In-ear headphones getting tangled up in my pocket.

Weetabix crumbs getting everywhere no matter how careful I am when getting the Weetabix out of the packet.

👿

vaccum cleaner hose.

Is it a sign of madness if you swear at the hoover and kick it when the hose gets all wound up and turns Henry over?

thought so.

The next poster.

Toast crumbs in bed…

Left hand drive cars being driven in london…

lounge music!

When petrol station goons stick the ‘8’ in upside down on the price signs.

You know when you drop something small and go to pick it up and it slips from your fingers and takes about three or four goes to actually pick it up again? That.

And when the tea bag flops back off the spoon and splashes tea everywhere.

The next poster.

Post reported! Bwahahahaha 😈

Your Mum…

The 3 second opera type soundbite for champions league footy – where they sing ‘the champions’ – **** hate it….. irrationally I know….

If it wasn’t so little, it wouldn’t annoy me 🙁

Or when you have a really tricky small nail to hammer in – you *just* get it in place and are about to hit it when it falls back out. 👿

Mastiles_fanylion

But there are plenty of reasons to be annoyed by me.

I am little though.

People who can’t be bothered to blow their noses. Sniff! Sniff! Sniff!

The person in front in the supermarket queue not putting the little “next customer” thingy behind their shopping…

AAAAAAAAARGH! KILL! MAIM! DESTROY!

The cheeky tilt-head to one side and sit there with your hands in your lap like a little old lady mannerisms of Bill Turnbull.

Whistling
Children
The parents of said children
People that suddenly stop or change direction in the street without checking to see who’s nearby
The inability of workmates to avoid pissing on the seat or smearing the toilet bowl with crap
Most TV adverts
Stansted Airport

People leaving cupboard doors, drawers and wardrobe doors open, grrr!

The person in front in the supermarket queue not putting the little “next customer” thingy behind their shopping.

You could always do it yourself..?

People who whisper.. I CANNOT STAND IT i tell you..

The person in front in the supermarket queue not putting the little “next customer” thingy behind their shopping…

AAAAAAAAARGH! KILL! MAIM! DESTROY!

haha

You’re a douchebag. I love folk that get annoyed about that and I intentionally wind them up. I can sense them getting all anxious behind me, despite there being a 6 foot gap behind my shopping that they could put their goods on.

Waking up and hearing Richard Madleys voice!!!!

You could always do it yourself..?

Who here makes very elaborate movements to say ‘Look, I am doing this for you, you lazy feckless idiot’ as they reach across said person to get the ‘next customer’ sign.

Not that I do, not ever.

Sometimes I just put my stuff down on the belt and watch a Mexican Standoff developing. They usually cave when they go into a blind panic that they may accidentally end up paying for my stuff.

despite there being a 6 foot gap behind my shopping what they could put their goods on

yes but the conveyor belt will stop at the next customer thing, thus ensuring that the checkout person doesn’t carry on beeping all the stuff through when they should have stopped.
That’s what they’re for.

Think about it.

Automatic doors that are really slow to open, so you have to stop and wait for them

Crumbs in the butter – use a butter knife.

When you finish your coffee, forget, then go for a swig, the disappointment is overwhelming.

I too hate sniffers.

yes but the conveyor belt will stop at the next customer thing, thus ensuring that the checkout person doesn’t carry on beeping all the stuff through when they should have stopped.
That’s what they’re for.

Think about it.

It’s even better when you pile your shopping on behind someone elses and they haven’t put the next customer thing down. I can feel the pulsing of the vein on their temple.

My perfect topic – here goes:

+1 Hoover hose
Litter
Picking something up for it to fall over again, then pick it up again and it falls again – at that point it normally gets booted across house.
Computers running slow
iphone auto text thingy
Our newborn baby screaming – i know it shouldn’t but it grinds on me
Work related – folk in change management jobs who dont understand anything technical relating to the change so you could tell them anything.
Rear mechs – the little L and H that you can hardly see
Bluetooth – everything to do with it
Printing from Computers and resizing images etc
Onion Skins/Garlic Clove Skin
Those Halifx isa isa baby adverts
The Lloyds TSB adverts – all of them with their shitty music
The Barclays bouncy castle adverts
Traffic lights that sit with all lights on red – or on green when there are no cars there.
Pot holes
My mother in law

Thats just a start!

EDIT:

Automatic doors that are really slow to open, so you have to stop and wait for them

Yep +1 for that too

Crumbs in the butter – use a butter knife.

Do you decant the butter using the butter knife then spread it with another one? 😕

When you finish your coffee, forget, then go for a swig, the disappointment is overwhelming.

Or when the last mouthful has gone cold because you left it a tiny bit too long.

Ahh – that explains a small corner of British Culture I had never understood. Some people put the supermarket thingie on the counter, some don’t – what is the proper form ?? One should do it, but of course one should never under any circumstances speak about it, if another person doesn’t, instead display lots of sniffy body language ?? Bit like waiting in line for the bus then.

It’s even better when you pile your shopping on behind someone elses and they haven’t put the next customer thing down. I can feel the pulsing of the vein on their temple

what will happen though is that the checkout person will make the mistake that I described earlier, then what will happen is that your items will need to be removed from the other person’s transaction before they can pay for it and you get your turn.
Which will just mean that you spend quite a lot longer at the checkout.

Wow you’re a genius.

Crap driving on the motorway that has no effect on me (eg. in the rearview mirror or in a completely different lane).

Waking up and hearing Richard Madleys voice!!!!

Have you and Richard spoken to Judy about this yet? she has the right to know. Do you spoon?

Jeremy Vine!!!

Sometimes I just put my stuff down on the belt and watch a Mexican Standoff developing. They usually cave when they go into a blind panic that they may accidentally end up paying for my stuff.

I play that little game EVERY time. Adds a little bit of sunshine to one of teh worst domestic chores of all time 🙂

Fred

Being Stuck behind a Doris on a Boris (bike), riding like she’s in a shampoo advert.

Ladies of the internet.
They offer so much but you can’t even touch them.