Got invited to a neighbours birthday party. Significant number for both of them so they hired venue, laid on buffet, free bar etc.
My neighbours also got invited and I grabbed a lift as one of them was driving.
Near end of evening they were flagging as they had been out the night before.
I knew this and was happy to leave earier than the venue closing time.
Was chatting to some other folk, and my neighbours said they were leaving so time to go and off they march out the door.
No "Thanks for inviting me, lovely to see you, goodbye "to the joint hosts.
They literally headed straight for the door and out into the night.
Not wanting a 5 mile walk home i quickly followed as they were on a mission to get home.
Now aibu to think this really is bad manners and quite rude?
Doesn't sit well with me at all and I'm thinking a quick 'thamk you' note through the door might be a nice thing to do.
Mitigating circumstances were. Hosts on other side of dance floor and we were avoiding dancing and the randoms who seem to think you really want to dance with them when you really dont. The joint hosts were chatting to loads of people. We were first to leave as well.
Discuss.
Is this an Indy Scot a brexit thread in disguise? 🤔
Sometimes it's better to slip away quietly rather than indulge in overblown expressions of gross insincerity.
Sometimes it’s better to slip away quietly rather than indulge in overblown expressions of gross insincerity.
AKA a 'French exit'. My preffered option from my many employers 🙃
Not sure it's worth sitting on fit his and then resorting to a bike forum for an expected "there there" and virtual hug
As an adult - get over it, you got a free lift there 🤷🏻
lifes too short for this crap.
I think a quick thank you note should be fine and should get you a lift next time.
Maybe one to the hosts too.
😆
Seriously you're thinking far too much op. Just say cheers when you see them next.
"Great party the other night mate, had to slip away as {lamo's next door} couldn't hack it and they were my lift...."
Overreacting imo
A 'thank you' note through the door would def be a nice thing to do.
Other than that, sometimes when you're tired from the night before you just don't feel like doing long goodbye. French exit, I've done it a few times before, it depends on the type of night really. A big drunken party with tons of people, not much of an issue. A small dinner party with just 4-6 of you there, yep that would be a bit weird!
Had they filled the boot with food and booze before legging it?
Is this just a “French Leave”?
Omg I had no idea that that phrase has been in use since 1771!!
We need both sides of the story really, in order to be judge, jury and executioner 😀
For example, I have some friends that when 'leaving', will litterally take 45 mins+ and several more drinks 'working the room' and saying goodbye/engaging in extensive small talk, given half a chance.
Conversely, when I'm leaving, I'm off, like in 30 seconds, great doo! see you soon! call me x..bye!
Is this just a “French Leave”?
I’ve heard it called “Irish leave” as well.
Or "filer a l'anglaise"
Your thinking too much !!
There comes a point in the evening when folk are leaving in drins and drabs. There's no better way to spoil the hosts mood than by having constant interruptions with folk saying their goodbyes.
Mind you don't Busta Bloodvessel.
If you're going to a shindig, and you dont really know the hosts, though this only really works if you know they like cooking. Instead of bringing a cheap bottle of plonk, go and buy a decent bottle of red wine vinegar.
A £7 bottle of wine is pretty tasteless stuff, but a £7 bottle of red wine vinegar is usually some of the best.
couldn't you have got a taxi?
There’s no better way to spoil the hosts mood than by having constant interruptions with folk saying their goodbyes
Yep. This is my take on it. Personally I think it's a bit rude to make your leaving all about you. Two sides and all that. Don't drag the mood down, just leave and ping them a message to say thanks the next day.
Mind you don’t Busta Bloodvessel.
Lip up, Fatty...
"Bad manners or just plain rude?" neither, ppl just getting on with their lives
[i]I think it's down right rude of you to be[/i] judging the ppl who gave you the lift on the internet, this sits far less comfortably with me, than them leaving a party when they were ready.
Mind you don’t Busta Bloodvessel.
That deserved more recognition.
"Sorry I didn't say goodnight the other evening. I was vomiting behind your rose bushes and then passed out. Surprised you didn't see my feet in your garden. Was a hell of a job staggering home at 3am.."
If you’re going to a shindig, and you dont really know the hosts, though this only really works if you know they like cooking. Instead of bringing a cheap bottle of plonk, go and buy a decent bottle of red wine vinegar.
I love cooking. I love good ingredients. I would be as confused as anything if someone handed me a bottle of vinegar if I hosted a party. Why not give them an expensive artisan loaf of bread? (Some are over a fiver in London..). Why not an expensive wooden spoon? A jar of pickled gherkins?
I love cooking. I love good ingredients. I would be as confused as anything if someone handed me a bottle of vinegar if I hosted a party.
Yea, this.
This is a good example of why you should never invite vague acquaintances to parties.
If you know the person well enough to buy them a present they actually want, do that. If you don't, then you've been invited out of courtesy and should enjoy yourself before leaving quietly. Not interrupting every other groups conversations/dancing to say your goodbyes. Especially if it's your neighbor and you can just say thanks in daylight the next day.
Was it Lorraine’s party?
"Presents" like a bottle of plonk for a host is a nice thing to do if it's a one-off.
If it's good friends then... what? I come to yours and bring a bottle; you then come to mine and bring a bottle; I come to yours and... rinse and repeat. We could just have the one bottle we pass around between houses. It's a nice sentiment but it's silly.
I'm a bit confused by all of this, but I tend to 'disappear' from parties unless I know the host really well. Sure if the host was just standing there doing nothing I'd say good bye, but I'm not going to interrupt other people's goings on just to say thanks / I'm leaving. By the same token, I wouldn't be offended if people did the same to me!
Usually the neighbours are just over the hedge oraround the corner
Never 5 miles away
Was the Duke of Buccleuch hosting the party ?
Did your neighbours point a gun at you to force you in the car taking you home?
That’s the answer to your question.