I have a friend from Hawaii who has another friend who keeps trying his hand at running restaurants, but invariably fails before too long. Anyway, I just had breakfast at his latest place and he was kind enough to provide a helping of fried spam complements of the house. I really tried my best to politely refuse, but bloody Hawaiians think it’s like caviar or something. Disgusting vile stuff. This same thing happens to me about every five years, then I forget and get sloppy and end up in the same situation again where I have to choose between shutting up and eating the awful stuff or offending people. I think from now on I’m just going to tell them straight up that they shouldn’t be serving that garbage to humans.
I just can’t understand how you could take pig meat, add salt, and not wind up with something as delicious as bacon. Why don’t Hawaiians just make bacon their national dish instead. Then people might start liking the bloody cuisine.