Ebay WTF: This Is Not An Ebike

by
October 25, 2016

‘That’s not a bike, it’s a motorbike!’. If you’re playing ‘Ebike Story Bingo’, you’re on to a winner if this is on your card. However, this is not a bike or an ebike, it’s a motorbike. Hate it, love it, burn it with fire – feel free to post appropriately in the comments below.

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If Cylons rode bikes?

This thing of wonder/horror is available to buy now on ebay (where else?). The listing calls it an ‘M55 Terminus Bicep Limited Edition Ebike’. But this is not an ebike. Well, not as we know it anyway – the listing explains:

When you unleash the 2000W motor in ‘Off-Road’ mode, the bike will reach a flying speed over 40MPH. For on road use the bike is limited to 15.5MPH via a dongle that reduces the power outlet to 250W. It is then classified as a normal bicycle.

At 2000W you’re going to need motorbike licensing and appropriate trails to ride it off road, otherwise you’d be in breach of the law/a dick.

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Is it just us, or is that the face of the devil?

The seller describes themselves as ‘an avid E-Bike collector’. They clearly aren’t short of a bob or two (or they weren’t when they bought it anyway), as it apparently cost £38,000 new in 2013. So let’s add ‘It’s not any cheaper than a car’ to that Ebike Bingo sheet, eh? Although this one is available for the Buy-It-Now price of £15,950.

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Transformers, robots in disguise…

The product description states:

Made from space grade aluminium and carbon fibre, its a beautiful looking bike packed with an array of CNC machined perfectionism.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and opinions in the office are divided. Space grade aluminium sounds good though – certainly better than cola-can grade. And you’d hope that aluminium and carbon fibre would give a lighter bike right. Because ‘I bet it’s heavy and handles like a tank’ just got marked off on that bingo card.

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Steam punk-arama

Who said that? We heard you: ‘I can admire the technology, but it’s just not for me’. According to the listing:

During the development and construction of these bikes no expense was spared to improve the bicycle experience. A radical take on what can be achieved on 2 wheels, the Terminus comes with a 2,000 watt motor, the brushless geared mid drive motors offer vast silent power. Sold with two keys, one limiting speed to 17 mph for street legal usage and an unlimited key making the M55 with the top motor selection capable of speeds up to 50 mph, this speed is matched by Hope Tech V2 Evo hydraulic disk brakes making sure you can slow down when you need to. Combining this power with rider input, the M55 boasts a maximum pedal assisted range of up to 75 miles making this dual function bike the ultimate in both downhill racing and green commuting.

Depending on your outlook, this is either a shining example of what can be achieved when no expense is spared, or a shining example of ‘just because you can, doesn’t mean you should’.

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Is it just us, or are these bars rather narrow?

We’ll leave it there, but we’ll be sure to watch the comments. First person to get a Full House makes the coffee.

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