Aus to win by 6 wickets when I wake up?
9 I think
I was trying to be optimistic mike!!! Started at by 7.
I vote for Piers Morgan to come in for the 1 dayers. It's the only way we can salvage something of value from the tour.
The only positive of the series was watching Brett Lee trying yo take that pricks head off, I thought the record attendance was so everyone could have a go.
If I'd been able to have a crack at Morgan I might have even fetched the Beamer out.
What can I possibly say about this England performance and the series in general? I'd love to be a fly on the wall in the dressing room and at the team meetings.
What is Flower saying, for instance?
Is it "don't worry, we're just being unlucky. We got to number one in the world with this approach".
Is he throwing stuff around and effing and blinding?
What is he doing?
Five nil is now odds on. How are England in this situation?
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!
Have the 1 days games started?
Oz 4/94 @ Lunch
Particularly chipper at Warner failing again. True he has got 500 runs in the series. Still 250+ behind his target though 😉
Stoked for Stokes too, looking better every time he gets the ball 🙂
Oh dear, another 'not really good enough' performance so far today.
Why has Root been left out? Is he injured?
Well done Stokes and well wrapped up. Yet again we have them cornered at 97-5 and can't close it out, another good knock from Haddin and Smith, Haddin has been a real thorn in our side all series and has prevented a late order tumble on several occasions - we really haven't done enough to work out how to get him and paid the price...
normal service resumed....
time to wield the bat properly tomorrow or roll over and die
Who is the England bowling coach?
Bowling too short, yet again. It's pathetic.
Great start and I haven't turned it on yet!!!!
Why was Anderson batting?
Night watchman.
KP, Bell and Stokes are going to save the day......
..........So back to work monday can be made bleaker still by another collapse.
this is past pathetic.
😆
This is worse than ever!
Bedtime!
Absolutely bag o shiiii
It's nighttime in Aus as well?!?!
What is the message in sending out a rabbit at the start of the day??????
soft in the head.
I'm going to listen to the smiths instead of TMS
I've literally started posting that if we lose Belly in the next 30 mins then we'll be following on not long after lunch.
Seconds later he goes and gets does that. FFS. This could be worse than Port of Spain in '94.
Thats enough for me. Wifi is dodgy and cricket is too shocking. Watch bravely!!!!
Well that was fun 🙁
I have no hope of anything other than a good thrashing, the senior players have lost all confidence and we have no one able to inflict fear in the Aussy camp. Big changes ahead me thinks... Quite interested to see what happens in the one day series, hopefully we'll see some of the other tourists step up and show some tallent.
Stokes deserves some credit again but the barmy army were England's outstanding performers today... 😳
So lunch, tea or close of play? Will the NSW cricket have a word and try and get Australia to keep day 4 alive?
Thankfully they made the follow on and saved the prospect of not having the Jane Mcgrath day. That would have been embarrassing.
So forget the score and anything else pop some money over here and let some good come of all this cricket. One of the most inspiring sights these days is the Pink Test.
http://www.pinktest.com.au/
http://www.cricket.com.au/video/Carberry-broken-bat
Moment of the series for England
"AUSTRALIA YOU ****ING BEAUTY!!!" indeed!!!
Same 11 players for the 5 Tests, 5-0, suck on that Poms!
Same 11 players for the 5 Tests, 5-0, suck on that Poms!
Trying not to sound bitter but...
England were simply awful, however Australia were rescued by Haddin on a few occasions during the series, this game would have been very different without him getting those scores. South Africa will tell us all how bad England were vs how good Australia were.
"AUSTRALIA YOU **** BEAUTY!!!" indeed!!!Same 11 players for the 5 Tests, 5-0, suck on that Poms!
As glorious in victory as ever, I see 🙄
Haddin should have been man of the series - England have had the ability to flatten the Aussie batsmen just as much as the Aussies at times, and as destructive as Johnson was, it was our absolute ineptitude with the bat that lost us this. Australia weren't far behind in the ineptitude with the bat stakes at times, Haddin always managed to stop the rot.
"AUSTRALIA YOU **** BEAUTY!!!" indeed!!!
Same 11 players for the 5 Tests, 5-0, suck on that Poms!
Fair comment I reckon 😀
How well have the Aussies played? Actually I think we'll never know. England have been so dismal in every department, so shockingly under prepared and badly led that it's not possible to put the Australian resurgence into any kind of perspective yet. I think the next couple of series for both sides will be illuminating.
Zokes - go back to page 1 and look in the mirror. In the context and given the manner of the victory psyche is merely reflecting back what's needs to be reflected!
