My grandfathers last conversation with me before he passed away always stuck in my mind for many reasons but mainly because he took the opportunity to share his philosophy on life. Knowing that I am someone who is guilty of over thinking and over analysing he pointed out that the future and past don't exist, the future is just a concept and the past is just memory and therefore you should only live in the here and now. You can't change the past so regretting it is futile. Nothing to be gained from regret.
Have just been reminded that one of the things I really regret is lagging at the back of my team when going down a canyon in Switzerland when I should really have been at the front, where I might have spotted the sump under a rock and made sure my teammates avoided it.
Regrets, probably loads of them, my life now has a limited amount of happiness with my wife as she is terminally ill, we now live for now, refuse to focus on past failures and fully focus on bringing up my son in the best way we possibly can until it's left to me, then with inner strength and some great friends I know I should be more than capable of keeping him on the right route so his mother would be proud.
Hmmmmm aaaand that's me ouuutttaaa this thread, shit just got real. Good luck matey. 😕
I regret not being the person I am now when I was younger. I think everyone has this idea in their head of going back and doing things when they were younger with the knowledge and experience they have now. Apart from that, I don't really regret anything. Live and learn..
Not breaking my ex bosses nose properly when I had the golden opportunity to do so,
There's some genuinely heartbreaking stuff on this thread. Some I've yet to face, quite frightening really.
That's me going home to the folks with a bottle of Whisky and a need to talk really quite soon.
Selling my Subaru Impreza i loved that car, being an arrogant prick when i was younger..
1) declining a dutch, ballet-dancing, surfing goddess for an unreliable and bland english girl
2) declining a safe phd with rolls royce for a wildcard phd. I'm 2 years into the wildcard phd and i'm having doubts about whether it was the best choice
3) moving away from grandparents as they're getting old. It's shocking how quickly they have aged in the past 3 years
4) quitting saxophone, i used to be OK
#1 and #2 were big regrets at the time, but I'm happier now for doing so. Plus, I now appreciate what I now have and what may come as a result of those choices.
Regret #3 is still tough and i don't think that will change.
My real regrets.
Not seeing my great-grandmother the last time I had the opportunity. She looked after me a fair bit when I was very small and it would have meant a lot to her...
Not telling my grandparents enough how much they meant to me. Don't get me wrong I was always affectionate and spent a good deal of time with them - but I'm not sure I ever said as an adult that I loved them... I should have said it explicitly.
Saying goodbye to my dad for the last time - I should have stayed longer but we thought he was recovering a bit and his second wife always made things awkward. I should have ignored that and stayed. My last memory of him is him smiling and giving me a thumbs up. I should have been there when he actually died.
Working so hard - so relentlessly that I drove myself into a hole and had a breakdown. No matter how hard I try, I've never been the same person since and my family deserve better.
Finding this bloody forum.
I hate to think how much the hours I've spent on this site have cost me in time, money and jobs.
My little brother is currently in hospital, he is dying from Liver failure, caused by Bowel-cancer.
He probably has a few weeks left at best.
He is 36 years old.
I'm already wishing we'd spent more time together as adults...
You thought you had all the time in the world freeagent. Tell him how you feel and I am sure he will feel the same. There is no shame in this.
It's still hard being the big brother - even when your little brother is in his 30's...
freeagent, would like to say something to help but haven't much to say other than hang in there and keep friends close. My big brother died a few years ago his last words to me were "go steady on that motorbike". I know what he meant was "I love you". Us little brothers know what you mean even if its not said or done. He lived on the other side of the world for 20 years before he died, we didn't spend that much time together, not sure it matters at all.
[i]Probably not saying goodbye to dad. The hospital staff said he was fine, I had a nagging doubt. Walked out waving but feeling odd.[/i]
Yeh been there too. But he looked fine when we left and he was laughing and joking so that was the best way to remember him. Total opposite with my mum though, three days straight watching her slip away. Not sure which is the best way really.
My thoughts are with you freeagent, you'll find the strength when the time comes.
Candodavid and freeagent, my thoughts are with you.
Things happen in life, some of which we cannot comprehend.
Big hugs
bunnyhop xx
Not going to the pub the lunch time of a double A-level exam even if it was £1 a pint, I fell asleep within 20 minutes of the first exam.
The amount I drank in my late teens and early twenties hate to think how much my spell of heavy drinking cost
The amount I spent on gambling during the same period as drinking
Not taking an apprenticeship.
Not going to uni the first time
Going to uni after a drunken night out on a course I didn't want to do.
Not getting a degree.
Taking a lift home one night, rather than going back to hers.
Not going to a club one night and my mate died later than night outside the club, I still think I might have been able to prevent it.
Not visiting my Gran in hospital because they wouldn't let kids on the ward and we didn't have anyone to mind the kids, she didn't leave the hospital alive.
Not going through with the purchase of a run down five bedroom house as job relocation wasn't imminent then two weeks later we were told the office closes on Friday you can either relocate or take redundancy.
The house had come off the market so I took redundancy.
Live in the present and the future.
Yeah I've screwed up decisions but learned from them.
Move on and be happy.
