I had a go at a pensioner (a big, ugly, tough, farmer type though....ahem) last year who ran my wife and I right off the road when we were on our tandem. I was pissed off enough at being run off the road but his added comments of; we should ride elsewhere as the road was too narrow for bikes [i]and[/i] cars, I looked a ****t in lycra (truth hurts) and some horrible unnecessary personal shit about my wife made me see red.
Luckily, I just knocked his glasses off with a mainly air girly punch before Mrs Boblo brought order to the situation.
I'm no fighter.
Do you have the time? <lamp!>
Last time (maybe 12 years ago) i hit someone was a bit like this.
Standing out of the rain one evening waiting for a taxi, some guy shelters beside me and asks 'do you have a light?' As i look down to my pocket i kinda see something heading towards me. Turns out it was his fist. Knocked my glasses off and broke my nose, sending blood everywhere. Cool i thought as it was the first time my nose had ever bled, then i lost it a little. After a kick to the ding-dings had no apparent affect i clubbed him to the ground. All he could mumble was 'good dig mate'. This made me even more upset so i did what anyone would do and picked him up by one arm and one leg and skimmed him down the road (known around these parts as a burlie 😀 )
Never punched never been punched. In a fight club way I'd like to have a fight but really, don't think it would e fun.
Euro - MemberDo you have the time? <lamp!>
Last time (maybe 12 years ago) i hit someone was a bit like this.
Standing out of the rain one evening waiting for a taxi, some guy shelters beside me and asks 'do you have a light?' As i look down to my pocket i kinda see something heading towards me. Turns out it was his fist. Knocked my glasses off and broke my nose, sending blood everywhere. Cool i thought as it was the first time my nose had ever bled, then i lost it a little. After a kick to the ding-dings had no apparent affect i clubbed him to the ground. All he could mumble was 'good dig mate'. This made me even more upset so i did what anyone would do and picked him up by one arm and one leg and skimmed him down the road (known around these parts as a burlie )
Hey, that reminds of a night I picked a fight with some lanky prick!! He ended up giving me a burlie?? (what the **** is a burlie?)
Been years, I'm not a fighter. Last proper knock-down fight I was in, I technically won but since I broke my own hand on his face I think probably I came off worse 😳 Perfect metaphor for streetfighting in general
[i]Last proper knock-down fight I was in, I technically won but since I broke my own hand on his face I think probably I came off worse[/i]
I had that problem as a teenager, twice.
Punched another kid at school hard enough to knock them over but ended up with my hand in plaster.
Positively Pyrrhic.
Where's surroundedtrolling****yman, I'd have thought this thread would have been right up his street.
Anyway, nearly two years ago.
It is many years since I've punched anyone. Since hurting my hand I've switched to using elbows instead.
About 5 years ago. Often for a bit. Usually about 10 seconds before I got knocked on my arse.
Drink completely to blame.
I punch with my groin. Once knocked down a wall with it and punched a hole through steel plating. Awesome power.
Lifer - Member
I punched a bloke 'cause he spilt my bird.
(Had to make sure I spelled that write)
Funny, I read that in exactly the way you made sure you didn't write it. Seems like a perfectly justifiable reason for punching someone.
Christmas do 4 years ago. We all got in the mini bus to go home but 3 were missing - saw out the back window our 2 scrawniest lads and 1 of the girls getting a pasting from a group of guys. Ran out, straight for the main guy and floored him in one. Surprisingly, that was the end of it.
Then we ran back to the mini bus and went home. Just incase. My face might not be the best, but I'd rather it didn't get any worse.
Not for over 20 years. Stupid activity. I did it quite a lot as a youngster, packed it in about 19-20. Never solved anything, only made more anger. I was quite good at fighting too, it's not something to be proud of.
