Hi all. Since becoming a dad for the first time 2 years ago, as expected my riding time has diminished. Also no longer go to the gym / yoga classes due to wanting to get home for bathtime/ bedtime. I’ve got into the bad habit of having a beer or glass of wine most evenings, eating chocolate every day and getting lazy at weekends and not getting up to ride and am now touching 82kg when my weight when riding on / off road regularly was 70kg. I’m guessing this is not an uncommon issue, but I’m just not enjoying feeling unfit and conscious of my weight. Wondered if anyone had any similar experiences and advice they could share. I was touching 80 miles a week on average before and it seems impossible now to get back to that level of activity.

I can’t personally but I have a few friends who race who managed. When you can’t get quantity, get quality.

Weight is a hard one – you just have to eat less and cut out all the stuff you could have before because you burned it off.

can’t talk from experience of fatherhood, but from being time crunched i drive to work then ride home, get up at 6 and ride the 40km to work, drive home that evening having left the van at work the night before, maybe not the same thing, but mornings are valuable if they can be used constructively

I started running. Did the early feed, pulled my trainers on and went out for 30 mins. I’d never run before and I was amazed how the weight fell off. It also helped with the lack of sleep too.

I still run a little now in the winter (7 years on), but it was only ever an interim measure.

Good luck!

Yeah it can happen and I definitely can relate to wanting to get back home and being around instead of going to the gym etc (13 month old here).

I’ve managed to stay around a constant weight over the last year and a bit, but I’m not as bike-fit as I was and that’s just the result of having more going on. As others have said, being pretty careful with the diet is important and yeah, you know about the booze, chocolates and bad habits, which is probably the big thing with the actual weight.

For exercise, I run to work and back (dead time otherwise) and run with the pushchair. I don’t really like running, but it fits in. I also bought a £70 rower off Gumtree for the garage, which has been a bit of a winner for half hour bursts (if a bit dull).

You seem to be clued up on what your bad habits are, you’ll sort it quickly – 82kgs ain’t that bad 😉

Running is the answer much more time efficient than cycling and a lot less faff.

Or is cycling to work an option ?

Got to 80kg as a ‘new’ dad before I really knew ‘something must be done’.

Get the My Fitness Pal app if you have a smartphone. Get scales to weigh yourself if you don’t have them already.

If you can use My Fitness Pal then set yourself a sensible weight loss goal, say 0.5kg-1kg per week. This will likely set your calorie intake to about 1500 kcal per day. Eat the same breakfast every day. Make it up to 1/3 of your daily allowance.

Eat no snacks between meals. This can be tough at first but soon you get disciplined. Eventually you can slack off as long as you record the stuff you eat. Tesco Jam Doughnut? No problem but that’s about 200 kcal you can’t now eat at dinner.

Eat a modest lunch. Soup and banana. Half a sandwich and an apple. That sort of thing.

For dinner, really control your portion size. If your calorie allowance permits, have a glass of wine. Stop with one.

Weigh in every week. Just once.

Be conservative with your assessment of exercise if you’re using the app. Exercise gives you more freedom with your calories but it is easy to break the discipline.

After about 40 days of complete discipline you’ll feel and see the difference. Then just keep it up.

I’ve found snacking, drinking (beer), and cocktails really create problems. You have to be disciplined until you see the reward. Then it gets easier.

Cheers all. I commute to London from Southampton 2-3 days a week and work from our local office or home the rest. We are a one car family so my wife uses the car in the week. Manage about 16 miles of commuting on a good week. Running is a tricky one as I have a long history of knee issues from flat feet. Thinking it may. E worth a few £ seeing a specialist and getting them to tell me how to condition myself to run again.

Oh, running is good. Though you can have less pain and almost as much effect with quick walking. Running is painful and boring IMO.

I have a 3 year old and a 5 month old and running, riding to work and a turbo have? worked for me.
I enjoy running, though, and even liked cross country at school.

Heart rate monitor, Strava recording device, 3-5 days per week linking up local hills for ~60mins (hammer the hills, recover on the flatter links). Zone 3 or even 4 up the climbs.

