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what steams & comes out of cows* backwards ?
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The Isle of Wight ferry
* I know
How do you crucify a spastic?
On a swastika........
What's red and invisible?
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No tomatoes.
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What's got 2 legs and bleeds a lot?
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Half a dog
Two cows in a field, one cow says to the other, "Mooooooooo!"
The other cow says, "Aw, I was going to say that!".
Two Scottish cows in a field. Which one's on holiday?
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The one with the wee calf.
Did you hear about the prawn who went to a disco....
...he pulled a mussel.
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Blind man walks past a fish shop......"Morning ladies"
What's brown and sticky?
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A stick.
A jelly baby goes to the doctor's. He's covered in hundreds and thousands, dessicated coconut and black smudges. Doctor says "What have you been up to?". Jelly baby says "****in allsorts!"
ok i didnt read them all but whats Green and invisible?
This cabbage (holding out my hand)