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So if I understand the situation correctly, your friend has split with her partner/husband of 15 years and wants him to move out of there house something he is loathe to do (understandably if you ask me). Why is it an issue that she wants to leave him for another woman? If she were leaving him for another man would you have bothered posting?
Being a gossip-Queen I can see where Elaine is coming from. It doesn't get much juicier than this!
i HATE judemental people
including yourself ?
Live like you want to live
(but try not to bollocks up other folk too much while you are doing it)
What advice are you actually looking for?
Has she turned, based on what you've posted?
I don't get what the "problem" is?
Not meaning to sound judgemental, I just don't get it...
Not meaning to sound judgemental, I just don't get it...
I wouldn't worry too much, here's another gem..
[url= http://www.singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/estate-agent-postage ]clicky[/url]
😉
No offence elaine, but you do have an 'interesting' style.
Yes, it's no "big deal" being gay but coming out IS a big deal - your friends form a picture of you based on your past behaviour and if you suddenly come out (and it is sudden, to them at least) then you break the picture that they have built of you over so long.
Because the person themselves has spent quite possibly all their life secretly dealing with their sexuality they think people will be able to deal with it straight away - they won't. They need a bit of time to rebuild the picture. Elaine might be trying to do this now...
I think what I'm trying to say (badly) is that I'm sure Elaine would be totally cool with someone she has always known to be gay. A person she always thought to be straight "turning" gay, however, is weird.
I know I certainly freaked out most of my friends but people who have only ever known me post the big day don't really think about it.
(Reasonable punctuation but utter rambling tosh)
Rachel
It must be the hardest thing 'an Elephant' to face doing yet once its done a weight off ones mind?
I hate pigeon-holing people 'oh that gay guy Stuart'? Or.... 'well Stuarts gay so he might know' etc.
Local too, which is convenient.
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@hora - yes, it is. 🙂
The "oh Stuart's gay - he'll know" type things are fine - no different to "Rachel rides bikes, she'll know what bike to get on C2W..."
Oh and you're right - that's a cracking restaurant.
I remember a Waiter coming up to us and looking at me quizically (not eyeing me up - you could see he was trying to fathom if I 'was' or 'not') 😆
If he wasn't eyeing you up, why would he care??? 😉
I think he was trying to figure why I was in there on Valentines day with a girl (bet he thought she was my straight best friend') 😆
i'm struggling with the concept of a gay restaurant
is any food particularly gay?
I don't think a woman can eat prawn tacos without being gay...
i'm struggling with the concept of a gay restaurantis any food particularly gay?
Exactly the same concept as a gay bar, it's where gay people can go and act freely without scorn from others, although they are not exclusive to gay people, fag hags and fruit flies are also welcome.
😉
hora: "I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, a gay bar!" :o)
is any food particularly gay?
Cottage Pie?
and fruit flies
Repulsive types if I gather what you mean. Those who have their hen doo's etc down canal street laughing and pointing. Treating it as a 'interesting' visit to a 'Zoo'.
No, I like Eden as its actually a good restaurant with bloody good service.
No one is going to sprinkle gay dust into your food and the Chef at your local McDonalds could also be gay. Scary huh.
Repulsive types if I gather what you mean. Those who have their hen doo's etc down canal street laughing and pointing. Treating it as a 'interesting' visit to a 'Zoo'.
Nah, fruit flies is a slang term for straight people who socialise and are friends with gay people.
SFB, I've only ever been to one strip bar.
It was a gay stripbar. I went with two female colleagues when I worked in London on a night out. We were wandering around our usual haunts in Soho and one piped up 'lets go in here'!
hora - Member
SFB, I've only ever been to one strip bar.It was a gay stripbar. I went with two female colleagues when I worked in London on a night out. We were wandering around our usual haunts in Soho and one piped up 'lets go in here'!
Wow!! How cerazy!!!
And let's not forget Bingo. Not everyone has a gay/bi-curious dog
Hes my pit-westie. A figtin' Terrier 😯
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I'd love to help but I'm not overly sure what the question was?
Some people are bisexual. Does that help? Alternatively, some gay people may feel the need to have a straight relationship due to peer / social pressure and expectation?
Friend of mine has two kids, an ex-husband and an ex-long-term-boyfriend, and is currently living with a woman. I don't think there was any 'change' involved, she just fancies people rather than men or women.
My friend's dad came out when she was 21, came as quite a surprise to the whole family, including her mother. Some people try and hide it for years.
Nice.
(Not in a nice way).
I friend of mine who is not gay but she had a close friend who is and it quite butch came out with a revelation to her that she was in love with her and always has been, now my friend has a boyfriend and split up from her husband last year. Why her gay friend had to tell her she loved her is beyond me all at the cost of a good friendship go figure.
...because if she never said it she'd never know if the feeling was mutual or not?
hora speaks sense. How is that any different from all the straight people who make a friendship awkward by professing their desire/love for a friend? Isn't that how a lot of relationships get started?
I can't count how many people I know had friendships go wrong because or the other of the people said they'd like to be more than friends. Course, I know a lot of people who got the answers they hoped for.
Why her gay friend had to tell her she loved her is beyond me all at the cost of a good friendship go figure.
surely we need more love not less ? Loving someone does not obligate them to reciprocate...
Loving someone does not obligate them to reciprocate...
I know - it's a pain, isn't it???
Rachel
There was a programme on telly the other day about older women discovering they like women after all.
Rather common it seems.
WHY must it signal the end to a friendship though? Does it really repulse the other person? Or was the friendship more one-sided anyway?
I know - it's a pain, isn't it???
well, yes, heartache I suppose, but I wouldn't want anything other than wholehearted participation [BTW this is my current situation, and meanwhile someone else wants me and I cannot reciprocate]
no i dont have anything bad to say about gays at all.... you're all reading into this wrong... i just find it strange that ive known this woman quite a number of years (but she always has been quiet (in a wierd way) and as a couple with her long term parner (they never did alot of things together as a couple much (he would just prefur to sit around indoors , other neighbours have remarked in the past that they seem an 'Odd couple'..
you would normally know your friends inside out (but our friendship is is a neighbourly friendship so not as close (as a best friend .comprende .... however her relationship turns out im ok with that -im not saying its a tradgedy and wrong at all !!!! just a little confused that she does tend to keep things bottled up and feels she cant talk to me after ive 'neighbourly known' her for quite number of years..
Elaine, how [b]are[/b] we supposed to interpret your "("s ? I find them confusing as they seem to imply parenthesis which never completes...
Atlas said: I know a lot of people who got the answers they hoped for.
I had to be very drunk but worked for me
SFB, ever tried it? Even as a kid? you know when we all experimented/learned about ourselves?
SFB, ever tried it? Even as a kid?
as it happens, no - lack of imagination perhaps, or maybe I'm just a sexist pig and don't really like most men much ?
[i]Elaine, how are we supposed to interpret your "("s ? I find them confusing as they seem to imply parenthesis which never completes...[/i]
I like it (you should open your mind to the evolving punctuation.
I like it (you should open your mind to the evolving punctuation
I'm all in favour of that but I would like a clue as to the supposed meaning 🙂 I'm wondering if they're just typos ?
you frirst Hora How good a kisser is Binners?
I've experimented with the right parenthesis alot in my younger days. I considered dabbling with left parenthesis too, but it just never really did it for me enough to get involved.
you frirst Hora How good a kisser is Binners?
And did he swallow?