This was me back in January, after not riding at all for ~7 weeks during a cold that hung on for dear life, having done very little riding besides commuting ~27 miles per week from June 2016. My general fitness has been nothing better than mediocre since ~2004, which got worse after my lower back injury in 2008 and my Xmas 2013 RTA, along with increasing from ~76Kg to at worst ~92Kg last summer.

I’ve gone from rides like https://www.strava.com/activities/858401134 to rides like https://www.strava.com/activities/1004831261 and https://www.strava.com/activities/1019331838

I’m probably fitter now than in 2004, have been as low as 76Kg, but raiding the fridge and cupboards after intensive 20+ mile rides means I’m now ~78Kg.

I’m in the same boat as you OP. Three year old, number two on the way and getting fatter by the day!

Calories in calories out etc

Except that’s not true- lack of sleep affects your hormones and your blood sugar, which affects how you metabolise food and what you crave

As tough as it is, getting a good 7 hrs is important

Being organised, planning meals, weekly night ride, as much sleep as possible!

2 year old and 4 week old.

With 1 kid it wasn’t that bad, get up early and turbo. I am currently doing my best to hold onto some fitness. I am seriously thinking about taking up running. Which I really don’t like….

I’m 2 years in – my fitness has yoyo’d quite a lot in that time but steady & getting better now. I don’t have the time to build / keep fitness by “just riding” like I used to. I travel a lot for work too – I’ve found the Sufferfest iphone app a godsend. I can keep my mtb fitness ticking over with 1 or 2 of those a week combined with a gym session. So when I do get a good chance to ride (like this weekend) I can go for it.

The other thing – no two families have the same circumstances. Just cause your mate with 3 kids can ride all the time doesn’t mean I can or should. I’m still struggling to get the right balance between being a bastard and family. I probably wasn’t enough of a bastard for a while, so kept cancelling rides or plans because of one reason or another. On the other hand I don’t enjoy a ride if I know I’ve left an unhappy house.

Family has always taken priority for me. 2 year old in bed, I’m on shift with #2 till 4am then taking #1 to nursery for 7.30 tomorrow. About to try an hour on the turbo…

Get a turbo, report for duty in the Zwift thread.
Sorted!

garage, turbo, zwift (unless you’re really motivated, in which case just the first 2)

(Edit: Bah, as ever someone’s faster than me 🙁 )

3 months after my first was born (11 years ago) it was obvious I wasn’t going to get to the gym again. As others have said – running, very little prep needed, low cost as we’ve all got shorts and a t-shirt but worth investing in decent shoes. Don’t have to drive anywhere as it’s straight out your front door.

Got a cheap kettlebell and follow the HASfit workouts on YouTube, also tried Insanity but too long at an 1h 30m so now do T25 – same thing but in 25mins and only need a rug sized area.

Blow your nuts off on every ride!

I lost 2 stone when my first one came along as suddenly I had less time to cycle than before so I would hammer and tong every ride, even if I was commuting to work. Find the hills and chase the Strava segments (I know, I know…) for motivation. There were 5 decent segments on my commute either way, and I’d have a crack at them most days, so it became intervals.

I’ve now got a 4 year old and an 18 month old and I’ve reigned in the gut busting riding as the purpose has kind of been served now, but sensible eating and not drinking much has meant I have been able to keep my weight down.

Good luck!

Re eating between meals, I’d actually say make sure you do eat in between meals but make sure you plan so the snack you’ve got to hand is a good one. That way you won’t be tempted to reach for the donuts. The key is to not find yourself hungry other than at meal times. Snack on nuts and dried fruit or Ryvita and peanut butter, stuff like that. Myfitnesspal is excellent for calorie counting and staying within decent calorie limits.

Eat porridge for breakfast with some walnuts, honey and fruit on it. Low calorie but keeps you filled up for ages.

Interesting post OP. I could have written it almost word for word, except my kid is now 3, and I have a 1 year old also now.

