Has anyone had any freak accidents that they just didn’t see coming?

I scared the ***** out of myself last night and need some other stories of stupidity or random to clear my head!

As I was leaving the house a pan that was drying on the the kitchen side / hob must have been knocked by me opening the door… on return the hob was on full heat and had been for 2 hours and said pan was burning a hole into the worktop… luckily I came back when I did but still with the windows open for 20 hours the flat stinks 🙁

There is no such thing as accident; it is fate misnamed

yep, that was the universe trying to kill you, its only a matter of time now.

I might watch Final Destination tonight to see the other possible ways I can fail

[video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=rxYVT3x6_hM[/video]

My mum threw a fag butt into the garden when she was babysitting for us. When me and Mrs Daz arrived back from the pub we discovered a smouldering burnt out front garden. Turns out the dead leaves and sticks caught fire and the neighbours had to put it out as flames were going about 4ft up the outside wall just next to the wooden windows and front door.

I woke up in hospital a few weeks back to see a doctor stitching my top lip and chin back together. I haven’t got a clue about how it happened. I fell off my bike somehow on a flat dirt path. I remember nothing of the 2 days before it happened either.
I can only put that down to a freak accident
Andy

Merak, that clip is comedy gold for the sheer absurdity of that scenario!

A client (and a very well-respected doctor) recently broke his neck jumping over a low wall and somehow tripping over his own flip flops.

Fortunately (and very co-incidentally) he had bumped into another surgeon from his hospital whilst in the airport on his way to the holiday and found he was actually staying in the same hotel. And that doctor’s specialism? Yep – back injuries.

At least that meant he got *very* good care. And made a full recovery.

I came home last night also to find the hob on 😯

Mrs Dancake got a severe ticking off. “Always turn the power off at the wall when you have finished using it etc etc etc “

I think the cat used the nob to get some purchase when jumping up onto the cupboard and turned it on…

edit. Not really an accident but called the fire brigade out once as smoke seemed to be coming from my extension roof. Thermal imaging camera found the dry pete in the window box smouldering – at it’s centre was a fag butt…(fireman put it out with MY HOSE PIPE)

2 fire engines ticking over at midnight outside your house gets the neighbours talking, i can tell you

A former colleague of mine ended up with a broken nose & fractured skull whilst cleaning his teeth one morning.

my wife’s boss was killed when a piece of metal was flicked up from the road by the van in front and came through the windscreen into his head.

Desperately sad. Spent many years working and driving in some sketchy parts of the world. His young family were in the car with him (he got the car safely to the hard shoulder before losing consciousness). Sorely missed.

One of those that reminds you to live life to the full, because you really do never know…

wife’s friends husband was decapitated by a steel beam coming through the back of his cab when he hit someone who pulled out on him.

A client (and a very well-respected doctor) recently broke his neck jumping over a low wall and somehow tripping over his own flip flops.

A friend of mine was killed by a head injury when he tripped while walking downstairs wearing flip flops. Dangerous things.

Be careful of the dishwasher. It’s not unheard of, unless you have a Miele.

double post

I’ve had some corkers..

Broke my nose being sick in teenage drinking years with a toilet seat, threw toilet seat up, bent down to vomit, toilet seat hit cistern and came down on my nose.

Burnt left hand badly walking past an iron and trippling on the flex.

Currently have right hand in a splint where EPL tendon in right thumb snapped operating a remote control to turn on Cbeebies (had tendonitis in wrist for some time before)

And my personal favourite, got frostbite working in a chicken/ turkey slaughterhouse as a student in my groin!

There is a good case for me being wrapped up in cotton wool and never being allowed to leave the house.

I’m feeling much better as a human now thanks guys – any tips on removing said plasticy burn smell from my house would be greatly appreciated also

This thread is useless without WCA!

Scud

And my personal favourite, got frostbite working in a chicken/ turkey slaughterhouse as a student in my groin!

WTF were you doing to the chickens!

