How much allowance for a teenager ??

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How much allowance for a teenager ??

77 posts & 54 voices | Started 1 year ago by DrJ | Latest reply from user-removed

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yesiamtom - Member

I only left college a year and a half ago but i got £30 a week. My parents reasoning was this is what i would get on EMA if my parents didnt earn what they did. I wouldnt say they are rich but are well off financially. Being 60 with no mortage is obviously quite nice!

Regardless though of how much they make I have friends whos parents dont relaly pay for anything for them. My girlfriends parents said she had to pay her own way through uni whilst they waste moeny on new tvs every year or so and always buying new or near new cars. It sickens me when someone treats younger people/their children in a certain wya just because they were treated like that. Grow the **** up frankly.

That said I think molgrips is pretty on the mark with the having a review. I'm not saying spoil here because all us 'kids' need to be loaded but making kids work when they should be learning is not a good idea.

Posted 1 year ago #
khani - Member

Dunno about an allowance, we were poor and I had to get a job when I left school
But on the tantrums, when the wifes 18yr old son started having 'i want' tantrums I recorded one on my phones video, and later when he had calmed down i played it back to him, I think the sight of himself acting like Kevin the teenager shocked him out of it, they don't realise how they are acting most of the time I think,
I also said that I'd put it on YouTube if he kept it up, which went down well

Posted 1 year ago #
b r - Member

Only you can know what is both reasonable and that you can afford.

For reference I give my eldest two (15 and 16) an allowance of £100 pcm(plus their mobiles go through my company), and their mum (my ex) tops up as and when. Out of this they pay for most things.

My youngest gets £50, and usually spends it in lump sums every other month or so.

I'm not one for kids working (I didn't, so don't see why they should), I'd rather they enjoyed their life. The eldest two are very active sportsmen, playing in local cricket and football teams.

And they've all got bikes too.

Kids are expensive, fact - but I'm glad I've got them.

Posted 1 year ago #
bravohotel9er - Member

I think I got £50 per month whilst I was at sixth form college (Sept 1996 - June 1998) which seemed reasonable.

My parents paid for the bus to and from college too and I had a job at a pub some evenings and the local garden centre every weekend which brought in several hundred per month too.

It used to do me fine between school holidays when I'd work all the hours I could manage at Argos. It kept me in skateboard decks, Etnies, snakebite and black and mailorder punk albums anyway.

I feel sorry for kids now, those sort of casual jobs a re a lot harder to come by.

Posted 1 year ago #
MrsTricky - Member

When my 15 year old wanted some extra cash over the summer holidays, I did a list of all the jobs around the house that I didn't want to do, and offered her £5 an hour to do them. This didn't include the general tidying etc that I'd normally expect her to do, but did include shredding, filing (I work from home), typing up stories that my grandad wrote etc. She had to keep a proper record of the time she spent, and I paid her accordingly. Worked really well.

Posted 1 year ago #
Woody - Member

Difficult one re money as she is 'getting on' a bit now but she if she can't get some extra cash from a part-time job then she obviously needs something from you. I wouldn't be tolerating tantrums at that age, they should have been over and done with years ago, she's an adult and should behave like one if she wants to be treated like one.

Does she help around the house to earn her keep, if not that is one way of justifying her allowance.

I can't really preach though, mine is 22 and although she had a paper round at 14 and a few jobs at uni, it certainly wasn't enough to pay for anything other than nights out, which is obviously much more important than food, clothing or rent.

She is presently in Rio before heading for Bolivia and then Chile. Trust me, anything you 'pay' her now will pale into insignificance a couple of years down the line

Posted 1 year ago #
DaRC_L - Member

Khani - that's a great tip I shall use that one.

Surfer - I have the same problem with my 12 year old "all my mates play on Modern Warfare...".

Other than that it's +1 for wot molgrips sed...

Posted 1 year ago #
toys19 - Member

Molgrips makes sense. Work sucks and life is short, why spoil it for them just because your parents made it harder for you?

I don't think kids are so linear in their thinking that working for it makes them value money. I know two kids who's parents are insanely rich (think multiple millions pound houses on different continents) and they have lots of stuff. I have never once seen or heard them asking for anything.

Conversely I had numerous jobs throughout my teenager years as I only got 3 quid a week, and I am still a frivolous, money wasting, demanding and spoiled little shit.

My kids are only little 3 1/2 and 9 months, i am looking forward to sending them to private school, buying them stupidly expensive trainers and watching them live their lives of luxury, because that is what I hope will happen, call it a vicarious pleasure on my part but I really and honestly hope my kids have the life of Reilly.

Posted 1 year ago #
Tiger6791 - Member

I stopped getting pocket money when I was 13 and allowed to get a paper round.

When I was 17 I received no pocket money at all! I had a milk round before school and valeted cars at the weekend. I also laboured all of my summer holidays. As soon as I was 18 I worked in a bar. I had 3 jobs and school.

I was working so hard I failed all of my 'A' levels. (my university place was revoked.)

In a strange way I'm glad I missed uni and the debt (not the experience though) I now think I know the value of money better than most though.

