I’m presently looking around for a job as the contract I’m on is coming to an end. I’m covering for someone who’s returning so there’s no chance its going to be extended.

Jobwise, there is absolutely nowt where I am (North West) in my field. Its dead. And I can’t see it bucking up any time soon. In fact I reckon it’ll get a lot worse. So… joining the unemployed hoards looks clearly on the agenda. Woo and indeed hoo! I did the whole unemployment lark for a period last year and I doubt my sanity (such as it is) would survive doing it again.

The only place that appears to have anything worth applying for (or indeed anything AT ALL) is, predictably, the sprawling metropolis.

This would mean being away from the missus and the kids all week. And the hills and decent riding, obviously. But compared with the alternative, its the least worst option.

So… does anyone do this? Work away ALL week? A serious distance from home. How does it affect your sanity? Is it bearable? DO you become Alan Partridge? Do you sit weeping and rocking back and too of an evening?

Any advice or experiences greatly appreciated. Cheers.

WCA’s a good one to talk to. He regularly travels for work, and it gets on his wick somewhat. Hence the strange threads at 2 am sometimes…

I’d also be asking if it’s econmically vaible to have a place to stay in the smoke, travel at weekends and take home enough to make it worthwhile (may as you say be better for sanity than being on’t’dole)…or do something different & short term where you live?

Did it from October 2009 to November 2010. Helping the Government sell off the Channel Tunnel Rail Link. Down on the 06:11 from Wilmslow on Monday. Back on the 17:40 on the Friday. Just done my annual accounts. Cost over £20k in travel and expenses over the period….and that’s with living off M&S sandwiches every evening, And staying in the Ibis at Wembley.
Don’t recommend it unless you have some means of overcoming the boredom each evening.

I did for about 4-5 months. Very draining, but I was commuting 3hrs a day from London to Brighton then back to Ireland for the weekend and back to London on Sunday night. I lived with friends as I couldnt afford to live on my own/in a hotel, and that did make it much less depressing as there were people to talk to in the evening. Skype was brilliant to make sure you arent missing too much as well.
It would have been much easier if I could have:
worked from home 1 day a week/fortnight or more
travelled on Monday morning rather than Sunday night and Friday afternoon rather than Friday night
had decent time flights rather than 10:30
split a bit more of the travelling so I wasn’t constantly travelling

A lot of our friends in Ireland are doing it, commuting from Cork to Dublin, or Cork to Glasgow, sadly I think it is gonna be that way for them for a while too

I currently work in Sheffield and live north Bradford.

At first I rented a room in a house with a young professional couple who had a 3 year old. I ended up working longer hours as there was nothing to want to go home to, the commute back to the house was depressing because I knew I had nothing to do all evening, and my wife etc wasn’t there.

The couple tried to be inviting ie said I could use their living room etc, but it just felt uncomfortable being part of some one elses life so I ended up spending most of the time I was there in my room.

The one upside was that I got quite fit as I had nothing better to do in the evening…

If you can afford to rent your own place then I think it will make it more managable, but I think you are still going to have the same feelings of I dont want to be here, my life isnt here. It ended up being very much Monday-Friday no life, weekends had a life, but was over in a blink and didnt look forward to Monday mornings.

After 6 months I got so fed up that I now commute daily, which can be as much as 3 hours per day. However at least now I can look forward to getting home to my wife and son and I work 4 long days so I get a longer weekend.

Having said that I know some people that work away in the week and enjoy it, just wasnt for me.

There are a number of good homes in London where folks are looking for a bit of extra cash to cover there huge mortgages and so rent out a room, in a reasonably good area, on a weekday basis. If they get more than £4250 a year, it incurs tax and gets awkward. So most charge around £350 a month for this. Depends on connections, but travel down on Monday am. and back on Friday evening, actually not too bad. It means you get more work done too.

Only really doable (as a family with mortgage etc) financially imo if you’re freelance/contract and can mitigate the tax, and get a good daily rate, or if you’re supported by your employer. If you can squeeze your working week into 4 days, or work from home a bit it helps as well.

