Mountain bike, so no rear pockets

Must be:

Reasonably athletic cut
Good quality material
long sleeved & wearable for 9 months of the year
full length zip
black or other muted colours

Must not be:

Overtly Branded
A bin bag made of polyester
a roadie Jersey

Am I just being picky or is this actually quite hard to find?

Wiggles DHB all day long for me. Excellent quality and reasonable prices. Loads to choose from

Was gonna say Raphas brevet Jersey, but if you are hung up on the roadie thing…..

I’ve worn mine more off road than on.

Some from Stolen Goat?

I have one of these;

http://www.chainreactioncycles.com/it/en/polaris-am-pilgrim-long-sleeve-jersey-ss15/rp-prod90743

And one of these (but in a different design);

http://www.wiggle.co.uk/morvelo-the-unity-long-sleeve-enduro-jersey/

The Polaris one is a little bit thicker so I tend to wear that one in Autumn and winter although its good for chilly spring days as well. The Morvelo one is actually quite cool but when worn with a long sleeve base layer underneath it is perfect on cooler days.

Both highly recommended.

morvelo and Polaris fails the overt branded and “bin bag”

Rapha? Off road? do they not hunt you down and rip it from your back? 😆

Stolen Goat: fails the roadie test.

I’m not entirely anti roadie jersey, but is there not something without rear pockets?

I’ve got a Berghaus wicking sort of thing – not a full length zip though 🙁
Worth popping in to an outdoor shop of some sort though..

Planet-X Primevera? Fits all except the roadie tag. It’s cheap as well.

You’re challenge is you’ve basically described a roadie Jersey…then said you don’t want it roadie. That’s a challenge that is.

http://torm.cc/

Bregante, Aye, was looking at those, would be perfect without the rear pockets, I’ve one of their short sleeved jerseys and they are well made.

Might have to be a nice roadie after all.

Gap in the market?

Those torm jerseys look lovely – but they’re roadie totally.

I might ask for one for my birthday.

Any more brands like Morvelo / Torm / Stolen Goat – classy as rapha but without the absurd veblen goods price tag?

Have a look here, some nice stuff albeit quite roadie. http://www.alwaysriding.co.uk/

It’s the full-length zip that’s stumped me.

Otherwise I’d say have a look at Mavic’s less in-your-face jerseys.

I’ve got a couple of the older Switchback style and they’re a cut above the rest of my MTB clothing – nice close fit and long in the body, breathable but also warmer than most plain polyester jobs, bold colours but not lairy.

If you really need a full-zip jersey with no pockets then maybe one of those roadie softshell jersey/jacket hybrids?

http://www.dare2b.com/activity/road-biking/cycle-jerseys?solr_gender=710,139

These have been recommended to me as being excellent quality for the money.

I don’t have any as I just splurged on a load of Pearl Izumi and Gore Bike Wear (expensive)

chakaping

The full zip is a preference not an absolute, I’ll take a look at the mavic stuff thanks

Any more brands like Morvelo / Torm / Stolen Goat – classy as rapha but without the absurd veblen goods price tag?

yes!! this and mountain biker-ish!

I have last year’s Royal Stage Jersey. A year on, still looks as good as new

http://www.tenn-outdoors.co.uk/mountain-biking/mens/jerseys/
http://www.madison.co.uk/products/cycling/clothing-eyewear/tops-jerseys/trail-men-s-short-sleeved-jersey-black-x-large/

Ground Effect B52.

I have a Morvelo MTB top – it’s nice, but much more basic than a Rapha top, pulls really easily and I’ve ripped it twice.

I like the look of those Torm tops – a few brighter colours would be nice!

I’m gonna have to buy one of the burgundy torm tops before rapha sue them and you can’t get them anymore. Gorgeous.

Those Torm jerseys are very well made, good quality jerseys. The short sleeved ones are a closer fit than long sleeved apparently. I’m a small in most jerseys, but med Torm fits me.

full length zip is a bit of a roadie-specific limitation, possibly?

zipped

http://www.evanscycles.com/products/endura/mt500-long-sleeve-jersey-ec019861

none zipped

http://www.evanscycles.com/products/endura/mt500-burner-ii-long-sleeve-jersey-ec060409

I’ve got the version without a zip and it ticks most of the other boxes, suprisingly snug but not roadie tight and sleeves will just fit over pads (as my name suggests, I need em…), nice use of different materials so forearms are toughened but other areas are more breathable. Looks and feels like a quality item. Logo on chest but fairly discreet, unlike, say, MORVELO jerseys for instance. Which also size really weird, they seem to stitch small sleeves onto large torsos (and you’ve met me, I’m not some weird T-rex build!).

IXS do jerseys exactly as you describe, but not in long sleeve. I just wear a long sleeve baselayer under them.

I’d say either Mavic or the Gore Alp X stuff – no cheap but very good.

I’ve got a Gore Alp-X thermo. Black, long sleeved, full zip and a good fit.

Works in temperatures from zero (with a base layer and possibly gilet) to low teens. Not sure if that exactly matches your 9 months criteria but I’d say the only months you can’t wear it are June-Aug/Sept

Mavid Red Rock?

IXS do jerseys exactly as you describe

fail the polyester clause.

This is the nearest I have in my wardrobe. Dunno if you can find any normal sizes left. Really nice feel to the cloth.
http://www.chainreactioncycles.com/royal-java-shot-1-4-zip-jersey-long-sleeve/rp-prod69223

Their colours have all gone a bit WAY!… (I blame ENDURO)