"A face like Dot Cotton licking piss off a nettle"

Best thing on TV this year.

+1

Grandma rolled that sayin many times – watched the 'bad lieutenant' with her once – didn't flinch for shit – her response too my nascent liberal blooing was 'i lived through the 2nd world war' – i slept easy…

It was his description of someone as an "omni-shambles" that had me laughing, genius!

"Kill a kid an hour until it sorts itself out?.."

last weeks 'in two shakes of a crying baby' was another classic

"I wouldn't piss on you if you were allergic to my piss"

He'll **** you harder than Ron Jeremy and with less warmth.

tickety f***ity boo

F*** f*** f*** missed it again. All hail the iPlayer.

Can't it go on at an obscure time on BBC4 like it used to be, then I'm more likely to be in and watch it?

"Come the f*** in, or f*** the f*** off"

(Though nothing is more amusing than Chris Langham's "I look like a disgraced geography teacher", which is essentially what he is….)

Longer than a Leonard Cohen song

Genius………….

"he couldn;t be uglier unless he had two heads"

I quite like his Glaswegian flunky and the greek chorus like effect of the abuse.

it was jamie who had the best line ever……….

"i will remove your ipod from its tiny nanosheath and push it up your cock then i'll put some speakers up ur arse and put it onto shuffle with my **** fist,? and everytime i hear something that i dont like, which will be everytime something comes on, i will skip to the next track by crushing your balls"

Is Jamie not in it this series?

Miss his Motherwell thuggery.

it was jamie who had the best line ever……….

"i will remove your ipod from its tiny nanosheath and push it up your cock then i'll put some speakers up ur arse and put it onto shuffle with my **** fist,? and everytime i hear something that i dont like, which will be everytime something comes on, i will skip to the next track by crushing your balls"

"If it isn't Humpty Dumpty, sitting on a wall like some clueless egg c*nt"

😆

"You look like you've just sh*t a lego castle"