[Closed] The Burnout Thread - Let's help each other to keep going

What's a holiday...?

A change is as good as a rest in my experience. I had done essentially the same job for a number of years up to about your age, and felt the same way. Changed jobs (but in the same organisation) about 5 years ago and it was like being reborn, learning new stuff again. One advantage of working for a big org should be the ability to switch things up a bit…

The obvious answer to what ails me is some extended time off, and a damn good holiday. Sadly – for all sorts of reasons – my options on both those fronts are quite limited.

I'd think about what's limiting your options to do those things, and work on becoming the boss of your own time rather than fitting in your own stuff around a pointless job for a megacorp.

Yeah, that's me too. Slightly younger and working for a charitable ALEO of a local authority, but essentially feeling the same. One of only 30 employees out of 500+ who've worked throughout since Feb 2020, while others had their paid holiday furlough. Currently managing not just the not insignificant work involved in business recovery from lockdown, but also heaps of shite at work causing significant job insecurity (all due to local political decisions based on absolute pish).

The Scottish term for how I feel is "scunnered".

No particularly wise words other than 'hang in there, you're not alone'. Sounds like you're dong the right things with booze, eating habits and exercise. Biggest things for me have been being able to bike regularly with mates, and being able to see family and friends properly - any retraction of those would hurt me badly...

Glad it's not just me OP.

I'm in a very similar position, actively looking for something to change the pace - spend less time on a screen and more time 'doing', but that's more and more difficult nowadays without going from scratch and learning a trade which wouldn't be possible due to the wage decrease.

is there a reason not to go on holiday? if you're working from home doing a 2 week isolation on return is possible (maybe not if you have kids) - or go away in the UK, or go to iceland.

we've got 2 kids and so stuck to their holiday schedules, but still managed to go away (abroad) 4 times last year and once this year so far.

I feel the same, alas I have no wise words to help beyond you are not alone

abingham

don't underestimate how little it really takes to live on, and how valuable doing something you love is in comparison.

we’ve got 2 kids and so stuck to their holiday schedules, but still managed to go away (abroad) 4 times last year and once this year so far

Times are tough, huh?

Feel the same. Work for mega-corp and want to jack it all in. But just bought a house.

My top things ,not so much to reduce burnout, more to stop getting upset/angry about the world..
I have stopped watching so much news.
Cycling most days
Making/fixing things in my shed of wonder.
Chucking stuff out
Taking photos every day and sometimes staring at things for so long I almost go in to a trance. 🙂

Yep. I'm pretty fried too. 😐

I find making myself work to the time schedule rather than the work schedule helps. Have a task that you do at 6pm so you have to stop at 5:30pm to get ready. It could be a 30 minute ride, a shower, what ever. It provides a mental 'office door' that closes after work.

I quite like art and making stuff so I keep a small journal near my keyboard during the day and jot down ideas when I get them. This forms a 'want to do' list for my spare time to go along with the 'got to do' list that never ends.

Do silly challenges but with short time periods so you get quick rewards or avoid long, drawn out failure. Do 1 press up today, double that, so 2, tomorrow. Keep doubling and see how long you last - I made a week.

I am off the bike at the momemnt but I find just sitting in the garden in the evening listening to bird song, stolen mopeds and helicopters landing at the hospital very relaxing - well, not so much the last two.

is there a reason not to go on holiday?

maybe his wife doesnt work from home ? maybe he doesn't want to expose his family to the risk without reason etc etc

I have stopped watching so much news.
Cycling most days
Making/fixing things in my shed of wonder.
Chucking stuff out
Taking photos every day and sometimes staring at things for so long I almost go in to a trance.

Oh, actual advice! Nice one @fasthaggis. I like all of these. I recently fixed my espresso machine rather than chucking it and buying a new one. Felt very proud.

I know the feeling OP.

I've changed roles and still feel a bit disengaged and basically DGAF a lot of the time. Partly the WFH, partly the role and partly personal circumstances.

Had a full week off in Spring, but I rode my MTB a massive amount and may have overdone it.