Emotionally- it depends how close you are to your family. Some people thrive on being away from their family with no responsibility, eating and drinking out every night without having to worry about getting home. Others don’t.
My wife worked away, in Nottingham, for a couple of years- spent the first two months commuting Sunday and Friday, living in an ibis- it was very hard on us all. She spent most nights holed up in her room.
We ended up renting a house and the family moving up there.

Loads of us work away from home.

We don’t see our families, we don’t get to ride our bikes !.

Its the rat race don’t you know.

The bills must be paid, its how the working man is kept in his place.

MTFU and suck it up, butter cup.

Join the rest of us miserables who “live” on the road.

I worked in Dublin for 12 months commuting from Birmingham. Money was great and the company I worked for rented me a house in a nice area etc etc.
Wife and son used to travel across for a month at a time to cut down on travelling etc but I found the time away from home affected me and my son who was only 3 at the time.
The money was great as I was on expenses for everything and was paid loads at the time, after 12 months I came back to B’ham and took a £20k pay cut thats how much I wanted back to normality.
If your desparate for work and cash then do it if not do something else it becomes very difficult and you lose a lot of quality time with the kids eg what happens if their birthday is on a Tuesday? you can’t be there. Think it through.

She spent most nights holed up in her room.

So she say’s! 🙂

I have on occasion, but if the commute is less than 3 hours each way I’ll commute (you don’t do much more than sleep at home that way though). A large percentage of the people I know either work away or commute, or do both (like come home mid-week).

It’s normal. You get used to it.

you’ll drink like a fish!

I used to do 2 days a week in London. The overnight involved food and beer with or without local mates.

Now I only do one day in town so it’s more bearable – just a long day: up at 5 back at 9 or 10.

Couldnt do 5 days. Could probably manage 3, but would probably not do it in a hotel. If I had to do 3, I would see if I could move into the spare room of my flat if my tenant would do it for a rent discount.

I love it. It’s made the bond w/mrs and family stronger, we love time together at weekends and it works well for both of us. I’d Second Mr Mingues’s suggestion of getting into a house, so you can have a bike / hobbies midweek (hotel’s descend into drinking / eating hell after more than a few weeks).

When I was at home, I found very little quality time together midweek, it’s much better at the moment. Job wise, it’s much better, as you have freedom to work where you like…this has a big effect on your relationship w/your employer.

Can’t recommend it highly enough.

I should add that my sister has a big property in central London so I’d have somewhere to stay and I’ve plenty of mates down there, so no shortage of company in the evenings.

I’d be looking at working freelance/contract so money not too bad. Its just the thought of being away from home all week. I might end up bitter and resentful.But reading Captain_Crashes reply, I’m sure that would be unlikely to happen. Its clearly not had that effect on him 😉

I’m the opposite right now in that my girlfriend is working in Sao Paulo and I am staying at home, working on some project proposals, in another city that is the equivalent of London – Edinburgh.

This for us is a short term solution, and for you, you should really try and think how long you could cope. Short term there are no major issues, and now that you have Skype, it is much better when talking mid-week. Also, you need to try and make good use of your mid-week free time too, such as going to the gym etc.

I for one could not do it long term, but obviously for you it means income and also potential work experience which will help when job hunting back in your home area.

Been traveling down from the Peak District to Oxfordshire to work for 2 years now (S Yorks and E Midlands was shut for business). I tried Monday-Friday lets and lodging but although most people I met needed the money they hadn’t thought out sharing their houses with lodgers (perhaps I am that antisocial). The cheapest way of staying down here has worked out as shared houses (which are infinitely better than the houses I used to share with students and climbers in Sheffield).

Wouldn’t pretend that it easy, it makes weekends with the wife & kids very precious and it makes my wife’s life a lot harder looking after the kids on her own during the week. On the plus side I do get out on my bike during the week to save the sanity.

