And how are you feeling about it now?
No matter what your oinion of Amy Winehouse, whether you have complete sympathy for a lost talent who lived a tortured life riddled with substance abuse and depresson, or whether you think she was a drugged-up loser whos death was inevitable and only has herself to blame - that truth is that this is an open public forum, and (within the rules of those who own and run this forum) you are entitled to comment what you believe and so are the other hundreds of users interested in this topic.
So posting on a public forum assuming that someone else won't post an opinion contrary to your own just shows complete ignorance for how internet forums work.
IMPO - I thought her music, style and choice of boyfriend was awful, yet if anyone knows anyone suffering, has known anyone who suffered from or knows anything about substance abuse, the associated depression and other associated disorders would agree with me that she would have been going through the most traumatic, hellish time of her life, as would those who deeply cared or loved her and tried to help her, and for her life to have ended in this way is just terrible for everyone involved.
Pretty shaken up.
I've been on a bit of a road kill spree recently, couple of weeks ago I got a cat (RIP) so I'd have thought I'd be becoming desensitized now.
I'm not going to flush any more spiders down the sink to redress my karma imbalance. Do you think that'll help?
I'd be becoming desensitized now.
Reads like you already are.
Maybe I'm in shock??
I'll ask if I can have the rest of the day off.