…why, but why do women need to throw the ‘well if you don’t know’ pebble into the pond!!!

Apparently I’ve been peeing-off the wife over the last few weeks, lord knows what I’ve done! It’s been a rubbish few weeks at work and I’ve not been captain chuckles but she knows all about this.

I’m getting the blanked treatment – so I’ve sent her an email* – I’ll probably get rollocked for that too!

the-muffin-man
(looking forward to a relaxing evening!)

(*we won’t be able to talk tonight as we have our 7yr old nieces staying).

Check mumsnet, there’s probably a thread about you

Have you missed a birthday, anniversary or important date?

Told her you’d do something and as yet haven’t done it?

Maybe the clue is in your name! Maybe you’re not “muffin” man!!

Maybe you upset her in one of her dreams. Been known to happen.

have you wee’d on the floor and then she stood in it going to the loo in the middle of the night. 😕

Is your patio looking a little tatty? Two birds/one stone.

rene59 – Member

Maybe you upset her in one of her dreams. Been known to happen.

LOL been there 🙄 I was in the bad books for two days after, despite a rational conversation knowing it was a dream…..

Has she noticed how many bikes you actually have in the garage (against what you have told her you own)??

thankfully i never ever get this

She makes here feelings clear

Maybe you upset her in one of her dreams. Been known to happen.

I had a day of tears and silent treatment for this, no joke.

Have you mentioned that Ellie Golding can break nuts with her thighs? IF not don’t, doesn’t go down well.

have you been throwing your pebbles in someone else’s pond?

She should be well happy with a bloke called the Muffin Man.

Has she at any point used the phrase ‘no… its fine’ or ‘no…. I’m fine’?

If she has then you are well and truley ****ed my friend. The word ‘fine’ in this context is one that should chill you to the very core. No word in the English language, when delivered with those 2 other preceding words, holds such doom-laden, ominous implications

Go and ask her if she’s ok? Just so you know. If those words are uttered then run! Don’t look back! RUN!!!!!

Give her a list of things to do: Washing/Ironing/Cleaning/Scrubbing the floor down/Clearing spiders webs/Clearing leaves from the garden etc..
If she does all that then shes worth opening up a conversation with. 😉

Tell her to grow up and stop acting like a 5 year old.

Yeah, that’ll do it

Refuse to partake in such immaturity. She’ll come round eventually

njee20 – Member
Is your patio looking a little tatty? Two birds/one stone.

Genuine lol !

Op, tis just the way of life. My wife argued that I didn’t do what she asked this morning, whilst I was running around getting ready for work after I’d put he bins out , cut my finger and got the kids breakfast. When I said “but you haven asked me anything” her answer was to get in huff and walk away stating “you should just know”.

I’m not stressing about it, she’ll be fine when I walk in the door later, just before I go for a ride on my bike…

Either failure to use the beaker, or using the wrong beaker.

bikebouy has got it sussed, keep my wife busy with menial tasks, never have any problems. 🙂

Either failure to use the beaker, or using the wrong beaker.

Surely a man of your means and stature should use a chalice

Surely a man of your means and stature should use a chalice

Have you learned nothing from the penultimate scene of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade?

🙁

Jamie, with my stature, a small beaker’s just fine, thanks.

Oh, I see what you mean now…. 😳

Have you learned nothing from the penultimate scene of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade?

dont take the chalice outside and do it there ? 😉

dont take the chalice outside and do it there ?

xactly.

no matter what you have or havent done, there’s only one solution.

aopologise

the trouble with apologising is that you’re always asked ‘What for?’ and then it gets a bit tricky…

Hmmm – had a reply, in summary apparently I am…

“…you are distant, uninterested, grumpy, always tired, bored, exasperated with me especially.”

Guilty of some, but the same can be said about the wife too.

I can be a a bit of picky sod also – a little example – last week we were sat watching the telly in the evening and she starts moaning that there has been nothing shown of Torvill and Dean’s re-dancing of Bolero – I rather sarcastically pointed out that since she got up and went to work she hadn’t watched a single minute of telly so how could she moan that nothing had been shown!

This sort of thing winds her up, but I can’t help myself – and after 24 years of marriage I sort of feel why shouldn’t I say what I think.

…you are distant, uninterested, grumpy, always tired, bored

Thats hardly fair. She’s just described the entire male species – in remarkable restrained terms actually – well apart from the odd generally happy freak who should be treated with suspicion, or gay blokes, who for reasons best known to themselves tend to be more upbeat and engaging. might be something to do with listening to too much disco

Mrs Binners put this up in our house….

…. just so any visitors know the lay of the land from the off. Not that it’d ever really need pointing out, to be fair

after 24 years of marriage I sort of feel why shouldn’t I say what I think.

after 24 years I’d have thought you’d have worked out exactly why you shouldn’t say what you think…

“…you are distant, uninterested, grumpy, always tired, bored, exasperated with me especially.”

Guilty of some, but the same can be said about the wife too.

… earlier:

It’s been a rubbish few weeks at work and I’ve not been captain chuckles but she knows all about this.

One thing is knowing about it, another thing is actually being happy with it. Apologies time, book a table at a restaurant, flowers…

you are distant, uninterested, grumpy, always tired, bored, exasperated with me especially

look her straight in the eyes and lovingly ask if it is that time of the month

Do something really, really bad, that way she will not be cross about the last incident and you will know why she is cross with you.

Apologies time, book a table at a restaurant, flowers…

…I’ll suggest she does that when I get home.

Sometime she isn’t the only one who needs support.

you need a bra?

So you do “know” really.

this thread is beginning to sound a little like an episode of Friends. so whilst it makes my teeth itch, I also have a stirring in my loins.

As I now aim to do “..it wrong”,everytime,this is now my daily mantra.So when I get that right (eg.wrong!),I regard that day a total success!!

no matter what you have or havent done, there’s only one solution.

aopologise

Are you some sort of maniac?

Never, ever apologize until you have a clear understanding of what you are apologizing for, She’ll call your bluff straight away and add “not knowing the unknowable” to the list of your shortcomings…

I got an amazing admission out of my Missus the other day, that that we only seem to argue when the painters are imminent… I asked for that statement in writing, but I’m still waiting…

I also apparently do terrible things in her dreams, they must be truly awful as I’m quite a git in real life too…

lately I’ve tried to adopt the mindset of a Lion tamer, Yes you are engaged in a “dangerous dance” but there is a strange thrill that comes from taunting a deadly creature with the ability to eviscerate you… The line between bravery and stupidity is a fine one…