We decided to go to an amazing sheltered beach tonight.
I’m here now and there’s a bloody bmw turned up with a big bloody jetski.
We’re all trying to have fun on the beach while this big bloody motorised thing is making a racket destroying the peace.
Before anyone says anything I had a go on one once. They are fun for about 10 minutes. Might be good shotgun/lasertag practice from the beach.

I thought this was going to be a thread about a Russian remake of West Side Story. Imagine my disappointment.

Buy the beach?

Better not say anything, suggest you spend the evening complaining on an obscure cycling forum instead.

Using jetski… In the sea…. Bastards !

Are you playing Snooker, or maybe Golf ?

Silence required for both of those apparently.

Who are you calling obscure?

We’re quite scure, I’ll have you know.

Cougar – Moderator
I thought this was going to be a thread about a Russian remake of West Side Story. Imagine my disappointment.

I’m actually with iolo on this one; great fun but I imagine a PITA if you’ve gone to a secluded beach hoping for a bit of nookie evening peace.

Damn, I missed the Sharkski caption off the photo. Bugger.

Can’t be that sheltered if a BMW can pull up and drop a jet ski in.

No Count, and Cougar. I got the gag. VG.

I hate them.

I kayak a lot in Torbay area and there are so many irresponsible owners who have no idea of the exclusion zones, speed limits and conservation. Without exception they are all fat feckers in wet suits that must need spraying on.

“Oh look a seal, let’s raz our tits off to get a quick look at it … wonder why it’s gone?”

And also they spoil my silence as I paddle along. I’m definitely 100% nimby about them.

I’m with the jetski haterz. But then a friend of mine was only about a foot away from being killed by one (that’s how far away she was from where it tore apart her Laser).

I hate the noise of those things, summer day along the gower all you can hear is wuuurm wuuuurm wuuuurm wuuurm wuuuurm wuuurm wuuuurm wuuuurm.

Are we a swift vote away from adding Jetskis to the list of things that STW would ban when the revolution comes?

Come the revolution I will be Jet Skiing up and down the canals taking pot shots at those damm bike riders tearing up and down the tow paths like they own them and chucking little bags of dog eggs at them 😈

/adds mikwsmith to the list

Yeah but I will be on the JetSki, just your try and catch me

 

a bloody bmw turned up with a big bloody jetski.

They usually go hand in hand

We decided to go to an amazing sheltered beach forest path ramble tonight.
I’m here now and there’s a bloody bmw turned up with a big bloody jetski mountain bike.
We’re all trying to have fun on the beach walk while this big bloody motorised 29er thing is making a racket destroying the peace.
Before anyone says anything I had a go on one once. They are fun for about 10 minutes. Might be good shotgun/lasertag practice from the beach tea shop.

FTFY

We decided to go to an amazing sheltered beach forest path ramble tonight.
I’m here now and there’s a bloody bmw turned up with a big bloody jetski mountain bike.
We’re all trying to have fun on the beach walk while this big bloody motorised 29er thing is making a racket destroying the peace.
Before anyone says anything I had a go on one once. They are fun for about 10 minutes. Might be good shotgun/lasertag practice from the beach tea shop.

FTFY

I went to the beach earlier in the year and there were loads of kids screaming and laughing! Ruddy ignorant parents – can’t they take them off to a soft play centre or theme park.

thing is with jetskiers its just not much fun out there for them without being able to show off to someone else. The sea is f**kin massive and there’s loads of space for everyone. They just don’t buy jetskis to bu&&er off and have some fun on their own, they need attention. You go to the coast down my way and everyones having their own fun, paddling, swimming, kayaking, sailing, fishing boats etc and everyone’s happy. then some tw*t in a RR Sport turns up with big blinged up wheels and pops his jetski in the water and spends the next hour thrashing up and down buzzing anyone who he thinks is paying him any attention.

I had the same thing happen once on the mountain top above cwmcarn with a little sh&t on a scrambler bike buzzing us and turning round and doing it again whilst we were just riding along on a big cross country loop one sunday (1996 so yep, it was called cross country then…)In the end the shpwers of stones were just getting too much so my mate who had had enough knocked the little fu&*er off and pulled his helmet off and told him to fu&* off.