Before I changed roles I was basically writing about wellbeing (including burnout) for a living, and I suppose I have absorbed a lot of the advice which suits me (it's not one size fits all)...

- Time in nature
- Contact with friends
- Get organised
- Work out what helps you unwind (I like cooking)
- Sleep well
- Mindfulness or flow activities (I use getting in the zone on the MTB)
- Planning future activities

Yip, here too. Pre pandemic I was out seeing customers on site 2/3 times a week, now I've done about 8 visits this calendar year. Our job has been flipped upside down. And currently coupled with global shortages of raw materials, trying to complete projects to our customers is just impossible at the moment and looks to continue for the coming months. The days are very long at the moment.

I'm trying to find time for my hobbies, but it doesn't come easy.

When I was going through that, I actually found volunteering gave me some space and focus on something else, which helped.

Initially did a bit with Forestry Commission at Hicks Lodge, which was great for being outside and learning new practical skills, but just too far away to get to easily.

Then I got involved on a couple of local Scout committees - no desire to be a regular unit leader but there's loads of background work needs doing to keep things running, and i could use and develop organisational and management skills my job wasn't using, and didn't take up big chunks of time.

Then I got involved in leading beginners cycle rides, great helping others gain fitness and confidence doing something I loved already.

Doing things I enjoyed and made a difference to others in my spare time made the sheer ball ache of work worthwhile.

Just be aware that willing horses get flogged - have got used to turning down requests to get involved in other stuff now, all worthy and interesting but too much fun isn't good for you

Megacorp slave here too. Well paid good company. Megaproject running for the past 18 months. Brain fried in April, felt a *zzzzzap*, the joke of "calling the GP" became a non joke and the only way out. Been off for 3-4 months.

What I Didn't know before is the following:

1. Stress burn out lead to clinical anxiety, e.g. couldn't even look at the laptop (when it was off) without palpations and general fight or flight mode kicking in.
2. 4-6 weeks after getting the sick note I was manically doing DIY. PROPER mania, which I only realized in hindsight.
3. After the initial stress come down, depression hits. This is supposedly quite normal. So now, I avoid most people and conversations, stress out easily but on a path, I hope, to .....return to the megacorp and become a slave again but hopefully never burning out ever again.

Warning signs: sleep impacted, tingling arms / legs, blurred vision, heart palpations etc..

Month four and sure as heck not ready.

I was typing more of my first world sob story, but essentially yes, I'm there too. Redundant, new job, feels like I picked a loser with this job/company, dog is falling apart.

Best thing recently has been daily meditation via the calm app, my wife has been doing it for about 4 years and she's really changed her thought process through it (helped with some anxiety). It's helping me realise there are things I have no control over, such as other people, the dog's health, and it does help stop me calling people <insert faourite bad name> quite as often, but yeah, not all the time.

OP, similar time of life to you and in a reasonably well paid job working from home that involves plenty of pointlessness. It is a first world problem but you are still allowed to feel crap.

Try shrinking work as a feature of your life as much as possible. Keep regular hours and try to catch yourself thinking about work when you're not there (many of us do this and it's a waste of our time and attention).

Then expand your non working time. Take a proper lunch break, get some fresh air. Arrange to do things early morning and in the evenings if you can, as well as weekends. Exercise, catch up with people.. or just quality doing nothing time, and not feeling guilty about it.

Don't for one minute think everything is tickety boo when the mortgage is paid with cash in the bank and you've retired to a stones throw from a beach with great trails at the back of the house, life is still shit.

Most years I am apathetic to the appraisal system and would rather be poking my eye with a ruler.

This year I'm going to town on it, itemizing every complaint and what I expect then to do about it.

But wait the bastarding form has been changed and my rant has no place. Its all reflective and really personal. That shit's no good to me.

we’ve got 2 kids and so stuck to their holiday schedules, but still managed to go away (abroad) 4 times last year and once this year so far.

4 foreign holidays last year? Trying to help with the herd immunity strategy eh?

Probably means 2019.

We're still in 2020 really, aren't we?