Daughters are different though, wouldn't make mine work like I did, how's £100 a month sound?

Posted 1 year ago #
cranberry - Member

DrJ - there are plenty of expat brats at the BSN in The Hague. Now I'm not a parent, but if I was I would be moving heaven and earth to make sure that my daughter didn't become one of them.

Whichever school she is in she will be learning enough Dutch to get a waitressing job, and working alongside the dutch will help her with the language more than getting lessons would.

So my prescription - tell her to go and earn whatever she wants to spend.

Posted 1 year ago #
toys19 - Member

My mate on the desk opposite me is a farmers son, he knows the value of money and he is the tightest most miserable bastard I know, do we wish to turn our kids into people like that?

Posted 1 year ago #
khani - Member

He certainly thinks more about his approach to his requests now, which was 99% of the problem tbh,

Posted 1 year ago #
Cletus - Member

I think working does make kids appreciate the value of money. The language issue just seems a convenient excuse.

You need to make sure that work does not negatively impact on study but not too difficult imo.

Having a job teaches kids a sense of responsibility as well - maybe she would not be throwing tantrums at 18 if she had been doing a paper round from the age of 13?

Posted 1 year ago #
toys19 - Member

Having a job teaches kids a sense of responsibility as well - maybe she would not be throwing tantrums at 18 if she had been doing a paper round from the age of 13?

Come on do you really think this statement is valid or makes any sense?

No one really knows how to bring up kids, they respond in the strangest ways to your inputs, and watching 999Nanny or whatever its called is not a way to learn how they will react either.

Posted 1 year ago #
molgrips - Member

I did a paper round as a kid, and worked in the supermarket. I hated ever second of it and I grew up to be a debt-ridden spendthrift.

Kids are people, and are therefore a sh*tload more complicated than that. As a kid, if I had it I spent it, if I didn't I didn't. I bought some sensible stuff, some not. It didn't really matter where it came from.

Posted 1 year ago #
toys19 - Member

Kids are people, and are therefore a sh*tload more complicated than that. As a kid, if I had it I spent it, if I didn't I didn't. I bought some sensible stuff, some not. It didn't really matter where it came from.

This is about as real and accurate as it gets..

Posted 1 year ago #
miketually - Member

Wow, some people on here are giving their kids shit loads of cash. This might explain why all my students can afford better phones than me.

Posted 1 year ago #
Travis - Member

I got a job when I was 12 to pay for my own things.

One thing I wish my parents had taught me though, was the value of money.

I'd say +1 for Molgrips, but also, she needs to understand why you can/can't give her x money.

If she works for it, she might value it, as long as you don't give it away willy nilly

Posted 1 year ago #
Tiger6791 - Member

Why not try a social experiment and give her all of your money and she has to pay the bills, shopping etc dish it out fairly.

What's the worst that could happen?

Posted 1 year ago #
molgrips - Member

but also, she needs to understand why you can/can't give her x money.

Yeah. I think it'd be good to be involved in the household management as a youngster - I had to find out a lot of stuff for myself later in life.

Posted 1 year ago #
Filthy - Member

Pocket money stops at 18 in our house, 13 year old currently gets £10 a week plus £15 monthly mobile top up for her free texts.

Told her if she goes to Uni, she can have a room to come back to in the holidays, if not she can pack her bags and make her way in the world. Sorry but your an adult when you reach 18, time to cut the apron strings and let them go. Harsh but they have to learn sometime, don't get me wrong I'm not a **** and wouldn't see any of them on the streets but I think they need to make thier own path in life and it's the only way to learn.

Posted 1 year ago #
Cletus - Member

Having a job teaches kids a sense of responsibility as well - maybe she would not be throwing tantrums at 18 if she had been doing a paper round from the age of 13?

Come on do you really think this statement is valid or makes any sense?

No one really knows how to bring up kids, they respond in the strangest ways to your inputs, and watching 999Nanny or whatever its called is not a way to learn how they will react either.

I do think it is valid. Having an 18 year old screaming for free money when she is perfectly capable of earning herself is pretty sad. The sooner kids learn lessons about the value of money and the dignity of working rather than sponging the better.

From some of the responses so far we could probably have a STW special edition of Young, Dumb and Living Off Mum.

Posted 1 year ago #
miketually - Member

13 year old currently gets £10 a week plus £15 monthly mobile top up for her free texts

£55 a month at 13? Blimey.

What do they buy out of that? Do they pay for their own lunches at school and their own clothes too?

Posted 1 year ago #
gravitysucks - Member

Molgrips is spot on that they kids are people and will all react differently.

We were skint growing up, I started working at 12 and have never been out of work since other than a two week period.
It hasn't taught me to be good with money in the slightest. If I want something I get it. simples.
Fair enough I work hard for it but I'm a spolit git, albeit a hard working one

Posted 1 year ago #
Elfinsafety - Member

**** me, when I was 17 I was serving in Bosnia.

That's something for her to consider. That elsewhere in the World, people her own age and younger are involved in wars. While she frets about the latest George Michael single (or whatever it is teenage girls fret over these days I don't know).

