I have an adopted tom cat, complete with balls. He was intermittently very aggressive, very scared and very friendly when I first took him in. I found some of the causes were a mix of these:
- He expected to be attacked by other cats and by humans, so he very easily misinterpreted some gestures and tried to 'defend' himself.
- All cats sometimes have bites we can't see under their fur (I find this with my other cats) and if we brush them unseen, it hurts the cat esp if they are infected (many bites heal on their own, but it takes a few days just as our injuries do). If you brush the damaged area, the cat, unsure if to trust you, may take it as an attack and think you are hurting him rather than the wound causing the problem - so he will defend himself.
- My stray turned out to be quite ill with some kind of bowel condition that caused him to eat masses frantically or very little. He got very bad stomach upsets which caused him a lot of pain and you could hear his stomach rumbling at times. Sometimes he though a gut pain was caused by me touching him and again, we got the defence reaction. We got him checked by the vet and they tested him for various things but in the end it stabilised by giving him low grade cat food and once a day some shredded chicken (you can get it in cans). Be aware your new pet may be ill in some way that is not clear to you yet.
- He was very insecure and would fawn over you if you walked towards the house and bite and scratch your feet if you walked away as he was scared he would be deserted again (he lived wild for over a year, through a very cold snowy winter).
Now his health has improved and he has learned we do not hurt him intentionally, he has turned into the most lovely natured cat, much liked by visitors to the house. He is very affectionate and friendly and now loves to be cuddled. I found it helped to be firm with him when he was trying to herd me back towards the house and to always make it clear who was boss. Being angry when he was ill and responded aggressively though would be pointless at it just re-confirms a belief he is being attacked and will prolong the problem.
He still has his balls as his stomach problem has been a long time sorting as has building up his trust and I don't want to cause more problems at this point by getting them removed. People say Toms are aggressive but it is not true, he is at the lowest point of the pecking order in the house as the 3 neutered Toms all keep him well in line.
Another useful thing to know is that some cats bite when being affectionate. This usually is gentle and gets toned down to 'human scale' so its more gentle mouthing but if you cat is edgy, be aware he may also misjudge this and bit a bit too hard, though intending to be loving, until he learns to scale back a bit.
Its taken us a year to get to where we are with our stray but its well worth the effort. Gradually his attacks became much lower key and it became clear they were becoming a 'warning' rather than an attack and he often looked guilty if he got cross with us. It occurred to me that as he had a dodgy background, maybe he did not know a less assertive way of saying 'I dont want you to do that' and so that has added to the problem. He is now at the point where he will push your hand away gently with his paw if he does not want to be stroked as he has learned we respect this.
Ours has been well worth the time effort and occasional fits of seeming hostility from the cat. He is lovely now.
It helps to think of how a very young child unable to speak and that was abused in some way might react, as many animals that have had hard times are more or less in that position and much of the psychology is very similar - fear, need for affection, not knowing how to get the result or love that it wants, over reaction etc.
