I’m on day 3 of a detox* diet. 25 to go.

What better way to reward/punish myself on day 29 than with some killer cheese combo? Right now a simple, humble grilled cheese sandwich/buttery cheese on toast sounds like unattainable paradise. No fuss, just the unadulterated flavour and fullness of cheese at its (cooked) best?

Firm believer in simple is best. Other classic is thick sharp cheddar and Spanish onion on buttered crusty cob. Epic.
Simplest of all is baked camembert around a camp fire. With sooty fingers.

O by the deadened gaze of Woden’s Other eye, can I bear the tortured topsy-turvey world where food is punishment and hunger is yet more punishment? Any more quinoa or courgette and I’m going to break.

Cheese please. Best of?

*Personally mildly skeptical of most ‘detox’ claims but have done this one before and lost a load of weight/ felt energised so there it is.

Nope. Think you’ve nailed the two winners right there.

Firm believer in simple is best

I’d usually agree with you, but if I decided to punish myself for no good medical reason I’d want a proper blow-out at the end of it to reward myself, which ironically I’d do as cheese gives me terrible wind.

Tartiflette, when you absolutely, positively have to gas everyone in the room, accept no substitutes.

Link

Cheese is a detox diet?!?! Sign me up.

or Carrs. Depending on your urges.

Tartiflette

You dirty, dirty man. It makes a doner kebab resemble a superfood salad. I want it. And I want it until I can’t want it any more.

Top marks Stoner for taking ‘cheese delivery device’ to it’s literal end. Wtaf is that? Looks very much like something I saw at Le Musée de l’Inquisition. Right about now I reckon I could get my fat-head under there and go flip-top. 👿

Tartiflette

I always fly back with a lump of Reblochon.

Tartiflette for tea this weekend.

I think you may have hit the winning combo first time but, for the sake of variety, how about a decent jaw aching cheddar, with branston pickle on a freshly baked sourdough?

I always fly back with a lump of Reblochon

Or two 😉

Halloumi. Just stand in front of the cooker and mainline it from the pan slice by slice until you dessicate.

Can’t believe no one has stepped in with a cheese and pineapple hedgehog

Fried cheese sandwich, even better than grilled. For extra decadence Stilton inner melted layer and fried crispy cheddar on the outer.
Plus you can claim it’s a proper chef recipe, ultimate cheese toastie

Can’t believe no one has stepped in with a cheese and pineapple hedgehog

I can:
A) It is no longer the 1970s
B) We are not Phillistines

We are looking for best cheese delivery method, not worst.

PS: I have already had my lunch and now I want a grilled cheese sandwich. Curse you STW.

Macaroni cheese, with more cheese sauce than pasta, more like a thick soup of cheesy wankfest, with loads of black pepper and a suitably strong cheese grated on top….

A) It is no longer the 1970s
B) We are not Phillistines

C) Only gypsies eat hedgehogs

😀 I’m calling a winner!

Riddoch, as much as that J*mie *liver person annoys me – I have to admit that the grilled*-cheese toastie video-recipe you linked was despicably perfect. It even wears a crown ffs.

A crown of crispy, fried, golden cheddar cheese to you. I look forward to day 29 with the kind of animated, twitchy desperation normally reserved for more exotic brands of mental illness. I thank you from the bottom of my soon-to-be ex-ventricles

*It’s fried!

best cheese delivery mechanism:

In honesty, i don’t care how you bring it, just bring it.

That video:

[video]https://youtu.be/WZOgBrgzQ2A[/video]

I’m going to honour Rannoch’s stilton augmentation, and go with sourdough toast, (thanks franksinatra). Sort of glad it wasn’t Nigella cooking. Too much is too much 😀

There are, in my opinion, 2 outstanding ways of delivering cheese.

1. Tartiflette. Simply a masterpiece in my eyes.
2. On it’s own. I just want some good cheese, something blue, a mature cheddar and maybe some goats cheese. And that’s it, I shall eat it on it’s own, washed down with a glass of Port and I shall be as happy as can be.

And the top pic, that’s not grilled, it’s fried.

Oh I want tartiflette SO MUCH RIGHT NOW…

Rachel

You are welcome.

Next question though, what to drink with it? (Not really a question as the answer is obviously a mug of tea)

Then you need to think about the general environment of consumption. I front of the tele? At the table with STW to read (print or iPad?)? Post bike ride for maximum enjoyment…?

The list goes on.

Not sure about that tartiflette recipe, P-Jay – there’s not even any cream in it! It’s like a “healthy options” tartiflette…

And that’s just wrong.

Rachel

edit:

It might be helpful to know that locals suggest washing tartiflette down with wine or hot tea, to prevent a “cheese stone” forming in the stomach.

— https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2014/feb/27/how-to-cook-perfect-tartiflette

😆

Next question though, what to drink with it? (Not really a question as the answer is obviously a mug of tea)

Mug of tea is correct. The second round with a pint of local golden ale, draught, from the carry-out. Third one with a Merlot.

At home. May listen to some classical music. Probably Sibelius. Most likely Symphony No 5 in E flat major op82:

If music be the food of love then may also the hot melted cheese burst forth at precisely 1min 10secs. Sweet Cheesus! The tartiflette can wait a further month when recovered,

[video]https://youtu.be/BDUhu-c0f3U[/video]

Not sure about that tartiflette recipe, P-Jay – there’s not even any double cream in it

No cream needed in tartiflette, the cheese gives your the moisture and creaminess, perhaps with a touch of white wine.

^ So much for delayed gratification! That felt cold, cheap and nasty 😯

Well I’ve never linked Sibelius 5 with a cheese toasty before now.

Intravenously.

Good solid cheddar, butter and Jacobs crackers plus nice crunchy pickled onions, nom!

Cheese on Cheese.

You can melt chedder onto haloumi.

Tartiflette made and in the oven. \o/

Rachel

baked Camembert with garlic cloves in, with warm crusty bread (and a nice glass of malbec)

Can’t argue with tartiflette or aphex2k on warm cheese delivery.

Cold cheese is best delivered on aldi rosemary crackers.

Go to a good cheese-mongery, smell the Munster, smell it until you can’t inhale without a gag reflux. That’ll curb your desires for a few days. Repeat until you are allowed some cheese.
Go back to the cheese shop buy some Munster, let it air for a bit then devour it with crusty bread. Or make a really smelly tartiflette with it….smelly cheese heaven!!