This wasn't the last time, and I didn't actually punch anyone, but it's my "why you don't fight randoms" story. Myself, a really good mate, his brother and his little sister were out together. Large and blunt lads from a bad estate, but good guys... Anyway, had a few drinks, little sister is waiting in the cashline queue and this little guy starts chatting her up. All fine but he's a wee bit insistent and she's obviously not into it, he doesn't take the hints so one of the brothers went over to have a quiet word, which was probably something like "Git tae **** or I'll snap your legs". Anyway, one of those "Hey hey mate we're just talking, no bother" "I can see what you're just doing" conversations ensue, there's a bit of pushing and that, the lad's mates appear, we go over for backup, it's all very tense and we're a bit outnumbered but frankly with those 2 onside. it's probably going our way even with me handicapping them... til the older one of them says quietly
"Hey, sorry lads, we're just all in high spirits because he just turned pro". Pro? Pro boxer- we'd almost got in a square go with Alex Arthur MBE, WBO super featherweight champ, and I think Paul Appleby, soon to be british featherweight champ 😆 Plus, like, 6 other amateur boxers, but they weren't going to be that relevant after we all got knocked out with about 4 punches 😀
In my early twenties I suffered badly with road rage and could not count how many times I vacated my vehicle to square up to much larger men Than myself. It only ever ended in fisticuffs once because I think they saw the genuine rage in my eyes as I shouted at them how bad there driving was, with no real violent intent on my part I was just very very angry.
The one time I did was when I was sat at lights with my window open and some bloke walked up and put one on my chin without warning. So I jumped out and noticed a piece of 4x2 hardwood protruding next to my seat as I had no bulkhead in my van and due to the sliding door was able to grab it out through the front.
Thing was it turned out to be over 3 meters long and i felt like a magician pulling a never ending row of knotted hankies from his top hat as I passed hand over hand to eventually free up my weapon of choice.
And I then had to hold it in the middle to hit him with it, which I did until he decided he had enough and left.
That night I suffered from badly bruised ribs due to the fact that everytime I swung it away from him to then hit him with it I was hitting myself with the other end.
I once while walking over to a pretty girl in a nightclub tripped down a step and poked her in the eye if that counts.
Last Friday a really angry parent tried to punch me.
He drove into the school at an excesive speed in his Mercedes v8 Coupe thing, span his wheels on the school roundabout before driving into a parking space.
I'm on a bit of a crusade just now to stop parents driving like morons at school, so went to speak to him, he tried to argue he had been driving normally, i repeated it was too fast for our school, he wound the window up angrily.
Walked back to school entrance, where I heard the car engine revving, he pulled out, wheelspan down the drive, lost it on the roundabout, had to back up, powerslide around the roundabout and back to his parking space....in front of kids and parents.
Two ways to handle it - leave it, lose face, speak to him again, he loses face - better for one parent to lose face than all of them see me with no backbone
Went towards the car, when this man mountain appeared swearing at me and swinging. My security team pretty much need zimmer frames to get anywhere. Fortunately my boarding staff are large, and they through themselves in front of him.
Lots of calm talk from me, inviting him in to sit and explain why he is so upset, he just kept trying to hit me. some point he did manage to get a punch through to my back.
Security, plus boarding, and two other teachers, managed to get the angry man back to his car, and wait for his very embarrassed daughter.
Won a lot of parental support that day. A lot of negative talk from the local staff who don't like the way I do things, and support from those that do.
If you are going to ruin your reputation in Thailand try and hit the head of the school. Even being a rich parent doesn't remove you from that.
My best mate the night the first Gulf war broke out - so about 1991ish I guess. Can't remember what it was about now, but a lot of beer was drunk first, and very little actual contact was made. I think we went back indoors for a smoke afterwards.
Boxed amateur on & off until the age of 30. So punching people 2-3 times a week up to then.
An actual all in type affair, that wasn' since late teens.
Been lots of shouty hand bags type things since
Hey, that reminds of a night I picked a fight with some lanky prick!! He ended up giving me a burlie?? (what the **** is a burlie?)
A burlie is something normally given to small children as it makes them dizzy and giggle with fear - a poor man's Alton Towers if you will. The child lies on the ground with their arms and legs apart. You lift said child by an arm and a leg (same side of the body) and slowly spin around. With practice you can raise and lower the victim while spinning for added excitement. When they cry 😈 you slow the your rotation and gently lay them back on the ground.
