Certain Depot’s I’ve worked in seem to have a “spray n pray” trap policy along with a “crap n run” policy.

An them I’m accused of being an animal when I crap in the bushes trackside after my IBS plays up.

Always remember a sign on the back of a toilet door in a ski resort in Andorra…

“Always check before you commit”

Was meant to be a warning to skiers to check up the hill, but was very relevant in this situation!

I’ll see your shipyard and raise you two weeks in a Chinese paper mill.

Pfft.

Bike shop traps.

I finished my business, did the paperwork and left before walked to the other side of the room, pulled out my phone and recorded the reaction as the person next door realised the true horror of their situation and then uploaded it to youtube for you to watch and giggle at.

would have been a more entertaining post….

#schadenfreude

I had exactly the same situation happen to me years ago. I realised that the preferred trap was out of toilet roll, so moved to the middle of the 3 traps.

As I was cleaning up, I heard somebody enter the trap I had declined to use, and unload. Just as I was finishing up, they realised what they had done, and I heard a meek voice say “hello is anybody there, can you pass me some toilet roll?”.

I recognised his voice, but I believe that it is a human right to keep your identity secret from the person in the next trap, so I just legged it.

Did you time at the coffee machine not provide an excellent opportunity to observe the sheepish air of someone departing the local area, whilst providing a cast iron alibi for loitering?

Bike shop traps.

The shop I worked in had rat crap in the cludgy.

Don’t shake hands with any men in the office this afternoon

It wasn’t the state of the gents at the last place I worked at that resulted in a sternly worded email being sent around the whole company…

I’m crying here! 😆 Cant beat a good poo related post!!

Brilliant, reminds me of my risk assessment and method statement for doing a poo in company toilets.

After a long spell of endlessly churning out RAMS, I did one for bowel movements, it included risks like finger poke, splash back, lack of paper and so on,

The Ms required one to assess consistency of stools prior to ejection, assess paper quantity and quality as well as tensile strength.

Oh how I laughed as I inserted it into the suite of RAMS that were distributed for the next few years until I left.

It was discovered some years later by the bloke who took my job on, who apparently left it in for a bit longer before sadly removing it.

Nobody read crap like that in those days but I saw it as a genuine risk.

the traps are like Bobby Sands potting shed

coffee keyboard