I am incredibly fortunate that my job is basically stress and pressure free. I was recently offered an interview for a job on more than twice what I'm on now, it would have meant a good £1500 p/m more take home, and I turned it down on the basis there are, assuming you can meet your current living costs, more important things than money.

I love my job, has a boss who gives a shit and have no intention of moving on for any amount until / unless I have to which hopefully won't be for a few years year.

I've worked for the big corporates and ground myself right down to the point of serious physical and mental illness and I ain't doing it again....

This year I’m going to town on it, itemizing every complaint and what I expect then to do about it.

Careful now. I did that once . Got promoted.

We’re still in 2020 really, aren’t we?

I have wasted time on several occasions just this week trying to fix "this year" type problems by working with 2020 dates rather than 2021 dates.

🤦🏻‍♂️

Just realised that no-one has mentioned crack whores and cocaine. Up your consumption of both immediately.

I've had this earworm for the past hour... enjoy...

Fried here as well.  Lucky enough to have paid off house so aiming to go down to 2days/week by Sept.  Too many of my colleagues have burned out and ended up on long term sickness.  Trying to get ahead of the game while I can still think straight

Why do stolen mopeds land at the hospital?

The GF is feeling it. A well paid, but pointless job creating PowerPoint presentations for large corps like Siemens and Porsche. A boss that doesn't treat her employees like humans, but rather worker bees.

On top of that, stresses of living in town, dealing with neighbours/people and not having enough time to do the things that are important.

We bought a Ducato last week and will start converting it. Once that's finished we're jacking it in here (jobs, flat, sell the contents, etc) and going exploring. Go and discover how and where we want to grow old before we're too old and caught up again with modern life.

A few years back I was manically depressed. Figured it out for myself without resorting to prescribed drugs. It involved lots of f-offski away on my own, either several days away in the van or simply a long, lonely walk.

I don't think humans are geared up for modern life.

The idea of paring my life back to the minimum of what I need gets more and more attractive the older I get.

I thought this thread was about Fast and Furious 9???

For some reason my reply earlier didn't take, anyone else seeing that? I click submit, the button greys out, and nothing happens. Here is what I meant to say about three hours ago:

49 years young, also working for a megacorp. Very much customer facing so I'm used to travelling a lot and socialising so the last 16 months or so have been tough. I tend to go in peaks and troughs, as time goes by the troughs are getting a little deeper.

The difficulty for me is recognising I'm in one of those troughs - about 6 weeks ago I felt completely out of sorts, couldn't focus on work, struggling for motivation to exercise, snappy with the family. Every day feels like groundhog day - get up, make the kids packed lunch, have breakfast, start work, have lunch, walk dogs, work some more, take kids to clubs, have dinner, go to bed. Find time to exercise in there somewhere. Rinse and repeat.

After about two weeks I realised I was in another trough of despair, feeling sorry for myself. Once I'd recognised it I could deal with it and drag myself out of it. Generally this involved things like getting away from the desk as much as possible - I'm fortunate that my job involves a lot of talking to people so I'll take the dogs on a 2-3 hour walk through the forest and just call people while I walk. Instead of trying to find time to exercise I block out time from work, sometimes taking a whole morning and riding 100km on the road, or go to the lake/pool for a long swim. I've never been one for talking on the phone with friends/family (work is easy) but I am spending a fair bit of time ringing round mates.

I'm lucky that work understands and is comfortable with me taking the p!ss on occasion as they know I'm reliable and that they need to help me stay sane. Mental wellbeing is a huge thing in megacorps these days, and they are terrified of getting it wrong. I'm not saying abuse it, but definitely use it - there is no stigma to being vulnerable these days, something I think our generation still struggle to understand sometimes.

In summary - recognise it for what it is, a shit sandwich. Once you accept that you can figure out how to deal with it rather than moping and feeling sorry for yourself. That's my approach anyway!

Chin up, ride your bike.

So, what are your top tips and tricks for keeping going?

Get out and enjoy life outdoors, walking, biking socially etc.

Biggest big tip from me is eat healthily and do physio exercises to keep your muscles and joints in condition. Don’t get injured. Don’t ‘be a man’ and lift heavy stuff on your own.