Moving down here isn’t practical (mixture of job security, difference in prices between here and the Peak etc). Luckily its a good job so we manage to cover the extra costs most months (although my retirement plan is now a 6′ timber box).

You just have to regularly remind yourself (and your SO) its better than the alternative.

wife’s life a lot harder looking after the kids on her own during the week

That’s a key point…it’s hard for the Mrs if you have kids.

Binners I’ve said this before you need to tick London off in your to do list. We had someone who hated life here, bemoaned opportunities etc and I talked her into going. She phoned recently and said shes never coming back) and willingly admitted (unusual as we never got on well) that I was ‘right’. 😀

If its not you- comeback after a month OR whilst looking for something worthwhile as a permanent position back here. It keeps the wolves at bay.

I spent 8yrs in London and LOVED it. Manchester is a backwater village compared and we only moved to my other halfs situation.

I reckon- take a job down there whilst you look for something more longterm up here.

Plus you’ll have a lot of adventure and meet alot of new girls down there.

That’s a key point…it’s hard for the Mrs if you have kids.

Sexist. It’s hard on whoever’s at home looking after the kids. 😉

I did a year in Switzerland. Food, drink and apartment all on expenses. Great salary. Sounds wonderful right?

After 12 months I chose not to renew my contract as I couldn’t stand it any more.

Having said that, I took the job after 4 months of redundancy and if faced with redundancy again I would probably do the same again.

It can be horrible but then so can life. Do it while you have to but don’t let it destroy your family.

Standard STW protocol for this scenario is that anytime you are away from home you must devolve all, yes All, responsibility for personal decision making to the forum. HTH

Put it this way, its either that there London or….

Temping in the Council again?

COME ON! Plus its only short-term until you find something juicy and permanent up here 😀

Plus you’ve got Holmbury, Leith Hill/North Downs down there. 😀

The unappealing option of either unemployment or living away is the devil/deep blue sea conundrum.

Short-term, living in London/wherever would appear to be a no-brainer as you need to keep yourself in work. Money needs to come in, bills need to be paid, your CV needs to be kept ticking over (and may even be improved by your stint away if you present yourself as a grafter who will do whatever it takes). Bear in mind, however, that there are some costs you may not have considered. Rent’s an obvious one, but train travel on a Monday morning or Friday night is extremely pricy. You’re otherwise looking at driving, though try the M1 North on a Friday night just once and you might reconsider…

The biggest cost, however, is the emotional one. I lived abroad for a year, commuting weekly (sometimes daily) and it led me close to divorce.

It’s a really difficult one, and ultimately you’re the only one who knows your own circumstances. Personally, I’d avoid it like the plague, but it sounds as if you have no choice at all.

I did it for almost 18 months. It was a bind, but I was really lucky. Mrs Grips came to see me two nights a week, I was on expenses and I could get a good rate at a fab hotel. About as good as it gets… This may not help you unfortunately 🙂

My tip though would be to get a flat not a hotel. Or even a room. And take your bike, since it’s the best way to get around London and you can get the cheapest accommodation when you’re miles from a tube stop.

So, it seems theres “working away”, and theres working away.

I’ve had to do it the hard way, no Xs, no assistance, forever !.

Looks like theres some soft types on here, or am I just hopelessly bitter and twisted…..

You sound like you’re young, if you’ve not done it, try it.
It might just toughen you up, a bit.
😈

I’m 8months into working in Glasgow when home is Bristol. I’ve got another 24months to go as well.

I see it as an opportunity rather than an inconvenience. A chance to explore part of the world you may not have visited previously. Maybe a chance for your family to take the odd city break with you.

It’s easy to sit and moan about how unfair my life may be but when I make the effort to get off of my backside and make the most of the opportunities in front of me then it’s suddenly not as bad.

Of course, it needs a supportive other half & more than a passing interest in your job to make it work.