Posted 1 year ago #
thisisnotaspoon - Member

I had about £5 a week from 15-18, saturday job got me another £20 or so per week.

In high school there was a free bus

In 6th form my parents bought me a cheep 50cc 2 stroke scooter in the first year (~£600) and paid my 125cc honda's insuance (sold the 50cc for £500 and bought the honda for £1100 toped up with my own money) in the 2nd year (~£350) and a tank of petrol once a week (£10).

Basicly, whatever I've paid for through saving up for something, they've usualy matched (inlcuding buying my first car at 23!).

It's all well and good saying 'get a saturday job', but at 16/17 you're earnings are limited to about £25 a day as min wage doesn't apply. That buys what? A t-shirt from primark, a pint in the pub and a cinema ticket, hardly the life of Riley!

Posted 1 year ago #
BigJohn - Member

There's a very good article in today's Independent about this very subject.

Here it is

Posted 1 year ago #
miketually - Member

It's all well and good saying 'get a saturday job', but at 16/17 you're earnings are limited to about £25 a day as min wage doesn't apply. That buys what? A t-shirt from primark, a pint in the pub and a cinema ticket, hardly the life of Riley!

They shouldn't have time for the cinema and pub.

At 17, while at 6th form, I worked Monday and Tuesday evenings (5-9 each), saw the girlfriend on a Wednesday evening, went to ventures on a Thursday evening and worked on a Friday night evening (6-10).

I started on £1.95 an hour in Morrisons at 16 in 1993, so my ten hour week got me just over £80 a month.

Posted 1 year ago #
b r - Member

Told her if she goes to Uni, she can have a room to come back to in the holidays, if not she can pack her bags and make her way in the world. Sorry but your an adult when you reach 18, time to cut the apron strings and let them go. Harsh but they have to learn sometime, don't get me wrong I'm not a **** and wouldn't see any of them on the streets but I think they need to make thier own path in life and it's the only way to learn.

Hmm, we haven't got you wrong - you are a ****

Kids need parents, even as adults; and parents will need their kids, at some point...

Posted 1 year ago #
Filthy - Member

Do they pay for their own lunches at school and their own clothes too?

Own clothes yes unless it's uniform or essentials and if she wants takeaway she pays for that too.

Posted 1 year ago #
TheLittlestHobo - Member

Pah, all these hard luck stories are pathetic compared to mine.

Aged 13 to 15 i worked a milk round on £20per week and managed to save up £1500 in my savings acount.

Aged 15.5 my parents moved to the other end of the country and agreed to leave me behind (I didnt want to go). They agreed to let me stay behind in the house they were struggling to sell (Cos they wanted too much for it)

I was working a saturday job for £25 per week and doing my gcse's then alevels.

I had to pay the council taxt out of my £25 per week as my contribution towards 'board' which funnily enough maounted to my £25 per week. I then had to 'find' some money to pay for my food. Funnily enough when the £1000 savings i had ran out i ended up running up enough council tax debts to land my dad a CCJ (I kept it quiet). He paid it and then frog marched me to the bank at 17/18 to get a £1000 loan out to pay him back. It took me 2 years to pay off that loan. The next day i called my mam & dad to tell them i had moved out and enjoy their money.

I wont even discuss money with my parents these days.

A child needs to respect and understand money but they also shouldnt be slaves to earning it either. At nearly 18 your daughter shouldnt be so relient on daddy imo

Posted 1 year ago #
djglover - Member

I started on £1.95 an hour in Morrisons at 16 in 1993

I may well have worked with you! I must have started a little earlier as I remember it being £1.87.

I also worked in Perrys glass collecting

Posted 1 year ago #
Shorty121 - Member

Being 16 in sixth form earn £50 quid in the weekends then my allowance is £150 a month but because we live in a village

£74 a month goes on travel
£76 goes on food

then I have to buy my own clothes

Posted 1 year ago #
miketually - Member

I may well have worked with you! I must have started a little earlier as I remember it being £1.87.

Could have done

North Road Morrisons, from October '93 to when I left for uni in '96. Essentially, I faced up non-foods for 12 hours a bloody week, for Adrian.

Posted 1 year ago #
oxnop - Member

When I was 18 and in the sixth form (7yrs ago) I didn't get an allowance. Sure my parents would help me out but TBH I rarely needed help. I worked in retail 1 night a week and Saturday/Sunday. I was able to go out twice a week and run a car (didn't need to pay board)

I was taught from a young age the meaning of money and my first proper MTB was when I was 15 and saved up money from my 3 paper rounds (including Xmas tips) to buy a Sunn xircuit which I had built with full XTR. My parents couldn't believe that I could save up that kind of money so paid half towards it as they didnt want me spending all the money I saved.

I was never spoilt as a child £30 max for birthdays and £100max for Xmas. I had mates who would get over £1k spent on them at Xmas whilst their parents struggled to pay the bills. I had my own house, 2 nice cars, 2 nice motorbikes & 2 nice mountain bikes by the time I was 22 (all the important things ). I put it down to being taught that you don't get what you don't work for from a young age.

Posted 1 year ago #