If I could swim fast enough to catch a jetski i’d prob do the same. It’s the noise, it’s just like some idiot razzing a scrambler round the otherwise quiet woods on a sunday afternoon. If they were just passing through, fine but it’s the revving, back and forth etc…

Fine out at sea, do whatever but like I said, they want attention really and it’s us poor fu&*ers who have to pay….

What’s the difference between a JetSki and a Vacuum Cleaner ?
The Vacuum Cleaner has the dirtbag on the inside.

The Vacuum Cleaner has the dirtbag on the inside.

I imagine most STW’ers have Dysons, daahhrrling.

thing is with jetskiers its just not much fun out there for them without being able to show off to someone else. The sea is f**kin massive and there’s loads of space for everyone. They just don’t buy jetskis to bu&&er off and have some fun on their own, they need attention

Please ,please look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me,look at me on my jet ski …please

knobbers

If jetski’s are scramblers, then wakeboarding tow boats are the tanks.

Slow, noisy, vast ammounts of exhaust funes, and if there’s not enough wind then trying to sail through their wake is like trying to ride a mountainbike accross a ditch (which invariably the fat chav driving it finds hilarious so does it again).

It’s like someone looked at water-skiing and thought “how can I make this more obnoxious for everyone else”.

I was coming back from france once into poole harbour on a ferry and a jetskiing tw$t decides to buzz the ferry the whole way in. Its like he’s doing us a favour or something, giving us something magnificient to watch. If I wasnt worried about littering (or getting arrested) i’d have quite happily spent twenty minutes trying to throw all the full sickbags at him… I’m not a hateful person and not really prone to sweeping generalisations, i’m quite live and let live and relaxed about most things but i really really can’t stand jetskis.

What you need is a 13ft beachcaster fishing rod loaded with a string of hooks and a 7oz lead weight.

Get practicing with casting.

They certainly are a pain and almost all have no insurance, friend had quite a lot of damage done to his boat after it was hit by a jetskier. Horrible things.

burko73 has it about right about most jetski’s, if they were just passing by on a journey to somewhere it would be fine, but invariably they just stay in the same bay buzzing up and down. I’m not sure if its attention seeking, lack of experience/knowledge/scared of going further out to sea or just boredom. I’ve rented a few jetskis and I reckon its boredom, they’re fun for 20 minutes, after that you need a purpose, otherwise you just end up going round in circles, stopping suddenly and accelerating suddenly.

Jetski’s dont need the flat water that is typically found in sheltered bays & close inshore, so I really dont get why they cant do their thing away from others.

Wakeboarders on the other hand, they need flat water, really flat water, so I can understand (I have been known the wakeboard) why they would be closer in shore/in the sheltered bays. But still they should be taking into consideration others and generally not be a nuisance/danger to others.

I liken jetskiing to buying a massive sports bike and riding it up and down the local pub car park or razzing a scrambler around a flat town sports field. Boring after about 3 seconds, pointless noisy and very annoying for everyone else in the world.

I was at mudeford quay earlier this yr and the whole place was being buzzed by a few idiots on jetskis, when they came back in through the harbour entrance matey on the biggest, loudest one was nursing a can of Stella whilst driving back in, classy. He was shirtless, loud shorts, loads of tats and looking at us lot on the quay with an “you can’t help looking at me cos I’m so cool” look whereas most of us on the quay are looking at him thinking” you’re a cock, hope you don’t have any kids”

I imagine most STW’ers have Dysons, daahhrrling.

I thought it was all wooden floors and log burners.

Not keen on jet skis. The noise is pretty instrusive and can be heard miles away. Loch Lomond is a good example. Two people razzing on jet skis reducing the amenity of the place for people miles around.

I thought it was all wooden floors and log burners.

That carpeted garage won’t clean itself.

This thread is making me want to hire a jet ski…

Can we add this to the first world problems thread? Ridiculous

Ban them.
And cull their owners.

If they are ok by Kenny Powers they are OK by me