[Closed] ARE ALL BMW X5 DRIVERS...

I file them along with fixie riders

where do you stop? all bmw drivers? all german car drivers? all those who drive european made cars? all car drivers?!

Just X5s

No need to actually read the thread, answer is a definite yes.

billybob - only applies to X5 (and X3) drivers!

Yup X5 drivers. Was raced by one the other day (and boyishly took him oon). As he couldn't keep up, he contented himself with trying to push me off the road at the next roundabout. C0CK indeed

Tw**s the lot of them in Beemers but X5 drivers have to take a special "Tw*t test" to make sure they are c0ck5 of the highest order and therefore worthy to drive an X5.

I believe there is a waiting list for the test? mainly made up of 3 series driver.

X3s are driven by men with less than average sized willies. X5s are driven by men with even smaller ones. Oh, while i'm at it, the orange lady in the passenger seat will be off as soon as the money runs out.

This made me smile.
Currently teaching my daughter to drive and I have warned her not to trust anyone in a 4 x 4.
I like to think this is based on prcatical experience and evidence rather than prejudice.
Have also warned her not to trust anyone driving in a hat, ( OAP or chav.)

I did have an X5 driver flash me to let me cycle out of junction a couple of weeks back.
I can only assume that he'd stolen it.

worst are the X5's with stickers on the rear window that say
"my other car's an Audi"
that is when its time to really worry!

Hang on, let me just ask my mother-in-law...

Actually her husband bought it and at present she thinks he is the biggest A-hole on the planet so your theory could be sound.

Does she look like a small Asian guy with an orange girlfriend?

Oi peterstarkiss.

I aint a chav, or OAP. and like my hats (beanie's to be precise) and regularly leave it on when hopping in the car.
baseball/burberry caps at pointy angles is a different thing...

Only 1 X5 over here, Driver is a cock. Pulled out of his driveway right in front of me the other day. Stopped 30 feet down the road to drop off his bottles in the recycling.

my ex had one and she was a complete c)ck... only without said apendage. lol. It extends beyond x5's, agree on x3's and generally 4x4's... BMW drivers generally seem plebs. Based on experience of years of being run off the road commuting, near death experiences and general driving experience.

its not just the X5 drivers... its the BMW drivers... full stop
i have never met a nice or good one yet 🙁

there are quite a few bmw's around here with number plates ending with FUD,
seems about right!

Harry_the_Spider - Member

X3s are driven by men with less than average sized willies. X5s are driven by men with even smaller ones. Oh, while i'm at it, the orange lady in the passenger seat will be off as soon as the money runs out.

All drivers of chelsea tractors are cocks
All drivers of bmw's are cocks
Therefore X5 drivers are cock squared

Audi Q7 drivers are even worserer

Gone a bit quiet on this one - are we all watching bbc1?

Just cooling down from a ride where the highlight was a stand up argument with Mr Range Rover Sport. He was content with shouting at me through the passenger window (across his cringing orange lady passenger) until I called his car a heap of shit, when he got out with the intention of having a go. Happy days.

Bunch of stereotyping b*s.

Most of the X5s around here have been traded in for Q7s.
I think what that means is that X5s are now only for wannabees.

I didn't have any arguments on tonights ride but I made the ****er sign at a man in a van when he overtook and then immediately turned left. He stopped and stood in the road like a little boy who's tricycle had been kicked over, shouting at me with his little podgy cheeks getting redder and redder. I stood and looked at him for a bit. Poor lad, he really was quite confused about his level of importance in the world. It was quite sad really.

But what about disco driver too? One tried to cut me up yesterday but one of the perks about having a 12 year old 306 is that I don't mind if he hits me. Had an X5 try to to pull in on a slip road in front of me the toher day but saw hiim before undertaking and overtaking in my rear view so thought he could wait til the next junxtion. I could see him waving his fist at me so I gave him thumbs up.

samuri - Member

I didn't have any arguments on tonights ride but I made the ****er sign at a man in a van when he overtook and then immediately turned left. He stopped and stood in the road like a little boy who's tricycle had been kicked over, shouting at me with his little podgy cheeks getting redder and redder. I stood and looked at him for a bit. Poor lad, he really was quite confused about his level of importance in the world. It was quite sad really.

I had a similar situation last week, but it was a mum with 2 little darlings in an X3 who just squeezed past me and then had to almost stand the thing on its grill to turn left...

Only to find her exit blocked by a tractor turning out & 2 girls on horses going her way. My "[i]I guess you must be really important[/i]" didn't go down to well as she jumped out and started simultaneously swearing at me and sort of spitting/frothing at the mouth.
I might have made some comment about "[i]her behaviour not being the best example to the girls in her car[/i]" this only made the situation worse so I decided to ride away.
30 seconds later a bloke pulled level with me and expecting another mouth full totally surprised me by saying "[i]good on you mate for standing up to the bitch[/i]"!!

