Just knocked a glass of frissante all over my computer desk, splashed on to the monitor and has run down into the frame, so now the LCD keeps switching on and off (it's got a fancy pants 'touch/capacitive' power button), plus I've killed my mouse and maybe my keyboard (though it's working kind of OK just now)… BUUUUUUUGER!

That's what you get for drinking a girls drink.

did you manage to catch any drips in the glass?

You're loaded, just buy another one 🙂

it came with my dinner for £9 from Tesco… doesn't taste too bad actually! Going to finish the whole frickin bottle now to drown my sorrows 😥 👿

Frissante? What the bloody hell's that when it's at home?

Be thankful it wasn't a Minestrone Cup-a-Soup.

It's a pudding wine.

Frissante? What the bloody hell's that when it's at home?

Cheap Italian sparkling white wine, I think?

What's wrong with Irn Bru with a dash of gin?

Waste of Gin?

Stick a screw driver through the screen and touch the metal bit with your tongue. See if it makes you come. Might do. Not sure though.

WTF?

lol Swede.

Imagine that. You ram a posi drive right through the fecker and stick your tongue on it. Bobs your uncle, your legs buckle and you've shot your load in your pants with out so much as a stroke. With a little refinement, you have an orgasm machine. Dragons den. Millionaire. Debra's face!

What the **** you been smoking. Can I have some?

Just a small bottle grolsch. Gave the green up years ago. People said I talked utter nonsense and went off on wild imaginary tangents on it.

Cheap Italian sparkling white wine, I think?

for £9 from Tesco

Cheap? Allthepies has a point.

People said I talked utter nonsense and went off on wild imaginary tangents on it.

You do that anyway mate.
**** knows what you'd be like with a bit of MDMA in you but it'd be entertaining.