Forum menu
I'm probably going to regret this... 🙄
Once a week in the morning I pass a lass going the same way as me to work on the cyclepath. She rides a nice MTB and looks great. This has been independently verified by a mate who rides past her in the opposite direction 😉
I'd like to say hello and get her number/email - how would you do it? Do I engineer a situation with said matey where we get her to stop (puncture, trouser malfunction..)? Or just the good old flash grenades/stun gun/rohipnol?
In all seriousness, I'm pretty shy around the lasses, so some manning up advice appreciated! Ta.
You could try doing a boom gnarly skid, but be careful not to get her pregnant.
'Hi I'm Kit, nice bike'
'Yeah my bf/husband built it for me'
*Akward Silence*
😛
pulls up leather armchair, dons smoking jacket, and awaits.........
Engineer a massive crash as she approaches you and as she tends you, tell her that you were lost in her beauty and utterly forgot to ride your bike.
Then pull a bunch of flowers from your bag and hand them to her, complete with a card containing your contact details...
Like that advert, write 'Hi' on the bottom a coffee mug and sit waiting for her. Drink it in perfect time for when she comes past.
Then knock her out with your wang.
1)Ride along behind her just keeping an appropriate distance.
2)Follow her wherever she's going.
3)Lurk around the Biffa bins allday whilst she's at work.
4)Follow her to wherever she goes in the evening.
5)Be there the next day when she leaves for work.
Repeat from step 1.
If it goes well you might even be able to steal some underwear from her washing line to add to all the headcam footage stills you adourn your bedroom walls with.
sobriety - Member
'Hi I'm Kit, nice bike''Yeah my bf/husband built it for me'
*Akward Silence*
Ditto
Or get ahead a bit, fake a puncture, stop her and ask if she has a pump 😯
Works for me
Scatter broken glass on her route, so that you can help her fix the inevitable puncture.
But never, ever mention that you've done this, even after you're married. She will never forgive you.
1)Ride along behind her just keeping an appropriate distance.
2)Follow her wherever she's going.
3)Lurk around the Biffa bins allday whilst she's at work.
4)Follow her to wherever she goes in the evening.
5)Be there the next day when she leaves for work.
Repeat from step 1.
Best thing Ive read on here all week.
get a mate to push her in the canal as she goes past so you can rescue her?
it does require fairly good timing and for your mate to understand *exactly* where he's supposed to be, though, or you just read about it in the local paper the followign day.
You ever seen the movie 50 first dates.
If not i suggest you watch it, he tries tonnes of ways to get her attention. SOOOOO funny
Try talking, it goes along way.
Start with the Contador style trigger salute as you blast past her. She'll like that 🙂
skills course required here i think.
this one is popular.
[url= http://blogs.laweekly.com/informer/crime/santa-monica-bike-groper/ ]Cyclists guide to Chatting up the Women[/url]
I mentally formed the sentence "Hi. I'm obviously only starting this conversation because you're exceedingly good-looking, but that is a very cool bike." yesterday morning while waiting for the lights to change at Aldwych.
But it didn't come out of my mouth. Which is probably a good thing. 🙂
Wheelies... chicks love wheelies.
I'm surprised your fame (notoriety?) and good looks haven't already overcome her 🙂
You ever seen the movie 50 first dates.
If not i suggest you watch it, he tries tonnes of ways to get her attention. SOOOOO funny
I probably wouldnt bother. The chances of it as being as good as the reply from TS Yeti are slim
Or get ahead a bit, fake a puncture, stop her and ask if she has a pump
Kit: Would you like a pump?
Hottie: Sorry?
Kit: Er I mean, do you have a pump?
Is it a white diamond back? IF so I probably know her, seriously!
this her?
[img] 
[/img]
Her cup-holder contains a cup of piss, with a straw. Avoid. 😯
"Hey, that's a really nice, uh, saddle you've got there"
Her cup-holder contains a cup of piss, with a straw. Avoid
Or not....it might be the thing that drew Kit's attention to her.
Oh and [url= http://www.singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/anyone-in-the-surrey-hills-area-recognise-this-chap ]geetee1972[/url] to the thread please.
trouser malfunction
Kit. How were you thinking this would work? Just out of interest? 😀
this her?
Not far off, actually! I'm taking notes gents, cheers 🙂
Kit. How were you thinking this would work? Just out of interest?
I am assuming it will involve some of those tear off stripper trousers.
Kit
Have you seen
[url= http://www.singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/weirdo-on-my-commute-keeps-leering-at-me-should-i-get-the-bus ]this thread[/url]
😆
"Morning. You know that thing in the free papers where they have "I saw you on the tube and you were cute, call me"? It's kinda a shame they don't have one for cyclists, although I'm not really sure those things really work anyway. Anyhoo. The point I'm making is, if there was a section in Cycling Weekly like that, I'd probably be putting an entry in there to try and get your attention. But since there isn't I've engineered this trouser malfunction so that we could have this conversation and so that I could give you this card, which has my telephone number, my email address and my facebook and twitter accounts on it and I wonder perhaps if you'd like to maybe hang out sometime. Yes. Anyway. Think about it. "
Why not just take mental pictures for later use like the rest of us?
....or an actual picture. Just make sure the flash is turned off.
Well if you don't want to start with stalking her (I always call my [s]vicitms[/s] girlfriends Penelope BTW) then I have a Plan B for you.. it goes like this...
Pull a wheelie as you pass her, give her a massive obvious sideways glance, if you can take a hand off the bars to wave all the better, finish the wheelie still looking at her by crashing into a bus stop...
...if she keeps on riding go back to my plan A.
start by making eye contact and smiling.
if she smiles back, repeat once (but no more) then:
have a flower to give her as you pass? (no idea why, but flowers have ALWAYS been well recieved ime)
leave a note tied to the flower?
warning, i have no idea about women, but that's what i'd do under the circumstances...
Start with the Contador style trigger salute as you blast past her
great idea, important that you don't get it mixed up with the Cavendish 'archer' salute though...
Do not, I repeat, do not wear lycra!
[img] 
[/img]
Do you have to stop at any point during you journey together? (engineer it so you stop together)
Obviously easier to talk to some-one when you both stopped, then make a comment about the bike/riding/how goddam fit she is..
Last day of my commute (changed job) I had a nice young lady start talking to me @ the traffic lights, about how [cycle] fit I was, to blast past her everyday (it was a very short commute for me).
Compliments work well.. hope she didn't think she scared me off the commute as I disappeared after that, though she was probably just making conversation...
i cant believe you pass her...if it were me i'd just stay right on that back wheel, rohipnol blow dart primed and ready... 😈
Next week is also my last week at work, so unless I'm up early on my holidays I'm unlikely to catch her. And when I say 'catch' I don't mean with like a bear trap or something. Maybe a net though...
so you've not told us where you commute from and too and at what time....
I'm sick to death of Hora's rohypnol blow darts. Its not that I mind so much what he does to me to while I'm out cold. Its the bruises and scars I've got from constantly falling off my bike as i pass out.
Its worth remembering that.
Why no bear trap? She'll be much easier to keep if she can't run.
I'm a leg and bum man, myself, so I'd hate to ruin her.
Damn... I have a foot fetish...
I thought 'ruining her' was the ultimate goal?
Lets see how long Hora takes to chip in with reference to flash grenades etc. I'm surprised he's not already