I am agreeing with tribal – again! Have we dated the same women! 😉

dunno woodsman, but it was worth it, nearly

i've skim-read the whole post and feel that i can help you…..

but, I NEED PICTURES FIRST.

then, and only then can i say whether or not it is worth continuing…..

IME that isn't "passionate" that's "nut job".

I agree with Epicyclo, next time she may cry rape.

Oh, and as for "It'll be ok after the divorce", no it won't. You will just lurch from one excuse to another "It's her period", "Her mother/sister/dog's ill", "She's had a bad day at work" and so on.

I said this above, but again, you need time to get your head together.

I said this above, but again, you need time to get your head together.

I know, but I can't walk away without knowing I tried it without the additional pressure of my divorce.
To paraphrase the great philosopher Biffy Clyro, I'll take a bruise, I know she's worth it…

Alpin, you don't need pictures. All you need to know is that she's a perfect 10 in my eyes. Mad as a box of frogs, but funny as hell and absolutely beautiful. Just hope we can get it back on track.

I would take a long good look at what type of person she is, she sounds a bit unhinged to me and potentially very dangerous! What happens when you really do something to enrage her? Do you know what her history of relationships are like? I think it wouldn't do you any harm to be single for while.

RUN AWAY !!

SO…in true STW style…you come on here with a problem, ask for advice…people spend 5 minutes of their lives thinking about your problem and adding a response, and then you ignore it.

Hey ho.

Dated a bird like this for 5 months before I met my wife, she told people we were getting married and used to scream at women (mutual friends / collegues) that I was talking to in the same bar. Total nutjob, insecure as hell. Decided that it wasn't my problem and binned her. Saw her a few months later with my now wife and she came over windmilling at us both screaming. Utter utter nutter.

Do you self a favour and get out now

SO…in true STW style…you come on here with a problem, ask for advice…people spend 5 minutes of their lives thinking about your problem and adding a response, and then you ignore it.

That's a little uncalled for, there are several pieces of conflicting advice – I can't take all of them! If you're offended that I've chosen advice from other people rather than you, perhaps you're a bit unhinged!
I've said several times that I'm grateful for people taking time to share their experiences, and I'm sure most of it is good advice in its own way. But it's very easy for a stranger to tell me to turn my back on the woman I love because she *may* accuse me of rape or boil my rabbit.
Muddyfox Courier's advice sounded like the most sensible to me – if she's worth it, work at it. Albeit with caution. At least that way I'll never look back and regret letting her go over one unfortunate incident.
Thanks again for sparing your time, all comments were useful.

I wasn't really referring to my advice…I really don't care what you do.

Loving the "unhinged" insult… 8)

I think people can be too quick to condemn this girl. You are probably giving off unintentional vibes to her that may be driving her nuts and making her insecure. This is easy to do without realising whats going on. I can see how the conversation would go with her family when you had to drag her out your house. It would be easy for that conversation to morph into "you roughing her up" without her really intending to say that to them.
If its that good when your together then I wouldnt walk away, but I do think you should get some counselling together as this will help to work through if there are any unresolved issues from your side of the fence. And anyway, a mate once said to me that women are all nuts, it just depends on whether you can cope with how nuts yours is! 😀

I think people can be too quick to condemn this girl

On the basis of what was written and personal experience (others seemingly having had similar), I'd certainly want nothing more to do with her.

I wasn't really referring to my advice…I really don't care what you do.

Perhaps it would have been better not to say anything then Angela. It came across as quite belittling.

I can see how the conversation would go with her family when you had to drag her out your house. It would be easy for that conversation to morph into "you roughing her up" without her really intending to say that to them.

That's kind of what she said to me earlier today. We spoke on the phone. I get the impression she painted herself into a corner when angry and can't find a way out. We've all done stuff like that, and I have to try and think what it must be like being 24 years old and being with someone who has had a life and marriage with someone else.

And you're right, they are all a bit nuts. Aren't they Angela? ;o)

get the impression she painted herself into a corner when angry and can't find a way out.

