Best man's speech

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  • Best man's speech
  • Premier Icon santacoops
    Subscriber

    Sort out a laptop and projector with screen, get some photos off the bride and groom’s family of them or get the bride/friends to give you some funny ones, use the embarrassing ones, talk about stories around some of the photos, even make up a story completely about one photo that ends up being quite long… then tell everyone the story was a lie, base your speech around that sort of thing. Focus is off your face and on the screen. Worked fantastic for me… although i also had 4 pints beforehand!!!

    Premier Icon tinman66
    Subscriber

    Ye don’t under any circumstances do a google search for best man’s speech and just use loads of ‘jokes’ you find on the internet. If you want to know why, go on YouTube and there are loads of speeches all using the same jokes.

    Try and be original, don’t tell jokes only three people in the room will get, tell funny stories about the groom, don’t insult the bride. My brother was my best man and did an awesome speech, he had a loads of photos on a projector and just took the mickey out of me a bit.

    Also keep it to 7 or 8 mins max, too many go way over the top with timing.

    Premier Icon njee20
    Subscriber

    Don’t get drunk before hand.

    russ295
    Member

    I was best man for my now brother in law.
    I’m pretty quiet and not great at that sort of stuff. I wrote a poem, sounds sad but it went down a treat.
    On the other hand he is great at stuff like that and completely tanked it at my wedding, told lots of jokes that weren’t really funny and went on for ages.

    warton
    Member

    Don’t get drunk before hand.

    But don’t have any Cocaine

    Premier Icon njee20
    Subscriber

    FWIW when I did it I thought about a few of the qualities I admired in the groom, then came up with a short and potentially embarassing anecdote for each of those. Then backed it all up at the end with some genuine compliments! Went down well.

    Trying to be funny is really difficult, I’d say avoid it, it’s usually just really awkward. Just be natural, you’ll have the attention of the room, relax, and try to avoid reading it word for word. Better to stumble on a few words or pause for a few seconds than bury your eyes on a page and sound dull and monotone.

    Not that I’m an expert by any stretch!

    warton
    Member

    Sort out a laptop and projector with screen, get some photos off the bride and groom’s family of them or get the bride/friends to give you some funny ones, use the embarrassing ones, talk about stories around some of the photos, even make up a story completely about one photo that ends up being quite long… then tell everyone the story was a lie, base your speech around that sort of thing. Focus is off your face and on the screen. Worked fantastic for me… although i also had 4 pints beforehand!!!

    Way to long, 5 mins max. People really don’t go to the wedding to hear the speeches. the quicker they’re over the quicker people can go to the toilet, and start having a good time.

    tops 5
    Member

    Following on from the Groom speech thread, I have to do a BM speech in a couple of months and I am bricking it any help/tips in a similar vein to the other thread would be most welcome

    Premier Icon njee20
    Subscriber

    I’m inclined to agree, I aimed for 5 minutes, think it was marginally over, but personally I wouldn’t set up slides and make it long, folk lose interest.

    Still, it worked for you, and the web is full of stories of people doing things that really made me cringe when I was looking for inspiration that have apparently gone down well.

    At the end of the day you know the groom and hopefully the bride and their friends and family, do what you think they’d like!

    Premier Icon santacoops
    Subscriber

    Sort out a laptop and projector with screen, get some photos off the bride and groom’s family of them or get the bride/friends to give you some funny ones, use the embarrassing ones, talk about stories around some of the photos, even make up a story completely about one photo that ends up being quite long… then tell everyone the story was a lie, base your speech around that sort of thing. Focus is off your face and on the screen. Worked fantastic for me… although i also had 4 pints beforehand!!!

    Way to long, 5 mins max. People really don’t go to the wedding to hear the speeches. the quicker they’re over the quicker people can go to the toilet, and start having a good time.

    Mine took about 5 mins, i didn’t go through the family album!

    warton
    Member

    santacoops, i stand corrected 🙂

    Premier Icon Northwind
    Subscriber

    Maybe get a little bit drunk.

    I kept mine pretty simple- used internet examples to give me a structure and some ideas but changed all the funny, found it very useful. There’s some rules- you’re supposed to toast the bridesmaids etc- but otherwise you can pretty much go where you like. Mine was all misdirection- lots of leading up to obvious punchlines then derailing it. Some intentionally bad jokes, got to have a bad one. But tbh what works for one won’t work for another. Oh and wind it up with a nice sentimental bit, bridesmaids like that.

    I did steal this one- “I hope I do a good job- Graham says if I’m really good, I can be best man at his next wedding too”

    marsdenman
    Member

    As a veteran of a lot of wedding speeches (I’m a wedding photographer…) i’d echo:

    Not too long.
    Not off the internet – I appreciate folk get nervous and look for ‘easy’ options but, IMO, if you’re best man, you should know the groom well and have more than enough of your own material – keep it real.
    To get ideas flowing, imagine you’re down the pub, chatting about the groom with your mates. What stories would come out? Cull the stuff you really cannot use and take it from there…
    Slideshows can work but, IMO, a bit of a risk – if the tech stuff goes down (i’ve seen it happen) what’s you backup plan?

    Hope it goes well!

    lehutch
    Member

    I was best man for my bro last year and it went really well, my top tips

    Keep it short, I think mine was around 700 words maybe 8 mins or so
    Don’t get drunk
    Don’t ad lib
    Use the Internet to fe an idea of structure, throw in a few standard jokes if required
    Enjoy it….the crowd will generally on your side, it’s not as if they are paying to be entertained

    Premier Icon Garry_Lager
    Subscriber

    Keeping it real (and short) is the best advice. The humour will come from that but you need a bit from the heart. Getting up and trying to ‘be funny’ by reeling off prepared gags is usually excruciating for all concerned.

    I’ve got one coming up that I’m a bit worried about – I’m OK with something like this in terms of putting in a solid performance, but can’t really offer much more than that. The guy is a bit of a legend, though. There’s a mile and a half of quality material and it really demands something stellar.

    pymwymis
    Member

    1. Do NOT use any “you had to be there” stories – they weren’t and they won’t get it
    2. Be current. Your target is there in the room – they know his issues – let him have it with both barrels – NICELY he is supposed to be your mate. Being generic with your humour will get more people on-side.
    3. Do NOT assassinate the groom – no one will thank you for it and you will look like a ****. Be funny not nasty.
    4. Do be nice about your mate. Everyone will love you especially all the single girls – “he’s so sensitive” etc etc
    5. Don’t invent too much. Stuff you know off heart will be remembered- all you need to work on then is the structure /order of things.
    6. Enjoy it and smile. Most people in the room want you to do well.
    7. Don’t respond to heckles – it will only put you off your stride.

    There. I have spoken my brains Grasshopper.

    Pym

    pymwymis
    Member

    1. Do NOT use any “you had to be there” stories – they weren’t and they won’t get it
    2. Be current. Your target is there in the room – they know his issues – let him have it with both barrels – NICELY he is supposed to be your mate. Being generic with your humour will get more people on-side.
    3. Do NOT assassinate the groom – no one will thank you for it and you will look like a ****. Be funny not nasty.
    4. Do be nice about your mate. Everyone will love you especially all the single girls – “he’s so sensitive” etc etc
    5. Don’t invent too much. Stuff you know off heart will be remembered- all you need to work on then is the structure /order of things.
    6. Enjoy it and smile. Most people in the room want you to do well.
    7. Don’t respond to heckles – it will only put you off your stride.

    There. I have spoken my brains Grasshopper.

    Pym

    eskay
    Member

    I wrote a poem, it went down really well and meant I did not have to crack any corny jokes.

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