Amusing commute #38: Bloke turns down side road, stops, turns on to footpath and drives up it. Winds window down to pop letter in postbox. Swings down someones drive to get back on the road. I let you guess what he was driving...

Re move the X5 bit and you have got it right. BMWs are replacing Volvos. Every single one seems to ignore the rules. No indicators. why do BMW get away with out fitting them? Must bugger up an MOT. 😀
TO fast driving , middle lane hogging, useless in country roads. Grrrrr
And red ones are driven by blonde bimbos

I live on a road that has a private prep school on it, Daily I have to run the gauntlet of poorly driven enormous 4x4s. Drives me nuts the stuff they get up to. I'm vaguely hoping that the fashion runs it's course and they all decide to trade them in for Mini's or those ickle Fiats

Just to provide some balance...

Three of us on a road ride on Monday night - we approached a mini roundabout, as did an X5 coming from our right. Despite the X5 having right of way, the driver stopped to let us through. I was so shocked by this display of courtesy that I forgot to give a wave of thanks.

Both my housemates drive like people i normaly hate, and one of them has a porche 4x4 thingy and a black freelander van (which goes like shit off a shovel) :-s

If anyone gets cut up by a black freelander with a white square ariel above the spare tire, don't get angry with it, you will come off worse.

thisisnotaspoon you share a house with people who own those sort of cars? Ghetto fabulous springs to mind.

Pfft nothing wrong with BMWs (though I don't have or want an X5 :p ), I generally see more tossers in Audi's these days...

On a similar note, I saw a broken down VW Toerag being pushed though a busy intersection tonight.

I know a bloke who drives a BMW (not an X5 though) and he's a very nice man. His wife drives a 4x4 and she's a lovely person.

Just in the interest of balance...

As a group, cyclists are by many sectors of society thought of as obnoxious, anti-social, suicidal heathens with no respect for anyone and a total disregard for everything around them. We are all tarred with the same brush as used on those who ride on pavements, ride through red lights and on footpaths, scare livestock, tear up the trails and terrorise innocent pedestrians.

And despite this, we ourselves are still capable of such blind, ignorant, self-righteous opinionated crap.

Threads like this fill me with utter despair.

I own a BMW and go out of my way to indicate early, let people out of junctions and generally be a courteous driver just to even the balance up.

I also ought to admit a mate has an X5 and he is a thoroughly nice bloke although I can't comment on the standard of his driving.

I tried really hard to not buy a BMW but unfortunately they make the best cars 🙁

They do make cars that handle very nicely- not all of them but alot of them. Amazed that their 330 engine is as economical for such a bog engine. The 330d is mental when chipped. I remember test driving one once and the amount of people who cut me up, wouldnt let me out etc- well, made me think. Is it a cyclic-level of abuse?

penguinious, that makes you a RACIST, BURN HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We prefer the term multicutural hell-hole to Gheto :p
Moving out next month 🙂

Technicaly i think he has 3 compnay cars, a mazda RX-8, the hideous proche, and the freelander. Got to love being a contract worker, eh?

One of the blokes in my office drives an x3 and he is a **** on the roads but wehn i have pointed out to him (with video) he thinks its funny and says that bike shouldn't be on the road as they don't pay tax 😕 .
Just to balance it i had 2 BMW's let me pull out when riding home yesterday.
I find that the vast magority of drivers are ok but those that think they are driving a 'luxury' car are the worst for cutting you up and trying to bully you out of the way.
I have noticed a complete lack of ralising what a solid white line is for when riding home from work but that seems to cover just about every driver going.

ive got to say that when ever i'm traveleing any distance its Always tyhe German cars that are the source of all the Bad driving on the roads! be it lanes, a roads or motorways! never ceases to amaze me how bad they get lol!

i think with a lot fo them its a case of My car cost more thanyours therefor i am Much richer and important so get out the way! sadly, it should be pointed out that thye are the misguided souls!
mind you, they do provide an income for a lot of my friends in the trade (car cleaning) so cant all be bad!

what was it Clarkson said? - "stressed out mother in scruffy dressing grown and tousled hair has to drive a Volvo XC90, whilst posh woman with expensive hairdo on her head and none at all between her legs must drive a Range Rover Sport"

not sure what that's got to do with BMW's but made me laugh...........

Yes, it's all BMW drivers of which I am one so shove it up your a55es you beardy wearing, fixie riding, holier than thou pedants.

True story coming up:

My Mrs used to have a company car a MINI One and very nice it was too.

She asked me to drop it off with a BMW dealer to get it serviced, so I trotted off with her car to do just that.

As I was being dealt with at the service desk, a angry women came in dropping off her X5 in a fowl mood, all snotty and rude to the staff.

