This is mine, this morning:
...which managed to go straight in one sidewall and out of the other leaving at least an inch on either side, causing this to happen:
Mudguard fail by kiteless, on Flickr
Shame I didn't take a pic of it in situ, but I wanted to make the bike rollable for the walk back home!
Anyone managed something bigger?
Managed to get a 26" rim stuck in mine!
IGMC
I once had a bolt go staight through both sides of my tyre as well - not sure how as it wasn't sharp like that screw. Only had patches with me and the holes were massive so that was a walk home for me....
If someone could post the photo of the guy faceplanting his front tyre I'd be very grateful!
3" nail off road
2" chipboard screw on road - went through the RIM!
NOt on my MTB but had the metal end of a Parker type pen go through the rear tyre on my R1 and took a perfect core of rubber with it and left a hole big enough to get my finger in. When I had the tyre changed the guy gave me back the end of the pen and the piece of rubber! Needless to say the tyre went down pretty much straight away - it was only about 500 miles old too and £130 quid for a new one as it couldn't be repaired.
Crikey that's impressive Simon!
Impressive!
Best I managed was this:
Had a 5" nail go through at 90 degrees to the frame whilst riding down a hill - almost jumped out of my skin with the noise it made as it started hitting the drop outs with each revolution.
Amazingly it didn't mark the paint on the drop outs.
Does this count?
A rather large lump of dogpoo. No, I didn't take a picture of it.
I managed to get a nail about the same size in my fold up commuter too.
Luckily I wasnt going as fast as you so I didnt damage the mudguards, my wheel just kinda stopped spinning.
Once had a 5 inch by 1 inch bit of plastic car bumper stick in a tyre. Deflation was so rapid that I felt it on my leg as it wooshed out
What the flip is that?!
What the flip is that?!
Don't know but it looks as if he has snakeskin tyres 
It looks like coral.
What the flip is that?!
Some sort of sealant crystal type thing. It was rubbery and a little bouncy.
Have a look
http://www.singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/anyone-seen-this-before-1
And they're conti rubber queens.
I rode into a cow on the Garth mountain yesterday - does that count? (It was misty, I was going head down, hell for leather into a headwind....). Luckily, the cow was extremely placid and laid back about it and just carried on chewing (or at least it was when I looked back to see if it was chasing me).
a bird...
If someone could post the photo of the guy faceplanting his front tyre I'd be very grateful!
If somebody could google faceplanting his front tyre he would find it 3 entries down.
Fully inflated 29er inner tube in mine at the moment!
Thats pretty large! Especially as it fills a 2.4" tyre. Rim and wheel are quite big too!
And I can't be bothered working out how many litres of air are in there but I am sure it must be well over 100 litres per tyre. 
a 2" metal tube broken off a stinger
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