A quick scan through reveals TJ’s as being good advice…
If you are being made redundant and in danger off losing the house get some good money advice – in 99% of cases house repossession can be avoided if you take the right steps.
You sound possibly depressed to me – go get pro help. GP first port of call, counselling can really help as well
When you are redundant get out on your bike! Exercise is the best thing for what ails you
You either stop seeing her now, except for children matters, or you BOTH commit to some relationship councelling. If not then move on mate. Treat yourself to a healing period. Just you. Dont fret on finding a replacement. Do your thing for a while. Get your head straight. Get used to being you, & being happy with your lot. As for moving on, you need to be free of all this stuff first. No women is going to want some sob story. You dont sound thick, you’ve obviously got a lot to offer someone. But stalking her isnt going to get you there. Take advice & you’ll be in a far better place soon enough. Drag your ass up Cannock of you fancy a day out riding somewhere different.