We both waited for the staff members to sort out the keys to our loan cars.

One of staff member came back me and looking quite apologetic said there had been a mix up with the loan car and if it was OK with me, would I mind using one of the staff cars, to which I replied that would be fine, she then told me it was a BMW 6 series!

The look on the other customers face was absolutely priceless as the other service staff member said her loan car was ready, a BMW 1 series something?

She hit the roof!

Going on, that she brought a X5 in and should have the 6 series and how could they possibly let someone with a MINI have a car like that!

Only when I picked up my Mrs car later, did the staff say that they did it just to wind her up!

Guess they don't like rude X5 drivers too 😉

i think with a lot fo them its a case of My car cost more thanyours therefor i am Much richer and important so get out the way! sadly, it should be pointed out that thye are the misguided souls!

Or "I have a HPI agreement which needs servicing"

We employed someone who drove a nearly new Audi convertible on credit. He couldnt afford a set of new tyres let alone run the bloody thing. Idiot.

Someone at work asked about my Nissan Pathfinder and came out with "it's a beast - didn't expect that coz you're a cyclist..."

fennesz, generalisers tend to generalise about everything in life.

You smoke? You are a burden on the health service.
You ride a bike? Your a cyclist.

Cliches exist because they are generally true.

But for me it's not the arrogance or the selfishness of many 4x4 drivers that winds me up, so much as the unimaginativeness.

Oi I drive a 4x4. TBH I would prefer to stay AWD rather than go back to FWD. It just feels more stable/grip/better. My car isnt a proper 4x4 though, more allwheeldrive..

(Not mine/mines not as posh but a likeness)
[img] [/img]

Ideal for growing families.

mmmmmmm scooby, didnt Clarkson test a legacy in its sporty spec? Said somethign about it being the best sports car ever because even an average person could take it to its limits (there was a very scared Subaru rally driver in the passenger seat)!

hora - Member
Oi I drive a 4x4. TBH I would prefer to stay AWD rather than go back to FWD. It just feels more stable/grip/better. My car isnt a proper 4x4 though, more allwheeldrive..

Am I being thick here, but whats the difference between 4 wheel drive and All wheel drive??

its a bit like the difference between all-mountain jeycore gnarl, and jeycore freeride lite rocky.

I was going to pick up a c5yr old MX5 in Oct/Nov but I dont think this is possible now 🙁

thisisnotaspoon didnt see that clip but considering Im nowhere near a technical driver - My Forester stepped out in torrential rain, I lifted so it pendulum-swung the other way so I buried the throttle and it wiggled back. Another car I'd have probably spun it but the Forester never felt like I had 'lost control' just 'stepped out of line' (girlfriend wasnt impressed mind).

Am I being thick here, but whats the difference between 4 wheel drive and All wheel drive??

I used to have a Forester of mental engine flavour (had been breathed upon by Prodrive). Ace fun, very quick and more fun than should be legal down forestry roads. Only problem was when bits fell off it cost a fortune to repair. Everything had to be flown in from Japan 🙁

Changed that for a Saab, but that was pants off road and the suspension kept falling off 😉

Changed that for a Nissan Navara which was loads of fun on beaches, surprisingly quick on the road and more frugal than I would have thought possible (32 - 34mpg IIRC, had it up at 40mpg when pootling around the Western Isles). Alas the engine blew up regular as clockwork so it was in the garage more than I was driving it. Got shot of it as soon as the warranty expired (so in a year then, it was second hand and I do 30k a year)

So now I have a Suzuki Vitara, bought brand new (company car) and it is ace. Other than being as thirsty/thirstier than the Navara. I throw loads of tools in it and drive around Cumbria, then over a few fields... just keeps going.

And get this. I let people out of junctions, give cyclists space when I pass (not necessarily on the other carriage way, but the 2 - 3 feet clearance that I would give a car or moped). I tend to get chased down by posh 4x4s when I overtake them, for some reason this is a slur on their cars performance see - I think that the Vitara is about the slowest option available... I drive fast as I am trying to maintain momentum, slowing down and speeding up is deeply inefficient both on fuel and time!

I tend to find that Audis are driven by complete cocks, along with a few of the beemers, though less than in the past. Mini Coopers are also pricks cars by and large... and anything driven by an old person or a boy racer.

Speaking of boy racers - why the hell do they always try and stop me passing on the bike? Soon as I pull out the accelerate hard! Do they think they can go faster (bike probably has the same bhp as their ****chariot???)

Drivers - waaaaay too many poor ones on the road. You really notice it when you get out the box and onto 2 wheels, more so when you are able to travel at the same speed or faster than cars.

RobS, thats what I dont get. The same people think you are climbing ontop and humping them if they let you overtake them so they often speed up as you pull out to stop this then they anchor on and bimble round the corner (with you behind thinking WTF).