Things that really do need to be invented.

Viewing 38 posts - 1 through 38 (of 38 total)
  • Things that really do need to be invented.
  • dingabell
    Member

    Just had to wash out three paint rollers. It took about 15 minutes to get them halfway clean. What a waste of time. Now, if someone invented a machine I could just pop them in and leave them to clean themselves, I’d be one happy bunny.

    Premier Icon tomhoward
    Subscriber

    Dishwasher?

    fasthaggis
    Member

    Affordable jetpacks

    dingabell
    Member

    Has anyone actually used that Dandy Pro contraption?
    Seems a bit dubious and who on earth decided to call it that?
    Sod it. I’m going to buy one and report my findings to anyone else on here who cares/doesn’t have a life.

    Premier Icon garage-dweller
    Subscriber

    Lycra that makes porky mamils look slimmer and more athletic?

    Premier Icon DavidB
    Subscriber

    Things that don’t get lost

    Male contraceptive pill

    sunnrider
    Member

    Lightweight hydraulic gears for mtb
    Lightweight electronic gears for mtb
    Perpetual motion electrical battery charger

    Premier Icon Northwind
    Subscriber

    Some sort of incompetent-project-manager repellant spray.

    dingabell
    Member

    Pocket sized horse DNA tester that you can stick in your dinner to discover if Black Beauty is currently residing in your Ikea meatballs.

    Well, I’ve already had the idea but not invented it as such… But when I had to drive round the Crook area of Sheffield when my GF was living there, I frequently found I’d get to the bottom of a steep hill, hit a T-junction and be unable to lean forward to see round walls / pedestrians etc, due to the seatbelt locking up.

    So please feel free to nick the idea and invent a button which over-rides the pendulum, seatbelt locking system, ta.

    dingabell
    Member

    My wife used to use a Clunk Clip which lets you have some slack on the seat belt and releases it when the belt is jerked. It’s probably illegal now.

    Pocket sized DNA tester that you can stick in your child to discover if a cuckoo is currently residing in your Home

    fasthaggis
    Member

    Do it all bike ,with do it all tyres ,fitted with auto-tuning brakes and suspension.
    Optional auto-pilot

    fourbanger
    Member

    Auto sizing boobs for the girlfriend. Shrink em down when we’re hacking on the bikes and then serious sweater meat at the touch of a button for bedroom gymnastics. Why has this not been invented?!

    dingabell
    Member

    How many people are really going to ever use the “shrink boob” button?

    I think the idea is that you’d use the shrink button just before she heads off for a girls’ night out. A ‘face-twist’ button might also be useful.

    bwaarp
    Member

    Bionic noise cancellation chip that is surgically attached into your nervous system so that you can selectively mute obnoxious people.

    😳 Sorry 😳

    Premier Icon jamj1974
    Subscriber

    Northwind – Member
    Some sort of incompetent-project-manager repellant spray.

    I need some of that ^^!

    Premier Icon JoeG
    Subscriber

    Hoverboard!

    samuri
    Member

    Proper auto cars.

    In fact, my idea is better than that. The roads would essentially become a rail type link. You’d drive to the end of your street and then when you join the main carriageway, the master computer takes over your car, you’ve already told it where you’re going. Once you reach another car, you form a type of chain, nose to tail. Cars can be removed and added at the appropriate places but ultimately, you just sit there reading a book or more likely, watching some bilge on TV while the master computer gets you all to your place of work.

    From the day the system is activated there will be no road deaths. Cyberdyne systems 101 drive with a perfect record.

    On August 22nd, 2024, Cyberdyne system 101 becomes self aware and drives everyone into the sea.

    fasthaggis
    Member

    the master computer takes over

    footflaps
    Member

    Just leave the paint rollers in a bucket of soapy hot water over night. Two second rinse the next morning and they’re clean as new.

    Pigface
    Member

    Sweater meat 😯

    Premier Icon DavidB
    Subscriber

    On August 22nd, 2024, Cyberdyne system 101 becomes self aware and drives everyone the Audi and BMW drivers into the sea.

    willard
    Member

    Sensible ideas:
    Nuclear fusion
    anti-gravity

    Not-so-sensible ideas:
    Dwarf cows (maybe, say, labrador sized, so that each home could have one in their garden, keeping the grass short and providing about a pint of milk a day or so)
    Transport tubes like on Futurama.

    Dwarf cows (maybe, say, labrador sized, so that each home could have one in their garden, keeping the grass short and providing about a pint of milk a day or so)

    Great idea, it would eat the grass and provide milk,for your porridge for example. We could name it after some combination of ‘grass’ and ‘oats’.!

    RealMan
    Member

    Transport tubes EVERYTHING like on Futurama.

    bigyinn
    Member

    ‘grass’ and ‘oats’.!

    a groat?

    I frequently found I’d get to the bottom of a steep hill, hit a T-junction and be unable to lean forward to see round walls

    Side facing cameras in the front bumper?

    The roads would essentially become a rail type link…. gets you all to your place of work.

    How about clean efficient integrated public transport, more working from home, flexible hours and all the other things that would stop us being a nation of 1 to a car bumper to bumper commuters?

    How about some kind of electronic system to enable everybody to vote on the running of the country rendering political parties and MP’s obsolete

    chvck
    Member

    Even though I believe that they’re utterly impossible – teleporters. Nip to the alps for lunch.

    Premier Icon molgrips
    Subscriber

    A way of sending video and audio of yourself to meetings or a workplace so you don’t have to actually schlep across the country to attend.

    Wait, what? It already exists? Then why don’t people use it?! Imagine the hassle it’d save, and the CO2 emissions too!

    How about some kind of electronic system to enable everybody to vote on the running of the country rendering political parties and MP’s obsolete

    I posted this the other day. A very good idea, but a very dangerous one.

    chilled76
    Member

    A “don’t need a poo pill”.

    (Currently can’t leave my classroom for another 1 hr 45 mins and am about touching cloth)

    Would also be useful for when you get to the middle of nowhere and are about to start a ride and feel the call of nature.

    Premier Icon theotherjonv
    Subscriber

    Paint rollers – grrrrr!

    I hate that so much that I don’t clean them. Wrap them in cling film after use and they stay fresh, so if you have a big decorating job on you can keep going back to them and only clean once. Or frankly, if you’ve spent a week decorating using one white roller the whole time, then just bin it. The cost is nothing compared to the cost of the paint and the pita factor of cleaning them.

    Premier Icon kiwijohn
    Subscriber

    Dear Science…
    [video]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOH15_pqWZ4[/video]

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