OK, for those of you, like me, who may be confined to barracks with the imminence of child, we have a situation.

I have been lead to believe by female colleagues that it is now de rigeur for women who have recently given birth to be presented with a push present from the father.

Now, Mrs North has just discovered the baby is breech (feet down) and so is going for what a friend delicately describes as a "cut and shut" on Thursday.

In spite of there being no pushing now required, I'd like to buy her something small to remind her that, though she will now be housebound for weeks and unable to drive a car for a month or two, I love her.

Any suggestions?

"It’s more and more an expectation of moms these days that they deserve something for bearing the burden for nine months, getting sick, ruining their body. The guilt really gets piled on."[1] Other sources trace the development of the present to the increased assertiveness of women, allowing them to ask for a present more directly, or the increased involvement of the men in pregnancy, making them more informed of the pain and difficulties of pregnancy and labor.[1]

Unbelievable!

Did you get a gift for shooting your load……………..

Something from the Tiffanys catalogue is always a winner!

Hey, listen, I'm not into all the commercialisaiton of bringing a life into the world. Just want to get the girl, who's had a horrendous 9 months (incl near-hospitalisation in the first 4 months) something to say thanks.

Spud – was thinking a bit more low-key than Tiffs..!

Is the gift of your newborn not enough?

Turbo trainer?

What is that? A cordless coffee filter hammer drill combo?

Just being there to help out will be the best present.

If your that keen to say thanks, buy her a bresat pump then she can express and you can stay up all night feeding baby, that will be better to her than any present!

It shouldn't be 2 months before she's driving again, my wife started after 3 weeks.

Is the gift of your newborn not enough?

She'll think so. So do I. But I intend to buy her something small.

It is unlikely we'll have any more kids – this pregnancy has been so hard, and there may well be issues with the baby (it's very small, apparently). I just want something to remind Mrs North that it's all been worthwhile.

It shouldn't be 2 months before she's driving again, my wife started after 3 weeks.

Sounds good. Am hoping it will be the same for her. TBH, I'm more concerned how she'll get up and down the stairs – they're like the north face of the Eiger.

Maybe I'll get her some crampons.

no idea's about present but good luck with it all, I'll be in the same boat come end of october…

Good luck anagallis…!

How about one of those litter grabbers, she'll at least be able to pick nappies and wipes off the floor then! 😉 Our son came through what he calls Mummy's magic zip, so I can sympathise with being laid up for 6 weeks or so.. good luck with it!!

Did you get a gift for shooting your load……………..

Saving money on bikes and beer.

from Wiki "The giving of push presents has grown in the United States in recent years"

Why am I not surprised?

Good luck with the birth anyway!

What about one of those charm bracelets that you can get from the jewelery section in Index or Argos?
You can buy little trinkets to add to it each birthday. You can't really nick them as they're under the counter in a glass case – I think they might be silver. The first one could be the birth stone of the month the baby is born and then buy another one on the baby's first birthday which could be the sign of the zodiac for August and then for the next few years you could go with whatever Chinese year it is.
You'd have to have a think by the time the baby was 11 years old or something as I don't know what you'd go for after that but the bracelet would be immense by then (quite literraly).

Hello – it's Mrs MM (hijacking Mr MM's username!)

I know it's not something that your wife can keep for ever… but what about arranging for lovely relaxing massage (or series of). If you speak to a good holistic therapist they with be able to recommend what sort of treatment bearing in mind she will have just had surgery. You should be able to sort out a home visit as well

just a thought

Send her for acupuncture – 80% success rate of turning breech babies, and then no need for the Ceaser. Ceasers are bad. Major surgery and best avoided.

If she doesn't need anything (which it sounds like), how about donating some money to UNICEF?

xtr cranks

It will all pale into insignificance next to the screaming bundle of joy that the birth will bring. If she doesn't know you love her and you don't feel closer at that moment than at any time before, then a trinket is never going to make anything different anyway.

Some "mum" time is always a good thing – massage, manicure, pedicure, decent haircut (don't buy a pair of clippers & tell her to get on with it). Maybe a course of post-natal yoga – time for her to relax, although she may not want to leave the baby for long. If you're looking to save pennies, home made gifts could be a nice touch – voucher for an evening off, complete with bath oils, decent meal (not Dominoes!), vino (she can pump & dump if breast feeding). Unless she has any brand preferences already (i.e buys swanky stuff herself) beauty products (lotions, potions, nice smelly thing) from Space NK, Dr Hauschka or Caudalie are great & make you feel a million dollars. Best of luck for the birth!

I had a lovely pair of purple ano pedals after the birth of my youngest in '92 and I haven't stopped pimpin' since 😉

it may turn around still. our 1st did with 2 days to go, was a weird sight watching some little alien push and literally turn the right way up in front of our eyes..didn't half make Mrs FMH feel proper sick whilst it was turning though.. that sight still ranks as one of my top ten besterest/weirdest sights in my life.
didnt even get my mrs flowers, i rewarded her with some time off from me the next day as i went surfing…you have to start as you mean to go on..!

oh yeah, best of luck anyhow…

I have nothing to suggest in the way of presents, anything I'd suggest (a virtual stranger) would I'm certain be entirely wrong. But I'll offer my heartfelt wishes that it all goes as smoothly as possible for Mrs OMITN.

Packet of condoms?

A Road Bike ?

tummy tuck op?

Tell her you won't be making sexual demands on her for the next 6 months.

But it would be unwise to mention the alternative arrangement you have made. 🙂

For my first born I was told by her mate to bring her heaps of flowers. Being of a practical nature, I thought she'd prefer the money, so I gave her that instead. Had to buy the flowers as well. Big fail and I'm still not allowed to forget it.

Basically anything that helps her feel feminine should do the trick.

Seriously though, good luck. It may be a routine procedure, but it's never easy for the mother.

I'd tell her you're going to get snipped. No more pregnancy worries and whilst not the same as giving birth it's not a pleasent experience. You may even be in line for a snip pressie.

Personal trainer vouchers! Woman next door had them.

Mrs B has had a ring for each significant event
1- Engagament
2- Wedding
3- Birth
They all interlock and she wears them all together

I didn't give my wife anything – she likes the baby so she's happy.

Cheers all – some good amd some not good suggestions. Entirely typical of STW.

I love you all and will be back in touch as soon as I know if it's a boy or a girl.

Exciting..!

PS Tried to turn it thrre times yesterday – so it's deffo on for a caesarean.

No2 Son head was never "engaged" he was doing somersaults right up to the day he was born. So you never know.

Good luck.

B

Centrifuge?

A book?

Good luck Tom and MrsTom.

I'm hopeless at presents though, so won't suggest anything 🙂

OMITN, get her one of these:

http://www.medela.co.uk/UK/breastfeeding/products/swing.php

to express milk with. And some freezer bags to go with it.

Then, with bottled mum's milk you can offer to do various feeds that otherwise she would have to do. Gives her a chance of getting sustained sleep instead of broken fits of unconsciousness. I give Jr MkII a late feed (11ish) so Mrs S can go to bed early (9ish) and not be disturbed for a good 6 hours or so.