[Closed] Anyone had a child kept 'down' a year?

I can't see that teachers would take such a decision lightly. I wouldn't fancy being the one who had to suggest this to you (I'm sure you're a lovely chap by the way).

He's only eight and will get over this far more quickly than he would if he suffers later on and is kept back at a later age.

Best of luck with it though - you seem to be taking a very mature approach to it - I'm sure it can't be easy.

not had direct experience but here's my 2p

holding back a year means a year older before the switch to a "big" school, arguably a good thing from your description

if he is so far ahead in some subjects this needs to be maintained, ask the school what do they propose, also ask how they propose to manage the repeat year

he's got 10 more years of school anyway, what's the problem with one more?

I'd suggest its a good thing, he'll probably get further ahead in the things that he's good at, but will give more time to work on spellings and things.

He'll probably be happier to, if he can make some good friends. As long as he knows he's not being kept down for not being not bright enough, I'm sure it'll be ok. Although he's only 8, definitely worth getting his opinion on, he may not be able to make an informed decision, but he'll feel like he's involved in it and might be helpful to know.

Let us know what you decide!

I was kept down a year at 10 years old due to being diagnosed with Dyslexia, which was still quite 'new' at the time, now have a good BEng amongst other qualifications, so don't worry about it.

From the very brief description you have given, it sounds like your son may have some issues which may be better dealt with following a proper assessment. This is something the school should be able to help with, but if they can't or wont, speak to your GP.

Did this come out of the blue? If it was a complete surprise (ie you have no reason to think that your lad needed to be kept back) then I'd say hell no. If it's a surprise but still sort of makes sense to you, you can see what they're saying, then maybe yes.

Agree you have to give a lot of weight to what the teachers think - they're the professionals and they see and compare kids en masse. If for any reason, though, you suspect that logistical / other external factors are influencing this suggestion then you need to boot it into the weeds.
e.g. wouldn't it be convenient if we had x number of students in the new class, because we only have y staff one day of the week. We can hold this wee man back, he's only young and he needs to work on his spelling anyway. That sort of bolex.

We had a similar dilemma with our 4yr old, should he start school in August and be the absolute youngest, or stay in nursery for another year (also Scotland so the same flexibility and composite classes as you have). In may ways he's pretty bright, but he's hopeless at sitting still, listening, doing what he's told and so on. So we were a bit worried he wasn't ready for school. In the end, his nursery teachers and the school head said that he definitely was ready, and that he'd be fine, so off he goes to school in August. I guess we trusted the teachers judgement and experience, so if you're happy that they are suitably competent then their advice would probably be worth following.

No personal experience of my own child but i was at school with a kid who went the other way ie. he was very bright so they moved him up a year. Really nice guy but problem was his maturity did not match his abilities.

He did not shine in our form and actually spent most of the time being the form jester hence he was very popular but he did not achieve academically what he could have done and i think because of his immaturity he did suffer.

So although i appreciate it is a hard decision to make it may be a good thing for him to stay behind a year, mature a bit more and then move on. As you also suggest that extra time may allow him to develop more friendships which will also help with the rest of his school.

Only thing i would say is it is important to talk to teachers about the maths side of things in terms of how to continue to develop his abilities.

As for always being known as the kid who was kept back with the special needs kid, there are lots of reasons why it might be a good idea to keep a child back and each kid is different so it really shouldn't be seen, either by your or him, as an issue.

as another Dyslexia suffer I would suggest your son is displaying enough signs to get him checked out.

As a teacher(secondary)Socialisation is a huge part of primary education,getting him to interact with his peers (other little boys)is a very important part of the growing process.Girls at that age mature quicker,hence nastiness. Education wise, he would just get harder work i.e bigger words/fewer pics 😀 He would also be a year further into any musical tutition etc upon reaching secondary,making him more likely to get access to the nearly extinct school instructors.He would be a year older and as such,more able to cope with the big sch(p)ool (esp if he is going from a rural school,as I assume yours is)
The new CFE has three stages to it,developing,consolidating,secure,our reports are now based on this.He would be consolidating and secure and the main topics on leaving P7,rather than developing/consolidating.There is also more flexability now than when I was a kid,I would imagine the teacher has already had some thoughts on how to keep wee Outandabout interested.Worth asking at meeting,good luck.