I used to work with a guy who lives in Hull and worked the week in Stoke – which to be fair isn’t the distance you are talking but then does distance matter other than on the days of the commute. To be fair he was seen as necessary and so work picked up his hotel & expenses and he didn’t usually get in to work until lunchtime Monday and left Lunchtime Friday. TBF to him though he did work 10 or 11 hour days the rest of the week (for one thing it used up time and stopped him drinking too much every night). He was also lucky as he was mates with a few of us so generally we would go out 1 evening a week.

I also worked in Burntwood with a guy who commuted from Huston, Texas. Honest. It was only every second weekend he went home and he did have family in the UK who he could visit on the other weekend (he is English). I can’t imagine how much he was being paid by the company, but to mitigate cost, his wife was in a good job with American Airlines so he got free business class flights on any of the 1st division carrier to and from the US.

The question is will you get offered a job in London? The market has so many of us now everywhere (unemployed) that I am finding that employers outside ones immediate area either want the commitment of someone who will relocate or they find a candidate closer to home. I have had a couple of potentials turn me down as I am not in a position to relocate and even though I have stated that I would live away from home in the week (salary allowing) I have been knocked back.

The question is too will they only pay market rate? Can you find a job, like my 1st example, where you are so valuable that they will cover living/travelling expenses on top of the salary. I hope for your sake that you can find one, but at the moment it’s an employers market and they may well find someone to do the job simply for the salary quoted.

Sorry to be negative, but I am a realist and I can’t see any point trying to make things look better than they are.

And Boris keeps telling people to get on their bikes…

Binners, what sort of work do you do?

I’ve done it as a contractor.

Life basically conisted of going to bed 9-10pm sunday, getting up at around 5am, commuting to whereever the job was, staying in a hotel on my own eating sandwhiches or dining alone in restaurants and then getting back home about 10-11pm friday absolutely knackered.

Eventually I quit, went to uni, did an MSc and changed industry.

I didn’t mind the actual being in a hotel room actually. Got computer, got DVDs, got telly, I brought with me stuff to amuse myself – books, camera, guitar etc.

Binners, forgive me if you’ve answered this before, but what line of work are you in?

I’m a graphic designer fella

I currently work in Sheffield and live north Bradford.

Eh – you can spit from Sheff to Bradford.

3 Hrs commute a day – what hellish time do you choose to use the M1/M62 (other routes – quite picturesque ones are available)?

We used to do Matlock to Bradford and back every day at the old company.

As for working away I set up on my own in January and 90% of my work has been away. I live near Matlock and have carried out a lot of work in Taunton & Middlesbrough as the extremes – about 6 months in ‘Boro (stayed in Redcar).

Fortunately I’m quite good at latching onto folk in pubs (whether they like it or not 😉 ) and have made some good friends – as a drinker, I do end up drinking (and spending) quite a bit though.

My digs vary from £20 per night fleapits to the current £67 per night Premier Inn, where I’m typing from now near Ross-On-Wye. Curently away and working nights – now that is crapola. Fortunately the money is pretty damned good as a consolation.

As for family, I can handle time on my own and like my own space even when at home, but it gets the Mrs and daughter down a bit, me being away so much – needs must I’m afraid at the moment though and I’d much rather be at home myself than in some scabby B&B – something that often gets overlooked when the Mrs expresses her displeasure at me taking off to the pub most nights.

You’d easily fit in at the Admiral Duncan as well Binners!

molgrips – Member
I didn’t mind the actual being in a hotel room actually. Got computer, got DVDs, got telly, I brought with me stuff to amuse myself – books, camera, guitar etc.

DVD’s and a camera to amuse oneself in a hotel room eh? 😉

I bet the other residents love you as well – taking your geetar.

you can spit from Sheff to Bradford.

I wouldn’t spit on Bradford if it were on fire

I’m sure someone will be along in a minute to call you racist Charlie… 😉

Or insensitive… 😉

I’m sure someone will be along in a minute to call you racist Charlie.

well, usually I wait for ages, then 3 come along at once