Long story (and not what your sleezy mind is probably thinking!), me and a mate got sent there as a temp agency job whilst students up in York. It was January and we worked in a section where it was 5 degrees taking the chickens which were already portioned up, into the “blast room” where it was about – 15 degrees.

When i got in the taxi home, it felt like i had the worst pins and needles in my legs, went to York Hospital and they said that where i had come from -15, going to +5 probably felt tropical, coupled with the heavy lifting, they thought that the groin sweats the most and the sweat had been freezing on my leg.

Ended up with 3 large area black areas of flesh in my leg which over time lifted out and they stitched the skin back over.

Worst part was that they hadn’t seen frostbite there before, so i had a line of doctors and students come to take a look at York Hospital, then they decided i needed treatment at the specialist burns unit in Leeds, which also seemed to entail a line of students looking at my groin whilst i had my trolleys round my ankles…

Someone I worked with tore a ligament opening a jar of pickle. (He was making lunch for the patients so it was an injury in the line of duty so to speak: sickness is recorded differently and your sick pay is different if you are off for ages. For this reason he had to write the accident report in his uninijured left hand. 😆 )

Very nearly took both my eyes out in one go, with a set of needle-nosed pliers.
Can’t remember the exact scenario, but I had something in the vice with a pin or screw stuck in it (I think it might have been an old hope caliper.) Anyway, gripping the pin with these pliers, with both hands, and pulling full force, the damn things slipped. Because it was straight in front of me, they flew back and up and the pliers hit me square between the eyes; leaving cuts on both sides of the bridge of my nose.

I had to sit down and have a quiet word with myself…

Merak, that clip is comedy gold for the sheer absurdity of that scenario!

Not least because CRTs don’t explode like that 🙂

I set fire to my hair while brazing a frame once. I’ve also poked a small screwdriver right through my thumb and out through the nail – it swelled up as big as a golf ball.

bigyinn – Member
Merak, that clip is comedy gold for the sheer absurdity of that scenario!

+1 this – Surely Mr Bean played a hand in that sequence of events.

WTF were you doing to the chickens!

He worked for Bernard Mathews…

Very nearly took both my eyes out in one go, with a set of needle-nosed pliers.
Can’t remember the exact scenario, but I had something in the vice with a pin or screw stuck in it (I think it might have been an old hope caliper.) Anyway, gripping the pin with these pliers, with both hands, and pulling full force, the damn things slipped. Because it was straight in front of me, they flew back and up and the pliers hit me square between the eyes; leaving cuts on both sides of the bridge of my nose.

I have a friend who did exactly that, but lost his eye..

Nobby – Member
A former colleague of mine ended up with a broken nose & fractured skull whilst cleaning his teeth one morning.

Was it the morning after the night before and he was on another mans turf…?

whilst travelling to a job as a passenger in a pick up loaded with Hessian sacks the driver threw his fag out the window unknown to us it blew back round into the load of sacks and yes you can guess the next bit luckily we were only couple hundred yards from fire station so pulled into station where they had outside phone/intercom system i got a **** off response. well it was early morning then a head appeared at the window few minutes later the main door opens fire engine tries to come flying out and suddenly stops as he sees our van in front of station. we all laughed about it afterwards apart from our boss.. load destroyed van blackened and to add insult fire brigade sent us a bill..

Very nearly took both my eyes out in one go, with a set of needle-nosed pliers.
Can’t remember the exact scenario, but I had something in the vice with a pin or screw stuck in it (I think it might have been an old hope caliper.) Anyway, gripping the pin with these pliers, with both hands, and pulling full force, the damn things slipped. Because it was straight in front of me, they flew back and up and the pliers hit me square between the eyes; leaving cuts on both sides of the bridge of my nose.

I have a friend who did exactly that, but lost his eye..

I also did nearly exactly that, although mine was pulling a zip tie tight because it was a small one and couldn;t be bothered looking for a longer one. Pulled towards me and it pulled off and I stabbed my self in the face. I thought id put it straight into my eye as i couldn’t see out of my right eye for blood. Tried to keep calm and when up to the bathroom to see I’d actually stabbed myself right at the bottom of my eye brow, right on the edge of my socket (which I chipped a bit of skull off). 1mm lower and i’ve had thrust it into my right eye with enough force to put it into my brain.

