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This is inspired by the Oban thread. I am lucky enough to be living just about where I would ideally want to. My house is warm comfortable etc I have a job. I read peoples reasons for living where they most want to on the Oban thread. They talk about weather, house prices, employment, transport, access to facilities etc.
So after a bit of thought I realised that my reason for living here is people. Many of my "nearest and dearest "are actually very near . There's a sense of belonging to this area though I was born and brought up 130 miles away.
I do not think there is any notion of right or wrong here. It is very much what works for each family/person.
Access to a huge range of outdoor activities but with the convenience of a small town.
My house looks into the Northern Corries of the Cairngorms so it always feels "rural" even though I live in a small estate.
Edit: further to your point, after my parents died there was really nothing tying me to the city I'd lived in (or near) for 50 years.
I went as far south as I could afford to when everything I owned fitted in my van. Got my first ever grown-up job, bought a house just before Covid hit and we're stuck here for the foreseeable. Making choices and having options isn't something you get to do much at our level.
A compromise of being near enough to my work, near enough to my wifes work, close to good schools, easy access to the countryside for dog walks and OK MTB rides, close enough to the motorway to get me to good MTBing and semi-reasonable house prices.
Lived in a fair few places in my life, reality is it's always a case of what you want, or what you need, current location north of Bristol is fine for everything, so nice schools a short walk away, all the clubs required (swimming, gymnastics, dance, etc), 12 miles to my work, 1 mile to the wife's work, all the amenities required. We had a choice though, could've moved to FoD, but for the forest on your doorstep, it would have meant giving up on a lot of the above, so it was a no-go in the end.
Living in the middle of Derbyshire I'd like to be a lot closer to the coast. Won't happen while my parents are still alive and I need to work though!
Can't complain about where I live now though - nice village and surrounded by open countryside.
Grew up in Karesborough, moved to Harrogate (4 miles away) when I left home as I like it here, my family is/was here and my kids are in a very good school doing their GCSEs.
I can see us moving to a village outside of the town or somewhere on the east coast when our girls go to Uni (or whatever they decide to do) in a few years.
We don't know where we want to live.
We knew we didn't want to continue living in the middle of town, in our case Munich. So much so we sold everything and moved into a van and are currently travelling around Europe looking for somewhere we could envisage us living.
We know we don't want to live in a flat, surrounded by neighbours on all sides. We don't need nor want a large house but would like a large garden.
We (I) want access to riding from the doorstep without having to load up the car or van.
We don't want to have to rely on a car, so good cycling infrastructure and access to a train station is important. We've a eBullit cargo bike that covers most things a car does and combined with the Bob trailer can carry more than a weeks worth of shopping.
We don't want to live somewhere with long, wet winters.
GF works from wherever there's a good internet connection.
I need space for a workshop and would likely travel once or twice a year for bigger projects and live wherever that may be.
We were seriously considering buying a place near to Finale Ligure, but after being there for a few months realised that even the most ardent cyclists were heavily reliant on their car for day to day things. The geography doesn't help with roads either going up or down. Roads are too narrow in most places to feel comfortable travelling by bike. Also didn't like the feeling of being wedged in between mountains or hillsides.
Search continues.
We relocated from West Yorkshire to Shropshire Welsh boarders just before lock down for work reason. Could have chosen to live anywhere within a patch of about 50 square miles.
Chose where we did as quiet hamlet with a pub, nice walks, hills etc. Not too far from civilisation, on the edge of some stunning countryside that no one ever visits. Also I cant live in flat areas, dont like it.
Been here nearly 5 year, still pinch myself how lucky we are. However - mtb is not as good as West Yorkshire. Could ride for miles from my doorstep with going on roads, some really good trail riding. There just isnt that type of riding around here as its all farms or small areas of forestry
What is amazing though is the road bike riding. Can go out for hours any maybe only see 5 cars.
Big enough to have good shops, restaurants, culture
Small enough to get out into the countryside (cannot be flat and must support some MTB)
I've contributed a lot to the Oban thread.