I was kept down a year at about that age. Being born in the middle of august meant that I was the youngest in my year, which when combined with the fact that I had been struggling to learn to read and write a language which I didn't fully know/understand, meant that I was falling behind. I was pretty unhappy about leaving my mates but got used to it (and I'm still in touch with a few of them all these years later). I'm not sure how I would have done without having been kept down a year, but I never did very well at school anyway.

hmm, food for thought.
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It was a surprise to us and no I don't think there are issues of learning problems / dyslexia / etc (note both wife and I are both qualified teachers and 8/10 of my staff are dyslexic at work...). All reports and teacher converstions are that he was a lovely kid doing well at school but who can find it hard to knuckle down to work. We at home notice the immaturity.
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Note it dos benefit the school to keep him down as it requires one less member of staff....
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His behavioral issues are not serious, I was more commenting on character and we are trying to be aware of our kids shortcomings, rather than have a bunch of princes who can do no worng...!

Plus he'll be one of the bigger kids in his year so can a) bully the other kids, or b) resist the bullies better.

It worked for Ace Rimmer:
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Could he jump up a year again later? i assume the next class is composite of several years as well.

It was suggested that my 6yr old was kept back one year (last year) but we rejected it.
We took the decision to work on the areas he needed to improve (concentration & doing things he doesn't necessarily enjoy) and it's certainly been the correct decision. He has additional specific tutoring on the problem areas 2 times a week & now considering the development he has made it's almost frightening to think he could have been still repeating the previous year.
(I had similar attention issues at school and had the reverse done where they made me jump a year...)

We're also in small village so I was concerned how the teachers might react if we rejected their proposal but due to the progress he's made it's been no bother (and wasn't at the time we discussed it either).

If you've got time to help tutor on the tricky things maybe it's more useful than just having the little guy repeat a year?

From what you have said I would suggest that mixing with other boys who he can form friendships with is more important than academic achievement at this stage of his education.

I would suggest that you work with the school and trust them. If friendships and interaction are an issue then do what you can out of School to help him.

Note it dos benefit the school to keep him down as it requires one less member of staff....

Could he jump up a year again later? i assume the next class is composite of several years as well.

There you go. Sounds like this one needs flaying to the boundary, Sewag style.

From what you have said I would suggest that mixing with other boys who he can form friendships with is more important than academic achievement at this stage of his education.

Fwiw, across here (Belgium) it is very normal for children to repeat a year in primary school just to find the appropriate level. Non of the children consider it strange although tha parents sometimes have more difficulty - the selection by birthday isnn't necessarily correct. Again of course if it is the norm then of course it is less of a problem.

When we've talked about these things with the headmaster before when we've had problems with our children at school it seems that behavioral issues are often to do with the frustration of being at the wrong level, either to high or loo low. Part of the solution was for the teacher to find extra materiel in the subjects where they got through the work quickly

Good luck - it's not always fun this stuff

My middle daughter was kept back in a lower class at primary school due to large class sizes. They split the class on age and conveniently the next child above her in age who went up a class, also happened to have a School Governor as a parent (I'm not bitter about it though) 👿

I wouldn't worry. Due to my birthday (19th September, all large expensive presents gratefully received) I was kept in the same class for two years. I think I was 8 at the time. As a result I knew what was being taught and it embedded more. Especially repeating the times tables! It's not a mark of being thick or owt at that age.

I'm a teacher although secondary, I would think from your discription that his problems are not necessarily educational and so keeping him back a year may not help. If I were you I'd procede with caution and try to see an educational psychologist

I wouldn't have a kid kept down a year unless he was majorly behind or a bit lacking.

I think there's the potential that the boredom of repeating what will seem like very easy work will bring on bad behaviour.

he's got 10 more years of school anyway, what's the problem with one more?

Ask him when he's 15.

It has always seemed like a bad idea to me.

We've had an unusual (rough) year 5 with our son, some targetted bullying by a classmate came to a head, and school became concerned about Josh to the point where an ed psych opinion was sought due to autistic spectrum concerns; in short, the assessment showed nothing but the written report alludes to dyslexia, but no follow on planned. One good point, he will be on a prolonged transfer to high school, as per SEN kids despite no SE needs, meaning he is more familiar with the high school than other year 7's.
He is joint oldest in the year and academically does well, but according to his teacher he fails to recognise that he is cleverer than a lot of his mates.
I'm not sure that keeping your son back a year would be detrimental, but as a parent I'd be very keen to know what evidence has caused school to make this decision.

I'd be very keen to know what evidence has caused school to make this decision.

disagree with this, there is never going to be much evidence it's about judgement. As a parent i think you will know if there is sense to what they are suggesting.

The problem with holding a bright child back a year is that if they don't get their rewards from the school system - bear in mind they are bright, and they'll be repeating work they've already done....they'll become bored, fed-up, it's too damn eay, and seek their rewards from the subculture. Which means they'll not be sufficiently challenged and piss about.

It could work if you can find him something to challenge him outside of school.

I speak as an ex teecha!!!