[Closed] What Do You Do

hardcore revenge

hmmm, do you need a hug?

Oh...

Sorry, didn't think that's what this'd be about. 🙁

Take a step back, have some time to yourself and try and make decisions that are good for you rather than being borne out out fear of change.

Hope things sort themselves out.

yes, i need a hug badly

she was seeing someone else

Option 1 - Pwnage with Bombers
Option 2 - Wee/Shoe interface

Don't spark up no matter what!

Otherwise, what clubber said...however difficult it might seem. It's good advice. Hope things work out.

too late darcy, sorry

listen to lots of depressing music, drink & smoke myself into oblivion, let everyone down around me, run up enormous bills I have little hope of paying, generally fall apart and make a show of myself.

I hope that helps.

emsz - shit, I'm so sorry to hear that. If you want to e-mail etc, I can offer a sympathetic ear.

Don't beat yourself up about smoking this week. We'll crack that another time.

One thing I can guarantee you, any notion of revenge will, long term, not make you feel better.

*hug*

Go out riding with friends

Get out of your house for a while (if you live with her)

Try and do things that maybe you didn't do while with her

Basically, don't mope around as that's just crap.

emsz - Member
too late darcy, sorry

Nooooooooooooo! 🙁

Keep trying emsz.

stiff upper lips and look very ahead...

In the meantime
*/hug/*

charlie and Latvian hookers?

and/or, let them go, cut them off, and set yourself up for it to happen again, but hoping that it won't.

From personal experience it does get better, time is a great healer, you may not believe that at present but it is, and new opportunities do arise. Ride your bike, get super fit, just don't mope about at home.
Revenge feels like a good thing at the time, but won't improve things.
*hug*

Listen to music... tunes that make you happy.
Shed a tear or too.
Ride your bike to the top of a big hill.
Blast down it.

This brings back memories of a 25 yr old me driving down the M40 at 90 mph, welling up whilst trying to sing along to Juicy by Biggie.
It's a cliche but time is a great healer. In the meantime, have a reefer on me.

Just remember that you will be ok in the long run. And you've always got STW to fall back on in times of need or when you need to remind youself that there really are people worse off than you... 😀

more fish an all that.....

It was a drunk one night stand. A party a few weeks before Xmas. Can't believe she'd chuck it all way for a drunk fumble with some random.Never seen her look so scared when the girl started talking to us in the pub on Saturday I knew some thing was up straight away

I hate her. I really ****ing hate her right now. The phones ringing again it'll be her.

Better to have loved and lost than never loved at all.

"a drunk fumble" isn't seeing someone else.
it's a mistake!
fair enough you're pissed tho.

Is there something you like to do but don't do much anymore as she doesn't? Then do that! Mine is scary films as OH gets too scared.

Hmmm. This puts a different spin on things.

I know a lot of people wouldn't. But I'd be prepared to forgive one **** up. Shit happens, it's how people deal with it that matters. How sorry they are. Only you can know whether you can trust her again, or whether you want to.

If you are still young, it is not a long lived relationship, no kids etc then get out now. Once a cheater and all that. Plenty of other potential partners about. But keep it classy, no burning stuff. Then get drunk. And remember it's her problem not yours and don't let it lessen your self worth.

If you are ahem further into your life, have been in the relationship for a while and have dependants well thats a different story and might be worth saving the relationship, have some counselling etc.

Thats what I reckon anyway.

Go out - get slightly tipsy - snog random guy/girl - feel better for myself, but not much...

Try to avoid spending money on things to cheer me up...

Seems to work!!

Rachel

Emsz talk to her, perhaps its worth talking to her, maybe its a good idea to consider both taking a break from booze for a bit as it sounds like hedonism is not a positive element in your relationship?

She's coming down, we need to talk I know. I just legged it Saturday couldn't deal with it all. Its so ****ed up. Why do people do this?

Stupid thing. I made her go to that party. She didn't want to and I told her to go and have fun, y'know that's what uni's all about isn't it? Don't I feel like the ****ing idiot

If I was you, my advice would be to walk away. She's done it once and she will do it again, being drunk is no excuse and it's the only excuse she will probably give you. It'll hurt like hell but you'll get through it. Have you got good friends you could turn to/run away to for a day or two? Miserable situation and to be honest, anyone who cheats IMHO is a scumbag and not worth a seconds thought. I appreciate you must feel awful though 🙁

I'm not sure I agree with the once a cheater always a cheater thing. It's always good to talk it through with the other person. I think you can tell if someone really regrets something.

Then it's up to you to decide if you can forgive and to some extent, over what ever kind of time period, you're going to need to forget as well otherwise it will always be something that hangs between you.

That's a rubbish start to the year though and like others I suggest riding bike, def' not drinking, doing the things that make you feel happy, maybe writing things down so they don't swim around in your head so much.

emsz - Some people can change, some people can't. Only you know if she's a competent liar.

I've experienced both sides. One girl who I suspected it of, who I felt was lieing - she was. Another who made a drunken mistake, and who after a shakey couple of months I know I could always trust 100%. The fear I saw in her eyes at the prospect of having ruined things told me she'd never risk it again.

Hope things work out how you want them to...

Whereabouts are you? Fancy going out for a ride?

This is hardly a surprise, if I’m honest. People at university (if I’m any example, anyway!) are still experimenting, and are often having their first serious relationships. It’s often the case that one party might want to take things a little more seriously than the other; for one person it’s “love of my life” material, for the other it might be “sure I like her, but I don’t see it lasting”. Doesn’t matter on the sexuality, it’s just a basic human condition.

As you get a little older you learn that the “drunken fumble” that we’re probably all guilty of at some time or other just isn’t worth it. And if you’re the person being cheated on you have to decide whether it’s a one-off (which you might decide that you can forgive) or symptomatic of a deeper issue. Maybe she’s decided that you’re just not the right person, or that she’s not really ready for a committed relationship.

Either way, you’ll not be the first person to get their heart broken at university. I just hope it works out OK for you, whichever way it goes.

At University? Well, while she is still with you, you might as well keep shagging her to hone your skills for your future love of life. This is the time to try out all the techniques.

😈

Talk it through then wee in her shoes.

emsz - you alright??