Christmas and birthday are coming and people are asking what I want.

Can anybody recommend a maintenance book for MTB/CX that is suitable for an impulsive idiot with a short attention span? Something easy to follow with lots of pictures would be ideal.

Park Tools one is pretty good. I've heard the Zinn one recommended too but not got it.

There's the Park Tools Big Blue Bumper Book Of Bike maintenance, but to be honest, It might be a bit outdated and really for your 'Halfrauds' type 'o' bike, not that there's owt wrong with Halfrauds bikes*

You'd be better off finding out about it online.

What about asking Santa for some nice new Formula RX's?

*There is, they're crap, but I'm not going to say that here in fear of being shot down, sh1t…

There's the Park Tools Big Blue Bumper Book Of Bike maintenance, but to be honest, It might be a bit outdated and really for your 'Halfrauds' type 'o' bike, not that there's owt wrong with Halfrauds bikes*

They just brought out a new edition, and it has eg extensive sections on bleeding different brands of disc brake. Personally when I'm covered in grease I'd rather have a book than try and use a laptop.

Park Big Blue book, although that is all available online here-

http://www.parktool.com/repair/

As for out of date, the site has Pike and Monarch services on there.

You'd be better off getting a workstand (if you've not got one) or Sealskinz or a CO2 inflator or something.

I already have a workstand and a vast selection of exotic and unused tools.

I've got the Zinn book – it's basic enough for a numpty like me but suspect it's not going to offer anything new to anyone that knows what they're up to, to any degree.
That said, it works for me and I have managed to work through quite a few little jobs with its help.
I do refer to the park tools website occasionally too.

I've also got the Park Big Blue book and it's been a godsend in the past.

If you want to pinnacle of bike manuals – http://www.bbinstitute.com/manual.htm 😉