Viewing 24 posts - 1 through 24 (of 24 total)
  • Give me an excuse to get out of playing Wendyball!
  • tacopowell
    Free Member

    I was always that kid that got picked last in PE,
    I’ve been informed this particular group of 5 a side are of similar playing ability.
    My biggest problem is I’ve previously shown interest in playing but in truth I have no desire to play!

    Do I tell my true feelings? or do I use a STW supplied excuse?

    Let rip!

    stumpy01
    Full Member

    Dodgy knees, from previous football injury. Mention ligaments, particularly anterior cruciate ligament and people generally reply with something along the lines of ‘oooooh, nasty’.

    I’ve no idea what an anterior cruciate ligament is, or where it goes but I’ve heard it mentioned on match of the day.

    lunge
    Full Member

    Turn up once, be crap, never go again. You will have to put up with an hour of unpleasantness but they can never then say you didn’t turn up.

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    tiggs121
    Free Member

    “My club doesn’t allow me to play social matches.”

    bruneep
    Full Member

    njee20
    Free Member

    “Sorry guys, actually, I don’t want to play”. Insert self deprecating joke if you want.

    Some people shouldn’t be allowed outside unaccompanied!

    Jamie
    Free Member

    Just play the bloody game yer wet lettuce.

    …or get a responsible adult, not yourself obviously, to write a note to give to the teacher.

    nbt
    Full Member

    I don’t actually like football. I don’t really want to play. If you need me to make up the numbers I’ll play but only if you all agree to come out on a bike ride first

    Tom83
    Full Member

    Call it wendyball in front of the people who asked you to play. They’ll probably retract the invitation…

    Jamie
    Free Member

    If you need me to make up the numbers I’ll play but only if you all agree to come out on a bike ride first

    …..and of course I will provide the bike and helmet.

    seosamh77
    Free Member

    Mtfu applies to fitba as well.

    sandwicheater
    Full Member

    Turn up once, be crap, never go again

    This is my preferred technique. I also prefer to break myself the one and only time I turn up. Be it warming up, watching or playing, I will snap something, FACT!

    john_drummer
    Free Member

    How about saying “nah, don’t like football”. Perhaps then someone who does like it will get a game instead.

    crankboy
    Free Member

    Why show an interest in playing if you have no desire to play?

    your friends:” we play 5 a side football do you fancy a game some time?”

    you: “yeh cool that sounds good let me know when you need a player”

    You :thinks(they’ll never take me up on that )

    or
    MY friends :” we play 5 a side football do you fancy a game some time?”

    me :”don’t be retards you know I hate team sports if I want a homoerotic experience I’ll go to a gay bar”

    me :thinks ( cool I’ve got 4 friends !)

    flatfish
    Free Member

    If you call it wendyball you will undoubtedly have no coordination in either foot, so it begs to ask the question?
    Why ask a muppet to play football with them. 🙄

    badnewz
    Free Member

    Starting to play football again after a long break is pretty much knee-suicide. If you do have to play just say you play goalie and hope your team aren’t crap.

    atlaz
    Free Member

    Just tell them you don’t want to. I got roped into a game a few years ago. I enjoyed it once I got started but I wouldn’t do it again

    binners
    Full Member

    My preferred option was to turn up, then adopt the same attitude as a player who belongs in a 1970’s Leeds team.

    You don’t get asked back. 😀

    scaredypants
    Full Member

    tell them you’re an uncoordinated pansy with a fear of physical contact and self-confidence issues that mean you didn’t tell them this initially

    that’ll fool them

    DezB
    Free Member

    Say “yes” then don’t turn up. That way they’ll KNOW you’re a c…..

    AndyPaice
    Free Member

    when playing 5 a side for the first time on astroturf with new work people, I ‘tackled’ my line manager resulting in him skinning both knees and elbows badly enough that he struggled to walk the next day. They were quite happy when I declined to play again.

    cheekyboy
    Free Member

    Tell them you are crap at spitting, scowling and generally being a twit 😉

    wanmankylung
    Free Member

    Tell them you’re on a promise.

    CountZero
    Full Member

    Who the **** needs a chuffing excuse? Grow a pair and say straight out you have no interest and you’re not playing. End of.

Viewing 24 posts - 1 through 24 (of 24 total)

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