I was a nomad for most of my life as my parents moved about as a kid and then I did too as an adult. I'm now back in the Highlands/Moray border 46 years after leaving as a child so whilst I have few memories of living here as a kid, it's the first time in my life I've felt like I'm 'home' and also the first time in my life I felt I could answer the "where are you from?" question with any legitimacy.
My parents retired back up to here 18 years ago and although my father died a while back my mum's still here. So for me, it's been easy. Mr C is from the south coast on England and her folks still live there. Whilst she is (arguably even more than me) settled into life here and super happy it was an absolute deal breaker that relatively easy travel back there for visits and in an emergency was vital.
To that end the Nairn area is a bit of a head and a bit of a heart choice. To be honest, I'd like to be more remote (Gairloch has always appealed) but it would not work for Mrs C so that's a good sensible compromise.
Moved where we are now due to house prices and work.
Kids settled into schools etc, local town is ok and ok MTB and Road riding from my doorstep. Good Peak District riding is a 30 minute drive away.
However noticed that people seem to be getting more and more ignorant and selfish, just silly things like litter and dog shit not being picked up, selfish parking. All low level stuff but it does grate.
Once kids have finished school in the next 4 years I think we'll look at moving somewhere closer to the countryside.
Toyed with Scotland, Northumberland and Shropshire. So we'll see what happens in the next few years. But for me needs good cycling, walking ideally a local pub or two and no more than 30 minutes drive to big town and associated rail links etc.
I WFH so that's given us loads of flexibility.
I like the people here (edge of Yorkshire Dales), which is odd, as I'm quite antisocial really and my wife would say she is too. But somehow we have built up a good number of local interactions, there's plenty of outdoors (though the weather is awful), all the essential amenities within walking distance (other than hospital which will probably be awkward at some point) and not too far from larger towns when we want. At some point I'll want a smaller easier house and the housing stock here is rubbish (poky/ancient or poky/modern) but there's no rush for that and sooner or later our needs will coincide with what's available!
It's my wife's part of the world but after visiting her parents locally over the past 30 years it also feels very much like home to me. I certainly don't want to go back to my childhood home.
Moved here for a combination of being able to ride from our door (mtb/gravel/road), it being "not London", but not too hard to get there and having an assortment of mates in the area.
The precise location was mostly a bit of happy accident, but it works well. 5 minute ride from the woods; 10 minute ride to the station. 2 big supermarkets 5 minutes walk away. Multiple local bakeries; friendly local garage, post office (although the bank has closed).
A decade in and we feel very much part of the community in a way we never did in London - there after 6 years we barely knew what our nextdoor neighbours looked like. Here, we're on decent terms. There's a strong riding community I feel part of and beyond that most people have some outdoor thing they do - walking, running, climbing, bikes of some variety - that gives us something in common.
I live where I do because it is more or less in the goldilocks zone for travel to Stockholm. It is close enough that we can get the train to town, or drive, and still get back home at a time that does not mean we need to think about a hotel from the get-go. That's also handy for when I need to go into the office, but does mean my GF has a 60-80 minute commute to her office.
The flip side is that it is not so trivially easy to get to places like supermarkets, normal shops or even a place that does a lunch when I feel i need a break from my desk. 20km from town means a trip in takes more than a lunchtime.
I can't see myself moving back to Stockholm. Uppsala? Maybe, but it is still too cramped compared to the house. Further north? Nah, too far from services.
We moved up near Ilkeston 23 years ago simply because we couldn’t afford to start a family on just one salary living down in Sussex.
Cost me my original career snd I'm only just back to my 1999 salary level, but the smaller mortgage meant we were able to give the kids what we thought was the right support and environment, plus we are less than an hour from the Peak District, Nottingham and Derby are each 30 minutes away, walking and riding from the door.
In 5 years time we hope to be looking at retiring and downsizing. Would be nice to be nearer the coast, that's all we've missed.
Because Edinburgh is really bloody nice, I have friends here, it's not full of rightwing headbangers, there's loads to do and I can still ride my mountain bike properly from the door.
I can't imagine living anywhere where the primary reason was "because it's so easy to get to these other places". If you want to spend so much time getting out of it, it's not a good place to live.