Think a physical job in forestry is keeping my weight steady, but also rules out any calorie cutting. Suspect I won’t be as bike fit, especially as some of the guys I ride with are getting right on the training.

I mostly rock climbed before fatherhood but that’s a sport that takes a lot of time! It’s been an adjustment for me and I’ve had to experiment with all the sports that I can fit in rather than focus on the ones I can’t. I now do a short weights session twice a week and fit quick bike rides, runs and indoor climbing in when i can. I have a minimum target I want to hit for motivation and any extra is a bonus. I’m heavier but my all round strength is much better and, believe me you’ll need good lower back strength!

Btw my weights are done at 6.00 am

If you need motivation to ride more – remember your kids look up to interesting parents who do stuff rather than ones who give over their entire lives.

Being ‘selfish’ and taking a few more hours a week to make yourself fit and happy doing something you love also pays off for them too.

They can easily forgive a few missed bedtimes you know. You get the best part of two decades with them and having a hobby of your own you actively pursue is a fantastic example to set.

Unfortunately running is the answer. 6 month old and 3.5 year old year and despite best intentions exercise has taken a back seat. I can run at work so I do. It’s boring.

I started going to the gym before work- had no impact on family life. As the gym was walking distance from work I would also miss the traffic. This really helped my tiredness as well.

Loads of good advice here. Thanks all. Will check out myfitness app and possibly a turbo / swift although the thought of sitting on a bike in my garage makes my toes curl. Running would make a lot of sense, but having a mum who has had a double knee replacement at 62 makes me a little cautious at 37 when I’ve got existing problems. As far as home weights etc are concerned, motivation to do it at home is the problem when you are next to the tv and sofa.

I’ve got an 11-month old and am fitter and lighter than ever, so it’s possible but it requires an extra level of dedication to manage it. For me a long commute is key, but this may not work for your situation. You basically have to find a way to wedge in riding in the bits of time that you do have spare. That might mean a turbo trainer, as others have suggested. Turbo training makes it very easy to do focussed sessions, maximises the use of time, and means you are still at home if you are needed. My preference, however, is to get up stupidly early and get some road miles in before mini-qtip is awake. You could also do this after bedtime. On top of that, if my wife is out for the day/morning/afternoon with the baby at the weekend then I make sure I get some riding in.

Do you have space to make your garage a bit nicer? My turbo setup is in a converted garage. 32inch tv, ps3, firestick, 2 remote controlled fans, 2 mounts for tablets really good Bluetooth headphones. 10pm last night Had #2 boy asleep in his basket, #1 boy watched via baby monitor whilst I watched Vikings on prime. Sound of fan/turbo doesn’t seem to bother them. Didn’t cost that much in the scheme of things (less than the sofas…)

I have two young kids, and it can be tough. Getting time “for me” can be difficult, and sometimes you’re just too knackered to make the most of the time you do have.

For me fitness is matter of making the most of every opportunity. I walk the kids to nursery twice a week (carrying the young ‘un so it’s a bit of a workout); slot in pressups or yoga before work or before bed; and don’t sniff at getting a quick half hour on the bike before it gets dark, even if it’s just a 5km loop around the local woods. Even a brisk walk around the block at lunchtime makes a difference. Basically any chance you have for exercise, take it.

Getting a “proper” ride in is more difficult. Currently I’m having good results with an early ride at the weekend. Usually I let my wife lie in on one day, and on the other I use my lie-in token to head out on the bike before anyone is up. That way you’re back and done around the tail-end of breakfast and no-one misses you. It’s helpful when doing this to prepare well, partially to maximise riding time, but also to mentally commit to getting out riding when you’d probably sooner be in bed 🙂

I think it can be hard to go back to your old levels of activity, at least without serious dedication to the cause of doing so, but with some ingenuity you can achieve a good balance all the same.

2 young kids here. Kill the midweek booze. It’s the only way, it makes you lazy.

You won’t get as much time in to ride, mainly because it’s nice to be doing stuff with the little ones, especially when the weather is nice. I now ride far more in the winter which is a shame .

tomwoodbury – Member
Running is a tricky one as I have a long history of knee issues from flat feet. Thinking it may. E worth a few £ seeing a specialist and getting them to tell me how to condition myself to run again.