Sounds that way. Making strong allegations wouldn't be the normal way to get out of it though.

Anyway, each to their own…..

I wasn't really referring to my advice…I really don't care what you do.

Why bother posting and then going in the huff 🙂 ?

As you haven't said what caused the argument which set her off, I'm guessing something to do with the soon to be ex-wife as you constantly mention her and the divorce, then it is really difficult to say exactly how OTT her behaviour actually was. It doesn't really matter, as her actions and your reaction (she wasn't the only one shocked by it, think how you felt afterwards)to the situation have clearly left you in some distress. Do you really want to spend the next however many years pussyfooting around just in case you upset her?

You seem determined to give this every chance, which is admirable but remember your own words first sign of trouble again and I'll be out of there!"

Is it worth telling the cops your side of the story just in case they lie and press charges?!!

Protect yourselfand don't feel too guilty. Guilt can draw a man to support a dead relationship…

Ok she is insecure and needs reassurance but she also sounds like serious issues. If you can handle that and repairs to your flat…

I personally would get out unless the relationship was 100% brilliant.

Get divorced, see the lady if you must and sort things out.

Personally i think you could someone else no problemo that appreciates you and treats you equal and is not too much of a head shrink.

Give it time and see what happens with her.

Don't assume she will tell her family the truth or cops for that matter-cover yourself just in case.

I hope it goes well for you.

We need pictures!

'cos I am dying to know what a clothes maiden is…

or

lol @ Zaskar

Zaskar, she's made it abundently clear that she really regrets what happened and she knows that my actions don't warrant the bad rap I'm getting from her family. She wants to repair the damage, so I'm quite sure she's not going to go to the cops.
In terms of any future incidents, I'm quite sure that if there was an action replay, I'd finish things before they got that far.
Woody, the original argument centred around my friendship with another woman. She's been a close friend and colleague for many years, throughout my marriage, and she's just got engaged. I've tried to reassure S that this woman in not on my radar sexually, and that if she had been, I'd have done something about it long, long ago.
I guess that's probably an age thing – she can't understand how I can have a 100% platonic friendship with a woman, and she feels threatened.
I can empathise to a certain extent, and maybe I'll have to be a bit more careful about that sort of thing, but I've been having more dealings with this woman lately because she's hired me to do some work for the company she works for.

In my experience it is normally domestics that inlvole both parties but one more than the other. Normally its always (despite what the causes or triggers are)the bloke ends up banged up. There are women that 'enjoy' the attention that kicking off will produce( I personaly know of at least two who bait their husbands). There are controlling/violent (mentally and physically) men but also I have experienced a lot of violent/unstable women who are the cause of relationship problems.
What I am trying to say is, the relationship is not good, its happened once, it will happen again. A classic case of a relationship that is doomed to fail or worse still that will end up with traumatised kids being produced and the police being overly involved in your future life together.

I would like to say good luck. Sounds like you want to make sure you've done all you can to make it work. That way if you do have to walk away at least you can have a clear conscience that you tried your best and there isn't so much room for regret. Hope it goes well.

I guess that's probably an age thing – she can't understand how I can have a 100% platonic friendship with a woman, and she feels threatened.

that's not an age thing. and if it is, I would expect 24 to be 'old enough' to get the concept..

Thanks Kat. I'm sure she gets the concept, but I suspect most of us in our thirties were a lot less secure about that sort of thing when we were in our early/mid twenties.

This is horrible, it's like watching a car accident happen, and not being able to do anything about it

I see, so a clothes maiden is a clothes drier. I would be annoyed if someone knocked over my drying too, no going back from that kinda shit.

I guess that's probably an age thing – she can't understand how I can have a 100% platonic friendship with a woman, and she feels threatened.

If only it was as simple as that 😥 ………your girlfriend is concerned about the older/wiser/mature woman who, presumably, is nearer your own age. My ex is double your girlfriends age and guess what, she was worried about competition from a younger version. Insecurity can be there regardless of age and when combined with jealousy you have highly destructive bedfellows(no pun intended).