Access to a huge range of outdoor activities but with the convenience of a small town.
Yup, and:
Affordable housing
High saleries in relation to cost of living or good business opportunites
Lots of clubs and social activities
Good schools
Good transport links
Good weather, for me that means warm most of the year, snow up the hill and a bit too hot for a month or so. Enough rain to make things green.
Good affordable health care
Good people
When we were on holiday in the Dordogne last year, staying at a pals gites, we spoke to a couple of couples from Fife (next table in a restaurant). One couple had a holiday place there, the other were looking.
When the ones looking described what they were after it sounded just like our house here in the Scottish Borders, but without the hot weather. When I described where we lived the husband commented that a place like that would be perfect for them, but just too expensive compared to France.
Prices have risen heavily in the +10 years we've been here.
Teesside.
Cheap houses
North York Moors on the doorstep
Fantastic beaches
My parents live in the Dales an hour away.
Engineering work locally
"WFH" commutable to Sheffield, Newcastle etc for the odd day or meeting. You could even be in London by train for a 10am meeting without too much stress.
It's one of those places where the local cycling is 'good' (it's hardly the Lakes) but being the geographical center of the country and on the ECML pretty much everywhere is doable for a weekend trip with not much planning.
Why do you want to live where you want to live?
In no particular order: my hometown so everything is familiar, proximity to family, proximity to my friends, 30 minute walk into town (York) which is great, every type of shop etc you need within the ring road so no need to be driving for ages to get something you need for the bike/DIY/car etc, loads of really good MTB options within 30/40 minute drive (that bothers me a bit having had riding on my doorstep, literally, in Calderdale for 19 years but hey ho...), brilliant schools for the kids, nice quiet neighbourhood, York is big enough to have everything you need but small enough to bump into people you know almost every time you step out the door etc
I'm a social care worker very fortunate to own a house. Rent was approximately 50% of my monthly wage, and that was pre pandemic ,cost of living crisis etc. Don't often go to the pub as the price of a pint/dram is too high. I was in a cafe on Saturday where they wanted £8 for a takeaway sandwich. I went hungry. These days most socialising is done in peoples homes- the proper meaning of a ceilidh.
@MoreCashThanDash I know how you feel my 1996 wage + free accomodation , heat and light,would be roughly the same as my current wage.
I live in Dunblane. We moved here for access to green and solitude from my back door. Good transport links to Edinburgh and Glasgow for my other half's work and holiday flights. Comparatively cheap house prices. Still have all the usual amenities of a decent size town. Great gateway to Scotland Holidays too.
If we didn't have to work in cities, we might have chosen somewhere more rural, but this about the best fit for us at the mo. I can't see us moving when we retire though, mainly due to the circle of friends we've built up.
I’m starting to put a real commitment to active travel infrastructure higher up my list of priorities. When I visit places where it is done right it is so beneficial to the feel of a place and the quality of life.
Originally as it let me move in with the mrs and us both have a doable commute, and (having lived in the middle of nowhere and in one horse towns where the horse died) it had enough ‘stuff’ to exist locally and is likely to continue to do so. and it’s nearby so we can walk to it which I considered essential (probably moreso if they ever “nick” our driving licences), also lots of useful features - cul de sac, lots of parking, double garage, other wins were that it’s in a fairly densely bridleway populated area with enjoyable countryside nearby.
After years here I know I take the local trails for granted but it’s so nice to be able to hit them in about 4mins from the house, we’ve both ‘integrated’ and it’s near enough to our original friends that we’ve kept that going, I never want to have the bollox of buying and selling again, it’s turned out to be the most unbodged house I’ve ever owned and I rather like being in it, just as I like wandering/cycling down to the local cafe, market, takeaway, pub etc and being able to walk or cycle to all the sports I do.
I’d love to live somewhere with mild, light winters. The short days are starting to really do a number on me. To the point where I really don’t look forward to Autumn and Winter now. In the meantime I’ll be stuck in Macclesfield. It has good transport links and some decent riding nearby. The kids are settled at school and have my mother and father-in-law nearby.