POSTED 16 HOURS AGO #
prettygreenparrot – Member
Oh, running is good. Though you can have less pain and almost as much effect with quick walking. Running is painful and boring IMO.

You should be able to run pain free with the right guidance. Most specialists will probably recommend a supportive shoe for ‘flat feet’, but that won’t fix the problem. How will your foot get stronger if its weakest part is supported?

I’ve been running for three years, since my daughter was born, as it is the most time efficient exercise, burns lots of calories and I can make use of mornings before work.

I’m only just learning how to run properly, I’d thoroughly recommend reading Born to Run by Christopher McDougall, and then The Cool Impossible by Eric Orton, if you want to run injury free.

The key is to learn proper technique and to build foot, leg and core strength. That way, when you run you are doing so with all muscles in equilibrium, no one muscle having to compensate for another.

I’ve had the same thing, less time for yourself, nursery pickups after work/ before work drop-offs, knackered all the time as there are no lie ins and by the time you’ve finished work, picked up, messed about a bit, done the bath story bed thing, then done dinner and clear up its 9pm and there’s stuff to do. wife is away with work a bit now and so that rules out riding/ getting out even when little burko is asleep in bed in the evening.

I gave up sugar before ours was born for a good few months but cracked after the birth as there was so much sweet stuff about the house and no sleep etc means you crave it, I still haven’t got back to that and its coming up 3 yrs. we’ve both been boozing more in the week for some reason, just a couple of glasses with food, it gets to be habit as you think you deserve it as you’re so knackered all the time.

the wife runs a bit and I ought to start I guess, never really been into it, prefer to be on a bike but bored of my local loops.

we also don’t put as much effort into cooking these days. we cook everything fresh rather than have a lot of packet stuff but are always on the back foot with preparing food these days which doesn’t help as you’re either starving, cooking or digesting a massive meal so you don’t fancy exercise.

we got a bike trailer – a second hand chariot and I did an old bike up for the wife. I take little un to nursery in the trailer 10 mile round trip offroad. that helps when I have the time and its not pi**ing down.

I guess if its important you just have to focus and get stuck in.

Get a Road bike…

The hardest part is often getting out the front door when you feel tired and knackered.. once you get moving its never that bad. Riding from your front door is key to getting outside biking in when you have young children.

Stop eating crap.
Seriously.. how will you be able to be a fit active and fun dad if you are waddling around stuffing sweets in your face.
Remember.. Your diet effects your weight..
Exercise effects your fitness.

Life’s to short to spend it fat and unfit.
Do something.

Great advice all round. I might have to resort to running myself although I don’t like it, so find motivation hard. Having a kid who hasn’t slept through the night in three years doesn’t help. Hope number two is a better sleeper.

As others have said it is the tiredness that does you in. I spend most days spaced out and have little to no energy. Joining a circuit class at a gym that’s walking distance from the house. Hoping that’ll be a good start.

They can easily forgive a few missed bedtimes you know. You get the best part of two decades with them and having a hobby of your own you actively pursue is a fantastic example to set.

This was a great bit of advice – while wife and i don’t do as much as we’d like we get in the odd bit of kayaking, open water swimming, riding etc.
The kids aren’t old enough to join in yet but are fascinated and always excited to see bikes or kayak going out.

As for weight – just think of it as gravity assist…

Same thing happened to me with our first child. Baby monitor in front of the turbo and some netflix was my solution (I’d now do Zwift but it wasn’t around at the time.) Worth thinking about some goals too, some events or races to work towards. I started doing some evening time trials with the local road club.

I started lifting weights again when I had kids.
I find that I can get a decent workout in in 45 to 60 mins.

I’m bigger, heavier (100kg) and stronger now than I was (fairly unsurisingly) but I generally get decent ride in each weekend, either on the gravel bike or with the kids (now aged 7 and 9) on the MTB.

As the kids get older, don’t think you’ll have more time, you’ll just end up taking them to more activities etc.