Viewing 34 posts - 1 through 34 (of 34 total)
  • Cat Farts?
  • five7five
    Free Member

    now i know this isnt what you might call a buring question but…
    i was at a friends the other night and thier dog perpetually farted.
    as a cat owner i began thinking…i have experienced the delights of a cat opening its mouth so wide to yawn that it almost turns its head inside out whilst emitting the foulest odour known to man. they say that rodents die of fear long before a cat inflicts a fatal blow but the cats breath would surely take out the mouse first?…but i never remember my felines eructing.
    so to my question…do cats fart?…i suspect not since surely mother nature would not any animal to be put in the position of having wipe its own rectum with its own tongue (whilst being in something of a contorted position) AND have the very real risk of farting in your own mouth!
    anyone got any facts on this matter?

    coffeeking
    Free Member

    Never noticed any of our cats doing it. Seems unlikely too as I think the gases are more likely to come from veg and things other than meat, which cats dont really eat but dogs do.

    RustySpanner
    Full Member

    Just what I needed after (during?) the continuing religious debate!

    I’ve just asked our Liquorish if she farts and she said no, she’s a lady so she holds it in.

    five7five
    Free Member

    both my cats eat vegetables…admittedly its not five a day…but never a rumble.

    coffeeking
    Free Member

    Your cats eat veg?! All 4 of ours only occasionally nibbled grass lol.

    DaveGr
    Free Member

    Tommy the cat has done a few silent but deadly ones over the years, usually while sitting on my lap and then looks at me as though implying it was me !!

    MrNutt
    Free Member

    I had cats, they used to fart, i can actually recall when one of them was pregnant it used to actually be able to clear the entire room of people!

    grizzlygus
    Free Member

    Very occasionally mine do, but being cats, they are very discreet about it.

    dave_rudabar
    Free Member

    My cats fart (or that’s who I blame if i let one go!) 😆

    duntmatter
    Free Member

    Yep, cats drop real clangers. Mine used to eat toast, chips, and tinned tomatoes, and lived to 21!

    Poindexter
    Free Member

    They sometimes do when you stamp on them. But not always. About 78 times out of a hundred…

    duntmatter
    Free Member

    🙄

    mrsflash
    Free Member

    Yes Cosmo our little one occasionally does horrendously stinky silent ones.

    epicyclo
    Full Member

    Nothing viler,and they’re so sneaky with it.

    Ours knows to clear out of the room immediately after, all we need is to get it to anticipate now.

    donald
    Free Member

    They go out into the neighbours garden and bury them

    Poindexter
    Free Member

    They go out into the neighbours garden and bury them

    Tell me about it, nothing worse than digging up a Bronx cheer whilst tending ones borders.

    RooleyMoor
    Free Member

    our cat farts, then gets up and walks off. It must be thinking “i’m not sticking around that smell”

    tinker-belle
    Free Member

    My little boy cat regularly farts when enjoying a stretch (normally on my lap or when sitting next to me on the couch), then gets that pleased “look/smell what I just did” look.

    Must just be a bloke thing across all species…

    waihiboy
    Free Member

    yes our does if you pick her up sometimes.

    i hate it when they sit next to you then start cleaning their a*se!

    Gary_M
    Free Member

    We’ve got 2 cats, one of them farts quite often in the evenings when she’s lying beside me. I haven’t heard a parp from the other one though.

    duntmatter
    Free Member

    ‘Bronx cheer’! I haven’t heard that one since the glorious days of whoopee cushions.

    geetee1972
    Free Member

    Our cats are very gassy. So much so that you can pick them up and play them like bag pipes. 😀

    scraprider
    Free Member

    mrs scraprider blamed our furry head for farting , i reacon it was her tbh

    UncleFred
    Free Member

    My ex-wifes little fecker used to sneek into the bedroom and curl up on her pillow between our heads, always arse facing me. Little sh1t used to sense me waking up and all I’d see is it’s little ring piece unpucker as it slipped one out.

    Just what you want at 6am.

    I used to get a b0ll0cking for throwing it against the wall.

    geetee1972
    Free Member

    UncleFred that’s **** hillarious! Would the old ‘cat against the wall’ trick be the reason you’re now divorced?

    UncleFred
    Free Member

    Nope, that would be the “I’m a lying psycho bitch who wasted 7 years of your life and then tried to make your life hell” reason.

    geetee1972
    Free Member

    Well look on the brightside. a) It was only seven years, some people only discover this after many more years. b) sounds like she only ‘tried’ rather than suceeded. c) You get more time to ride the bike.

    Lummox
    Full Member

    my old cat smelled of marmite when dropping little kitty love puffs

    SiB
    Free Member

    Just going off on a little tangent – who can fart AND pedal at same time?? If you’ve never thought about it try it next time you’re out!

    taka
    Free Member

    squeeze them just after they have eaten it will kill u 😈

    Singlespeedpunk
    Free Member

    SiB,

    It can be done but its a black belt fixie rider trick…real muscle control needed 🙂

    SSP

    SiB
    Free Member

    SSP
    Haven’t got that much control, any tips?

    Singlespeedpunk
    Free Member

    Haven’t got that much control, any tips?

    A spicy curry and cycling shorts you don’t mind binning 😉

    SSP

    five7five
    Free Member

    its interesting that most of you have farting cats and very pleasing that i dont…given the tales you tell.
    i have had a very effluent encounter with a kitten once…i hasten to add this is not a double entendre so think cats not pussie.
    it happenend a few years ago on a beatiful summers day…i was perched in my reclining chair, a bottle of cold beer and a slice of lime in the arm rest and shades protecting me from the dazzling rays.
    suddenly up onto my lap popped a 10 week old kitten, as cute as you like.
    it instantly began purring and winding around my arms rubbing up against my bronzed (read lobster red) torso. it threw itself flat onto my lap rolling and turning as they do making itself both comfortable and cute.
    i gently stroked this little fluffy ball…but thought it it feels wet (we are still feline here so consentrate).
    i touched its back and tail…wet…its head wet…i looked it my arms and hands…wet. how so me thinks?…check possible sources me thinks…no check for odours me thinks…AAAAAhhhh fuk cat sh*t!!!!
    i am on my feet before the kitten has chance to retract its claws which are in my shorts by now….get off!… you little….piece of sh…flaling and flicking i manage to detatch the terrified feline.
    by now the stench of the diarroea ridden monster was becoming fuller in my nostrils…sniffing cautiously at limbs and digits it appears i am liberally covered in this noxious fluid from head to foot….stripping off in the garden with the kind of speed normally assosiated with a first shag i bolt for the bathroom passing a perplexed missus as i sprint!!
    worse was to follow!

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