Questions about chainsaws I mean…

Why should you wear the proper gear?

Should you pick it up by the blunt or pointy end ?

Why should you wear the proper gear?

Personal Protection Equipment must be worn to protect the user from….dangerous stuff.

Ear protection, chainsaw trousers, head protection, eye protection, chainsaw boots, gloves..

Is it possible to fit a chainsaw to the stump where your hand should be, like this guy?

Should you pick it up by the blunt or pointy end ?

If the blade is blunt enough to pick it up by, it needs sharpening.
This will make the cut more efficient, reduce vibration, increase accuracy and increase safety in use..

Is it possible to fit a chainsaw to the stump where your hand should be, like this guy?

Yes….yes it is.

Though I cannot see a chainbrake fitted to that machine so personally I would have a more modern version fitted with the required safety features.

Why should both feet be firmly on the ground when using the chainsaw?

What danger does chain shrapnel pose?

Complete the following sentence:

I cut down trees, I wear high heels Suspenders and a bra……

when severing heads in a shopping mall, which 3 safety points must particularly be borne in mind ?

What length bar for zombies?

when severing heads in a shopping mall, which 3 safety points must particularly be borne in mind ?

As a follow on question, should you kneel or stand when decapitating small children?

What tyre’s do I need for chopping logs?

As a follow on question, should you kneel or stand when decapitating small children?

Small children should be dealt with by an angled cut from a standing position. If you kneel down you are leaving yourself vulnerable to attack as you need to stand before running..

How many working petrol chainsaws can you juggle with?

If you pull round the chain by hand, can you kickstart the engine?

Why should you check the height of the depth gauge on each tooth of the chain?

What kind of chain lubricating oil should you use near watercourses?

10 safety features on the saw?
Spark plug has black deposits on it. Good/bad?
Name two different sprocket types?
When would a semi chisel chain be better than full chisel?

What is the optimum chain tooth angle for dismembering dead prostitutes bodies, and which type of saw horse is best utilised to properly and fully secure their limbs during this operation (2 points)?

What is the air speed velocity of an unladened swallow?

I thought the CS30,31,32 etc assessments no longer existed as of the end of last year? Are you sure of the qualification you’re getting?

a chainsaw on a conveyor belt chops down a tree in a forest, no-one is around, does it make a sound?

You’re half way through decapitating a small child when the chain jams on their orthodontic brace. What is the recommended technique to free the chain?

There’s an aeroplane on a conveyorbelt. Will chasing it with a chainsaw make it take off faster?

What is the air speed velocity of an unladened swallow?

African or European?

I thought the CS30,31,32 etc assessments no longer existed as of the end of last year?

True, they are now ‘officially’ NPTC units 201, 202 for maintenance and cross cutting. 203 for small fell etcetc but mostly they still get referred to by the old ‘CS’ names as everything is the same except the numbers on your city and guilds card/cert.

on my saw, my new chain (which is correctly adjusted before running) appears a bit too slack on the lower side after I have run it…what do I need to check? could my bar be slipping?

on my saw, my new chain (which is correctly adjusted before running) appears a bit too slack on the lower side after I have run it…what do I need to check? could my bar be slipping?

New chains tend to stretch, just re adjust the tension (whilst holding up the nose of the bar) and all should be good.

I think teddy was testing kayak, mechmonkey, not a pro like you 🙂

anyway, if my chain kept slackening after running briefly Id be also checking that my sprocket didnt have a worn channel in it too …

In the event of losing a leg or arm (careless I know), tourniquet or not?

Is there anything wrong in this picture?

I PASSED!!!!!!! 8)

Why should both feet be firmly on the ground when using the chainsaw?

Because the Flamingo look is soooo last season?

What danger does chain shrapnel pose?

It induces periodic wingeing in old war veterans.

Complete the following sentence:

I cut down trees, I wear high heels Suspenders and a bra……

I put on Womens clothing, and hang around in bars?

when severing heads in a shopping mall, which 3 safety points must particularly be borne in mind ?

Fire exits should be noted, signage must be erected to warn of slippage danger due to the spilt blood, Muzak played over the tannoy must be in stark contrast to the horrific bloodbath ensuing on the ground to aid relaxation.

What length bar for zombies?

You want a mid-range bar to maximise reach without compromising manoeverability.

As a follow on question, should you kneel or stand when decapitating small children?

You need kneel only if the child is royalty. All others can be bought down in a relaxed but respectful stance.

What tyre’s do I need for chopping logs?

Minion dual ply front, High Roller rear,

How many working petrol chainsaws can you juggle with?

5 of the garden/diy variety, 3 professional larger models.

If you pull round the chain by hand, can you kickstart the engine?

So long as you have it parked on a hill.

Why should you check the height of the depth gauge on each tooth of the chain?

What kind of chain lubricating oil should you use near watercourses?

Depth gauge should be checked as there is an increased risk of kickback with incorrect depth and also vibration can increase.

A biodegradeable oil should be used. Various brands are available based on ingredients such as rapeseed oil.

10 safety features on the saw?

Blade cover, exhaust, chainbrake, cut out switch, H&S sticker, hand guard, on/off switch, chain catcher, spring-mount, front teeth.

Spark plug has black deposits on it. Good/bad?

Bad. Mixture too rich

Name two different sprocket types?

Rim and spur

When would a semi chisel chain be better than full chisel?

When cutting hardwoods, ‘dirty timber’, stump work.

What is the optimum chain tooth angle for dismembering dead prostitutes bodies, and which type of saw horse is best utilised to properly and fully secure their limbs during this operation (2 points)?

31.5 degrees, and a Y-shaped saw horse for prostitutes limbs.

What is the air speed velocity of an unladened swallow?

Unladened, but is it atop a conveyor belt? This greatly affects the outcome.

thought the CS30,31,32 etc assessments no longer existed as of the end of last year? Are you sure of the qualification you’re getting?

That’s right. The course was billed as CS30/31 or whatever but when he came to pass us, he explained the new qual-code. (201 – 203 or something)

a chainsaw on a conveyor belt chops down a tree in a forest, no-one is around, does it make a sound?

The conveyor belt and the chainsaw make a sound, the tree does not.

You’re half way through decapitating a small child when the chain jams on their orthodontic brace. What is the recommended technique to free the chain?

Sweets?

There’s an aeroplane on a conveyorbelt. Will chasing it with a chainsaw make it take off faster?

No. Aeroplanes are inanimate. Unless the pilot sees you, there will be little or no change.

African or European?

Prefer not to say.

In the event of losing a leg or arm (careless I know), tourniquet or not?

Yes, although you may require some help with the arm one…

Is there anything wrong in this picture?

Yes, skinwall tyre on the rear, black sidewall on the front.

Thanks for the questions folks. Strangely I wasn’t asked many of the above ones but thankfully I passed anyway… 😀

Congrats! 😀

Well done! 😀

Bloody brilliant, both passing and answering the questions 😆

favourited for if and when I go for mine. Lett’s revision guide to chainsawing exams.

And well done!