My Dad died last year aged 58 after a 6 month, rather one-sided 'fight' with the bully that is bowel cancer. http://greenflash74.blogspot.com. What have you done to help get over that 1st anniversary? Was thinking of riding the west highland way or something equally stupid, in the name of Macmillan.
I phoned an old ansaphone that still had his voice.
I completely ignore the anniversary of my Dad's death. Why would I want to remember the day he died? It was a really crap day for me. To be honest I've no idea what it is, October somewhere.
Nah. Now his birthday, I remember that, and father's day, that too.
On my dad's birthday last year, me, my son and our dog walked up Kinder to where his plaque is and we remembered the good times. **** the day he died.
Yes, it's his Birthday that's approaching on the 16th March.
Well done mate, hearty congrats for being so positive.
Cancer is an utter, utter bastard - celebrate your dad's life, do your ride and please, please, remember to look after yourself.
Seem to remember I just sat on the floor and smoked for the first year.
Not a good approach, really.
Double post.
But I'll say it again, look after yourself.
Aye, Sorry. I see the title now. Silly me.
Its my birthday today, well maybe yesterday (26th). I lost both my parents to cancer, my father following my mother within a couple of years. My dad died on my mums birthday... And my vaqueness is like samuri posted is that its more important to me to remember the birth and the life not the death(my dads elderly sister was shocked when on the 1st anniversary of my dads death she called asking me if i knew what day it was and i said 'yes my mums birthday'. So on both birthdays my family do something my parents loved. My mum a cream tea, my dad a fish supper.
But thats all easy to say. I still spent a day wishing i could have my mum call just once more and make me cringe as she sung happy birthday. I promise you though, it gets easier. And please do not dwell on the sad but remember the happy things. In all you do your parents are there with you.
I'm asking myself a similar question. On the 28/02 it will be the 27th anniversary of meeting my late partner. Somehow, I feel I will be celebrating her memory, but not by having to do some 'heroic' deed.
Superfinlay, you can raise funds for good causes at any time of year. The causes don't give a toss about dates.
'Anniversaries' are personal, intimate, private even. Celebrate them how you wish, but never feel under pressure (even from yourself) to do anything big.
Good point Trampus, i do tend to put myself under pressure, to for example raise money for charity. Whereas the day would be much better spent (for our own health) as a Family, by celebrating something meaningful with a healthy rememberance.
I tend to go and spend the day by myself climbing a hill or having an adventure.
The first year and all the special dates that come along with it are dreadful to cope with.
Do whatever you feel up to and then treat yourself to a gift.
I still talk to my Father when things are a bit iffy in life. The one thing I really miss is his valued, experienced opinion on things.
My mums birthday is coming up in the middle of March. The day will also mark three months since her death from Cancer. Not sure what I'll be doing on the day although I have booked it off work; somehow I don't think I'll be up to it.
Seeing as she loved gardening I'll probably spend a few hours in the garden trying to tidy it up. Spent some time in the garden this weekend attempting to prune stuff and do some weeding. I'm probably making a bit of a hash of it but I like to think that I'm trying to care for the things she loved.
Seeing as she loved gardening
my mum too. quite often on her birthday we will go to the garden centre and buy something fun and a bit different to grow. generally it will be fruitish and edible.
another one here too wondering what to do. My dad just died of Cancer Christmas just gone, and it is/would be his birthday tomorrow 🙁
I'm going to go for a ride around the area I grew up, where I remember my first (off road) ride with him.
Long distance ride is a good idea. My dad rode from London (where he lived) to Lands end in his teens (on a tank of a bike with no gears, as he would like to point out numerous times) so I was thinking of doing that.
I jut took my little girls down to where his ashes are buried and let them play.
Just had to do it for a second year and it hasn't really got any easier. Although me and my brother were discussing it on Saturday night in the pub and have agreed that, day-to-day, things are getting a bit easier than they were - but anniversaries are tough.