With this chappie however, i didn't gently lower him. Instead i spun as fast as i could and released him at the peak rotation and the optimum upward angle to bounce (skim) him on the soaking wet road 3 times before coming to a halt.
Strangely i can't find an image depicting a burlie in action (i thought it was a commonly used term). It's like a cross between the following images.
[img] 
[/img]
I get to punch the wife every weekend (Taekwondo) very satisfying it is
Dear mods, you are cruising for a burlie yourselves for removing my second image 😆
Never.
Lots of road rage stories on here, I've cycled to work every day for years, get cut up etc all the time, but never got into a fight about it.
I must be doing something wrong...
I'm no fighter. I'm ten stone wet through and the reason I've lived to my 40s is because I'm a slippery little shite and I can do a standing 40 yards faster than anyone else I've ever met.
Got into a lot of fights at high school, and certainly not by choice. I was a girlie swot and, in hindsight, Aspie so I guess I was an easy target. Amongst all the background beatings I was systematically bullied by a 'big lad' for about three years.
One day, I was getting the usual lunchtime shoeing from fat boy and something clicked in my head. I had a sudden epiphany of, "I'm not putting up with this shit any more," completely lost my rag and knocked seven bells out of him. After that the fights were considerably less common (and considerably less one-sided as my abject loss of tolerance meant that I'd learned how to go from zero to raging in an instant). My only regret is that I didn't do it three years earlier.
I don't think I've ever thrown a punch since school, other than at a wardrobe door once.
@Northwind - if you couldn't tell from Alex Arthur's nose that he was a boxer, more fool you!! 😆
32 years ago was the last time, and as in the OP case it was at work, during my gap year, and resulted in instant dismissal 🙂 A little twerp had been harassing me all day and towards the end of the day he decided it would be a laugh to push over the job i was shifting across the factory. So I had him pinned up against a pillar one hand around his throat and other one turning his face into mush.
We were both dismissed but he needed the job more than i did and threaten to beat me up 🙂 afterwards though I never saw him again. Even though it was always going to end one way, with the sack, it was really gratifying for so many fellow workers speak in my defense and how I had been provoked.
Strangely i can't find an image depicting a burlie in action (i thought it was a commonly used term). It's like a cross between the following images.
Sounds like a one-man-circular-rather-than-reciprocating-leg-and-a-wing-to-see-the-king.
A couple of weeks ago I was cycling up Regent Street and stopped at the junction with Oxford Street for a red light. A guy in a Smart 4:2 was determined not to stop rolling forward and preceded to hit me at about 1.5mph with his wing mirror as he forced his way past.
I went round to the drivers side and told him to f***ing show some respect (not smart to swear, I know). In response he picked up what looked like a 1.5 kg metal shafted lump hammer from the passenger seat and threatened to stove my head in. At this point I realised he was 100% more mental than I am and rode off as quickly as I could.
A salutory lesson.
Been punched twice.
Threw lots of punches back when the NF were out causing trouble around North London.
2008. Work do in a bar, a bit to early to be packed with folk, but building. One of my colleagues had a rep for getting pissed at home before coming out and then unexpectedly rabbit punching his colleagues, but no one had ever done anything about it. I had a feeling it was my turn and I was right. I got cracked in the kidneys and threw half my pint on the floor.
I've done a few things over the years, so I asked the chaps I was talking to to hold my pint and I turned and gave him a little wing chun style straight line punch to his chest, hard enough to hurt and make him think twice about doing it again.
I caught him wrong footed and the combination of his lack of balance and my little love tap had the effect of knocking him a good 6ft backwards into my peers before he fell. Now with a full audience, I turned back,collected my pint and carried on talking. Everyone burst out laughing and George getting 'tekkened' by me was the best work anecdote for about two years.
I still talk to the odd person who reminisces about it. Funny times and a great place to work.