I think it all depends on what stage of life you’re at. I moved to a highland village from a city (Aberdeen). Mainly because I’d given up work in the oil industry and wanted to live somewhere I loved going on holiday to. It did mean I dragged my wife and kids out of their comfort zone.
There is a pub and a cafe in our village but no shop. It’s interesting watching the kids getting excited when we go to a nearby village with a Co-op. The positives for the kids are the local schools are much smaller and friendlier than their old city schools. The youngest now goes to a primary school with a total of 47 pupils and it’s much safer I can let them go wandering on their own without worrying.
Anyway my main reason is access to countryside and mountains from my front door. I have a view over to Sgorr Gaoith from the upstairs windows. Our big city fixes are a weekend visit to Edinburgh or Glasgow once a month or so. That seems to keep everyone happy. Only real downside is it gets extremely cold at times in January/February.
I live where I want to live, they'll be taking me out in a box.
What I can say is that it took living in many places to get to where I live, which is nearly, but not quite perfect.
I had to move from Ireland to Glasgow first, then go through a failed move to Beauly (couldn't compete in the local job market without gaining further qualifications), then Appin (too close to Oban), then Fort William (too close to Fort William, but it's a better base than Oban), then a rural location north of Fort William but south of Fort Augustus where we're sticking.
I don't need to explain why I live here, I don't think that high a percentage of folk who are into the outdoors end up living rurally in Lochaber.
I can cope with the weather and the winter nights. What bugs me is the moment the good weather comes the roads are rammed with tourists who leave their brains and courtesy at home, and the locals behind the wheel often turn into frustrated lunatics; I used to love my road cycling, but now it is neglected.
@waderider I live in Fort William which I have to agree is too close to Fort William, however it's a big saving in petrol I'm not using, or time if I was biking to work.I'm getting older too, being nearer to services may well be an advantage for me fairly soon.
Also if anyone from the Scottish government is reading this we really do NEED our new hospital
Moved to Tobermory in June 2021 for the lifestyle - love the outdoors, like being next to the sea and the relative peacefulness of being on an island. My cycling has reduced considerably, but replaced with sea kayaking and getting into the hills. There’s a real sense of community here, particularly once a few folks realise you’ve ‘survived’ a few wet winters. I work part-time in the oldest, best known shop which is a great way to get to know people, good craic selling whisky to tourists. Yes, the weather can be rubbish at times but at other times, it can a glorious place to live.
OK, it does get busy in summer with tourists, but hasn’t been spoilt as much by tourism like Skye or bits of the mainland IMO.
Enjoy seeing pics of your 'pets' and guessing your garden was always their territory? Presumably there's a manageable number of deer on the island or are they culled? Don't know whether you've seen the news item about the Test Valley village of Broughton where a large assortment of dead/maimed animals were dumped. Thought to be the work of poachers.
Grew up in Salford in the 80's and 90's and couldn't wait to escape. Moved to London and now out in rural Surrey. It's quiet and the people are great. It was a trade off for a relatively rural life and easy access to London, motorways and airports.
Would love to set up home in Switzerland at some point, but not too sure how with ageing parents how that would work just yet?!?
Presumably there’s a manageable number of deer on the island or are they culled?
There’s actually a few too many deer and torn between it’s nice to nature on my doorstep, or the frustrations of Mrs DB when they’ve scoffed her tulips again or shredded her prized shrubs. There’s one that will charge me if I’ve got the dogs. They do cull the deer in some areas, but our wee herd has grown from 12 to 20 in 3 years.
Great riding from the door.
Train stations in walking distance that link to many cities.
Housing cheap enough that I can live there.
I went as far south as I could afford to when everything I owned fitted in my van. Got my first ever grown-up job, bought a house just before Covid hit and we’re stuck here for the foreseeable. Making choices and having options isn’t something you get to do much at our level.