Scarey scarey thought.

I had a close call with a bit of pipe in the inside of our shower. Had it open, replaced the solenoid valve, screwed up various bits (but still had the cover off), turned on the water and turned it on to check that it was working, cue an incredibly loud bang, and a small u shaped bit of plastic pipe shooting off over my shoulder at warp speed. Turned out I forgot to screw a couple of the screws holding the pipe system in, and that water is under quite high pressure in there. Oops. Fortunately the fix was just to plug the pipe back in and do up the screw, and it is fine now, but was a bit of a surprise at the time.

Here’s an actual riding one from years ago.

Coasting back up the gravelly road to the house I shared… at the exact moment where I’d usually slam on the anchors just in time, the front door opened and one of my housemates (a rather lovely blonde) suddenly appeared, smiled and said Hi. In that split second of distraction I completely forgot to brake and went head on at full speed into the six-foot high slate wall at the end of the road.

No helmet of course. Big dent in forehead, double vision, blood everywhere. Housemate was very sweet and led me off to the health centre to get patched up…

I cut through a mains cable with some snippers last weekend.

Fortunately I only proved to my wife that an RCD device works (long standing argument with her regarding plug covers to protect small fingers from being fried).

A bit like a conversation with my dad a few years ago – I was helping him put up some shelves, and was drilling the holes in the wall.

“What about this, dad, there’s a lightswitch here”
“Don’t worry, the light is above the switch”
“So?”
“So the cable must be above the switch”

You can guess the rest. Vapourised 1″ of drill bit, knocked me across the room, and blew all the fuses (this was pre-RCDs).

I can think of two gruesome ones involving my kid brother.. both around the same time with him being 3 or 4 years old and me being 8 or 9..

It was a hot summer day and my brother was hammering on the front door to get in, ringing the doorbell, shouting..
Mum was going mental.. ‘get round the back you ‘orrible little so and so.. ‘Dave, run and make that naughty little shit go round the back like he’s supposed to will you’ she instructed me..
Awesome, had I really just been given a free pass to administer a righteous kicking..!? You didn’t need to ask me twice, opportunities like this didn’t come up very often so I was up like a shot haring through to the hallway..
Through the glass in the front door I can see what appears to be loads of red paint, and on opening it there’s my tiny little brother bawling his eyes out covered from top to toe in claret.. Now I like to see him suffer but this is something else and I stop midswing and call mum..

after all the fuss has died down and she’s cleaned him off in the bath, the only wound on him is a tiny 3mm hole in the middle of his forehead.. apparently it turns out that he’d been running round the side of the house on his way home (like a good little boy) and run into a corner that had a little metal tack sticking out.. tiny hole loadsa blood..

The second one.. maybe later the same year, was on holiday at Selsey Bill (at that holiday park that went on to get blown clean off the face of the earth by a hurricane some years later)..
Mum and Nan had gone into Brighton shopping leaving me in charge of the boy.. no sooner had their car chugged out of sight, then my poor wee bro had scat off his little bike on the concrete/gravel drive, at speed.. and grazed both his nipples off.. 😯

I put him in the bath at the chalet and flagged down a neighbour to help.. poor little sod screamed until mum got back hours later, when she proceeded to apply the antiseptic..

his nips have grown back now

I was leaning back on my chair at school, balancing on the rear legs and nearly overcooked it. In a desperate attempt to stop falling I flung myself forwards again. It worked but, in the process, my face came slamming down towards the desk. Unfortunatly, I was sucking a biro with the lid on the top. The lid had a little hole in it that acted like an apple corer and it quickly cut a deep gouge through the roof of my mouth. The fleshy bit dangled down, it was about 1 inch long. Eating salt and vinigar crisps was agony for about 1 month after that.

My mum threw a fag butt into the garden when she was babysitting for us

Not an accident then….