Haddin was a major contributor for sure (as was Rogers if you look at the batting stats) but in the end 6 Aussies scored more that 300 runs and not a single Englishman (sic) did. For whatever reason, our senior players didn't turn up. Seems like there is (unsurprisingly) crap going on in the dressing room - I wonder why????? What is it that the All Blacks say about not having a ¥¥¥¥ in the team however good they are??????
Well played Aus, you stuffed us good and proper. You bounced back with a total humiliation of the poms. You deserve to enjoy the victory. Shocking capitulation from us though.
I've just gone back and read page 1. 😆
Reading the first few pages makes up for the cricket itself. Guess even Watson found which end of the bat to hold!!!!! How many Englishman averaged more than a guy who can't even hold a bat?
The bogans wouldn't have dreamed of a whitewash at the beginning of the series after losing the last 3 ashes series and the last defeat only a few months ago (I wonder what the odds were for 5-0?)
I can't see them going on to great things and dominating like they have done in the past, they were handed this series on a plate without having to fight for it, surprised cook didn't politely knock on the dressing room door after the first test and say "here you are you better look after the urn for a bit"
They have SA next which I will be watching with interest.
As for England changes will be made but hopefully not a new coach or captain, getting rid of them would be a mistake, changes to a few key positions but hopefully not a clean sweep.
I can think of one who needs to concentrate on IPL/big bash league and retire from test cricket. 🙄
Fair comment I reckon
+ 1 why not celebrate it? it has been nothing short of a miraculous drubbing on their part and the Poms have been utterly and completely crushed in all departments
I liked the Boycs comment about Aus being an average team and you could not make one good team from both sets of players
Not good for England as it is a very average side and they were extraordinarily poor in all areas [ except Broad]
Not good for England as it is a very average side and they were extraordinarily poor in all areas [ except Broad]
I'm adding Stokes to the list, the way he walked off looking pissed off after his first 100 in Perth said it all.
yes fair point he has done enough to keep his place and has the highest average with the bat [35] 😯
hard to say on carberry as he is second on 29 behind pietersen on 29 - does that make him good or bad?
Not good for England as it is a very average side and they were extraordinarily poor in all areas [ except Broad]
It's not that good for the bogans either. If they had windies or Bangladesh up next it would be even worse as it's just more cannon fodder and no chance to dig-in or think their way out of situations and another test series handed to them on a plate.
SA are the best thing that could happen to them, on the back of this win they probably think they can string 3-4 test series together and be number 1 in the rankings.
It surprises me to say it but I'm slightly (only slightly mind) pleased for Australia. They have been pretty toilet for a few years now and racked with infighting and the like. Somehow in a pretty short period they've regrouped, found some belief and regained some form. Much as watching MJ was difficult as an England fan I am pleased to see a bloke who was almost completely crushed and a laughing stock come back so hard. Clarke has captained very well this series - I do think he lacks a bit of class but that's by the by. Lehmann has managed a lightweight and misfiring squad very effectively. Again he lacks class but I'm sure most Aussies will overlook that right now. So congrats through clenched teeth to Australia (and our resident Aussie posters) - thoroughly deserved and a sweet feeling for them.
England? Where to start? I'm too disgusted to even think about it at the moment.
England were truly abysmal. Hopefully the bubble of delusion has been well and truly popped. They only just survived against the Kiwi's away and at home last year.
The danger for Australia of course is that they now assume the delusory bubble and regard themselves as anything better than the mediocre team that they clearly are. I shall also be rooting for the South African's to dismantle the Aussie's.
Yossarian +1 very well put.
I agree.
MJ's test stats are now respectable they were poor before his performance this series.
Hopefully he will revert to type 😉
Well, that's your lot for a couple of years (at least, I think).
We've lost the Ashes five nil to a pretty gash Aussie team. Two players have (for varying reasons) chucked a sickie and gone home early. It really has been an absolute shambles. We have let Steve Smith score two hundreds in the series for heaven's sake.
You can stick your ODIs as well, they are a total irrelevance (in general and specifically now on this tour). Might as well let the U19s have a go in those.
I am utterly astounded by the manner in which we gave the ashes back to Australia. Only Stokes can really come home with anything to shout about.
Zokes - go back to page 1
Actually, reading quite a bit of this thread from the start has been rather amusing in a black comedy sort of way...
Interesting to see Vaughny calling for KP to be vice captain.
zokes - Member
Interesting to see Vaughny calling for KP to be vice captain.
Had a little smile and thought of you when I saw that!!!!!
Cricket makes my head hurt. I'm Scottish so it might be the fear of Sunshine...but I want to like it.
So not understanding all the subtlities of the last 20 pages:
Did England not win quite comprehensively in the Summer?
And now you got blootered by the Aussies, but why?
Is it like Man U win the league and now they're gash?