Looking back over the thread there may have been some overreactive comments but I think when you balance them out there is some very good advice and I don't think you are ander any illusion that whatever way you choose to go will be easy.

My advice would be to use your head rather than your heart (or any other part of your anatomy 😉 ). Hearts mend a lot quicker than f@cked up heads.

GET OUT. NOW.

The Crown Persecution Service appears to have a target to meet for prosecuting domestic violence cases, regardless of the situation.

The courts are full of posters about 'domestic violence': not one mentions violence perpetrated against a man in a heterosexual realtionship, and a call to a support line can elicit a response along the lines of 'you're a man, why are you calling?' Domestic violence against a man appears to be far more prevalent than is commonly realised.

Not going to go into specifics, but I have seen it get very messy when a woman calls 999 – the bloke doesn't get a fair shout. And the police have some very nasty tactics.

Thank God this wasn't me, but I did spend some time trying to help to pick up the pieces and in court as a shoulder to cry on. Happily, justice was served in the case I'm talking about.

DO NOT RISK GETTING YOURSELF INTO A SIMILAR SITUATION.

There is happiness out there with someone stable – as my mate would testify. We're going to his wedding soon.

Good luck and GET OUT!

Sorry – but it ain't worth it.

I thought that was called a clothes horse. You learn something new every day on here. I have a tumble dryer so it's a bit large to get knocked around but I expect if someone was really cross they could slam it's door and that would make me very upset as I do like a bit of peace and quiet. Its in the conservatory too and the dog sleeps out there so if they had a proper hissy fit I expect I'd have to clean everything again as it might get dog hair on it.

I expect I'd put up with it though especially if a nubile lady's underthings who was ten years my junior had her delicates in there. I might be a little blinded by that see. I'd just be thinking about getting conkers deep if you'll forgive the expression – My washing schedule would go right up the swanny. I expect it would piss the dog right off though, she was dreadful on bonfire night what with all the bangs.

I once got drawn into a rather racy game of email truth or dare with a little brunette that worked for a client of mine. After she'd emailed naked pics, and dared me to make a vibrating rubber cast of my Old Fellow for her, I dared her to tell me her ultimate fantasy. She told me it was to come round to my studio, enter without saying a word, perform what the papers might call a sex act, and then leave, without saying a word.

I was about to leave on an overseas business trip, but thinking about this helped fill a few private moments in my hotel room, especially a she kept texting me telling me she was going to act out her fantasy on my return. I joked that to make it perfect, she could flick the kettle on on her way out!

So, the following week, I'm relaxing in the loft apartment on the top floor of my offices, dozing and recovering from my jetlag, when I'm roused from my slumber by the unmistakable feeling of my button fly being unbuttoned.

True to her word, she performed said act – with considerable aplomb, I might add – and having succeeded (pardon the pun), she stood up, turned on her heals and left. I dressed and descended the stairs just in time to hear the sound of the kettle clicking off and found a cup with a teabag in it ready to be poured.
/
What a girl!

I just can't help wondering if this was while you were in another relationship. 😉

LOL @ Angela Poirot

Looking at the timings of the posts, you didn't by any chance leave that one on screen for your girlfriend to see did you 😯

Hmmm! Odd as 15 years ago he was in a relationship with his ex-wife and 15 years ago email was hardly a common thing.

Not to mention txting that's a very recent form of communication, some things amiss.

Looking at the timings of the posts, you didn't by any chance leave that one on screen for your girlfriend to see did you

My ex wife cancelled our wedding 6.5 years ago. We split up for around 6 months. I took full advantage of my single status and that liaison was during that time.

You don't own a "graphic design and print management company" by any chance do you? 8)

Are you some sort of stalker Angela?

Are you some sort of stalker Angela?

……………

…………………and a little brunette??????…………… 8)

It could have been much worse – imagine if she'd have knocked over your washing once it had been sorted into piles of silkens, man-made and cottons ready for ironing.

Oh man, I'm not even going to go into the laundry backet incident when she mixed up my darks, whites and brights!

Give it time and stay in contact. If it's meant to be you'll both make it work ..

Feel the love 🙂