Not laughing at this at all. No, not one bit.

Rachel

I am very jealous, after a cold ride I could easily be mistaken for a slightly chubby female

Why stop with merino pants/willy warmer. Use the whole Merino 🙂

(oops, did the welshfarmer give a bit too much info there!)

With the right saddle could you manage a “tuck under”?

Oddly, I have a pair of windproof boxers for just this reason 🙂

I reckon I’m onto a product here.
A DIY motorbike heated grip pad inserted under the seat cover around the nose of the saddle, powered from light battery packs.

Ebay linky

Help me out with a product name.

Todger toaster?

Put a powerful led light on your helmet, they kick out some heat on full power. Might set your pants on fire though!

Knob hob!

^ Helmet Heater?

Cock Cooker?

Hob knob! Brilliant!

Woody burner?

Teamslug: I like it mate.
If we’re going to exploit the massive market in the Far East I think we’ll need to re-brand though.

Cock Wok.

2amps and testicles don’t make a good mix

Stevelol – Member
Lol

You would say that.

less ventilated helmet?

That made me wince. I’m guessing that a ventilated version is for unorthodox Jews or those wanting the best of both worlds…

Edit : Actually, that would be more akin to a helmet cover, wouldn’t it.

Fail!

And there’s me thinking this was going to be about the latest Bond villain :-/

End of ride fluffer.

[video]https://youtu.be/P60CFNwvWlU[/video]

And there’s me thinking this was going to be about the latest Bond villain :-/

I thought Coldplay had re-named themselves. Correctly.

Edmund had the right idea.

Was cold one this morning. Still not back to normal yet.

This thread is so much better without pics….

I started wearing baggies over my bibtights after colleagues would try and guess the outside air temperature as I strode through the office post commute…..

Esme – what’s the story behind that picture of an Iron on a seatpost?

Great thread. But on a more serious note, some saddles or bad set up will mean you are cutting off blood flow to your chap and this could be a sign of that?

Can lead to “performance issues” further down the line too.

encase them all in a dog poo bag, to act as a self contained humidity controlled polytunnel.

Also helpful if you have to run any distance to prevent chafing.

In the spirit of naming these inventions, I’m calling it the wien-house.

Cheap buff from TK Maxx folded in half (or quarters, you judge) and stick it in front of goods, essential on a winter road ride.

Get someone to knit a small woolly hat for the end of your member.

You could call it a weenie beanie 😆

Yeah I used to get this, shorts/tights that were otherwise fine for the rest of me left the old chap a bit unprotected from windchill. I started a thread about it and fleecey boxers were mentioned. I started wearing baggies over the top when needed. Tbh I wear “over shorts” most of the time, pair of footy shorts is enough to stop windchill on a mild day and “protect your dignity”, got some black n white DH shorts which are warm, shrug off rain well and are quite eye catching (from a safety point of view) combined with knee warmers for cooler weather. Only go for the full Lycra look if I’m on a proper road ride

Great thread. But on a more serious note, some saddles or bad set up will mean you are cutting off blood flow to your chap and this could be a sign of that?

Never thought of that. Saddle mayhave slipped. Saddle is good though must have 25-30,000 miles on it.

I like the idea of the cigarette lighter.

Johnson Ronson

If your member is frozen and you decide to “bash the bishop” does it feel like someone else’s bishop!