Interesting choice of words. I don't really see anyone as "stuck" somewhere they don't want to be or not have the option to leave. There's lots of points to balance up and all of us will have different "weights" we apply to each of those levers (which I think was the OP's point). Even if you are "stuck somewhere" because the wife wants to be there - that means that you apply a high degree of weight to your wife's happiness. If its because of a job - it might be a sign that its a job you really value or enjoy. In my case you might say I'm "stuck" here whilst the children are at school because we don't want to upset their friendships and education (but plenty of parents do that successfully), by the time they finish, their grandparents might be a bit more old and doddery so we might find that limits our "range" (but plenty of others would not place as much weight on that). By the time that's no longer a concern, we ourselves might be starting to think about where there's bungalows and good hospitals etc. Many of these decisions "just happen" but none of them are imposed on us, and we can all say, "hang on, is this really what you/I want". As retirement starts to become a reasonable possibility on the far off horizon we are starting to have more of those conversations.
I can’t imagine living anywhere where the primary reason was “because it’s so easy to get to these other places”. If you want to spend so much time getting out of it, it’s not a good place to live.
Whilst I sit on your side of the fence I had a friend who was very much on the otherside, and I could see his point. He lived in one of the ex-mining villages near Alloa - worked near Edinburgh. His partner worked somewhere in Fife. They had elected to live in Allloa in the early 90's - its wasn't aspirational, it wasn't a great place to be every day, but that didn't matter to them - Mon-Fri they worked all day - then every weekend (and I do mean literally every weekend) they were off to ski touring, rock climbing, kayaking, etc. Alloa was just an affordable confluence of the roads that gave them options to go to easily where they wanted for the weekends. A cheap house was a conscious decision so they had more money to spend doing the stuff they loved at the weekends. They were both very smart people, they could have got higher paid, higher stress jobs - they had made a conscious decision to be able to switch off at 1700 on Friday so they could go and do what they loved. Its all a set of compromises.
National park with riding from the door, train services which open up even more route choices, 1.5 hours from the South Lakes, 1.5ish from the Peak. Three large cities within relatively easy reach. Good schools, houses not too pricey, down-to-earth vibe, decent pubs and restaurants in town. Only thing lacking is beaches.
I don’t really see anyone as “stuck” somewhere they don’t want to be or not have the option to leave.
People can absolutely be in the position where a move is completely unviable. There are even people who can't afford to move or afford to stay living where they are. Options aren't available to everyone.
There’s lots of points to balance up and all of us will have different “weights” we apply to each of those levers
Yes that's a pretty fair description of my point.
However I do also believe there are many people who don't have any choice over where they live.
For some people it's a battle to survive each day.
There’s actually a few too many deer and torn between it’s nice to nature on my doorstep, or the frustrations of Mrs DB when they’ve scoffed her tulips again or shredded her prized shrubs. There’s one that will charge me if I’ve got the dogs. They do cull the deer in some areas, but our wee herd has grown from 12 to 20 in 3 years.
That's quite a downside having your garden vandalised! Gosh, that's quite an increase in numbers and is there generally enough for them to eat, your plants excepted?
I'd rather see deer than tulips, or yet more dogs (even though I love 'em), around me.
Also... venison is tasty...
still pinch myself how lucky we are.
me too, and I've been here in Surrey about 30 years.
I was brought up around here but have lived in London, Scotland and Australia before I moved back to the area because of work. No particular thought went into where we got a house, but in retrospect looking on what we have here, 2 minutes walk into the countryside, 5 minutes walk into a village centre, an hour into central London, handy for the tunnel and ferries to France, living on the edge of mountain bike (and road bike) heaven plus lots of friendly people - I could not have picked a better place to live if I had tried.
Interesting choice of words. I don’t really see anyone as “stuck” somewhere they don’t want to be or not have the option to leave.
It's quite easy to be "stuck".
My mortgage has redemption penalty roughly a years net pay!
Assuming I kept the same mortgage, the monthly payment would almost double. It's 'affordable', but in a beans on toast every meal sort of way.
There's no one with a gun to my head saying I can't move, but it would be an act of financial suicide.
Plus the other stuff.
Some of it is conscious choices, some of it is circumstances, some of it is plain old luck.
I'm now living in a place I never thought I would be. In fact I actively argued against when my wife suggested it years ago. But circumstances changed and I realised it had a lot going for it.