I’ve had to endure decades now of recurring injury for not following the above advice. Have also watched friends turn from lean happy go for it characters to crutch-bound overweight depressives with knackered backs/vertebrae/shoulders/knees/hernias etc etc

Body Conditioning? Do it.

Lifting the heavy stuff (‘proving to self can still do it’)? Don’t do it.

Getting out and away from internet, visiting, exercising, doing new things? As much as possible.

Learning/achieving new things/skills/leaving comfort zone? Do it

Overthinking old things/regrets/‘if only’? Do as little as is useful and then halve it.

Maybe a full on holiday isn’t possible, but how about a long weekend unplugged? Go camping, don’t have an electric hookup, don’t charge your phone, leave watches at home (everyone on the trip should do the same). Swim in the sea, read a book, nap a lot. Properly switched off and losing track of time and the news, just spending a few days living by the rhythm of the daylight and demands of your stomach, might just give you the refresh and energy to put some of the other suggestions here in place, but equally might not be so much time away that it adds pressure in preparing for being off and then catching up again after.

It’s interesting and sad reading seeing how many are struggling. I guess if you work for a mega corp you can get some sort of pay if you are signed off with stress or burn out, its not so easy if you are self employed running your own business trying to keep it going during the pandemic, time off means an end to the business and all that entails meaning it would just add to the troubles as you would be left with no income and debt in some cases. Tbh I feel for everyone who struggles, more riding out in nature is the best thing I find but it isn’t the complete answer

we’ve got 2 kids and so stuck to their holiday schedules, but still managed to go away (abroad) 4 times last year and once this year so far.

There’s a ****ing global pandemic you selfish dipstick. What part of stay home didn’t you get?

You’re right up there with bloody Rita Ora, you are. Another bloody “I’m alright, jack”.

Careful now. I did that once . Got promoted.

I can't get promoted because I don't have a degree. So what happens is I mentor the graduates teach them how to do my job then they go off and climb the ladder. And in between do really menial tasks because there isn't actually anyone with enough experience to do things.

Loads of great advice. I’m going to clutch at these ones over the next few weeks…

Have a task that you do at 6pm so you have to stop at 5:30pm to get ready. It could be a 30 minute ride, a shower, what ever. It provides a mental ‘office door’ that closes after work.

just sitting in the garden in the evening listening to bird song

Take a proper lunch break, get some fresh air. Arrange to do things early morning and in the evenings if you can, as well as weekends. Exercise, catch up with people.. or just quality doing nothing time, and not feeling guilty about it.

Getting out and away from internet, visiting, exercising, doing new things? As much as possible.

but how about a long weekend unplugged?

All things I was good at last summer, and helped, but have completely failed to do this summer.

All very familiar here, I've seen a few articles lately like this one about a general lack of focus and motivation.

Have been very lucky to have work flexible enough to let me deal with the kids, but it's meant a lot of the time feeling like I'm barely treading water to do enough work. Although kids are back at school/nursery there's no good after school options so it's still a chunk out of my day between leaving to pick them up and my wife finishing work, maybe with a bit of juggling things with her if there's a meeting I have to do. Always chuckle at the "end your work day on time" advice, at 5:30 I'm heading back upstairs to catch up on the stuff I'd not been doing in the afternoon. Always feeling behind, like I've not put in enough hours, isn't really helping things to be honest.

Had a couple of days away, without the kids, by the sea and it was great. Back to the grind and my brain has slowed to a crawl again.

I imagine many others here are in the same boat. So, what are your top tips and tricks for keeping going? How have you managed burnout while continuing to work? How have you reclaimed your concentration/focus?

If I don't work I sleep on the street as my zero hour contract can only maintain my survival for so long.

I have to take shite all day and still perform emotional labour by saying thank you kindly to those above me.

How to avoid burnout? Try not to have tossers as colleagues.

How to reclaimed concentration? Rest whenever I can. Sleep whenever I can. Eat whenever I can. When the only way to survive is to break even then you will try however you can to maintain that and ensure ...

I can drink half a litre of coffee and also a cup or two of tea a day and still sleep like a log as I am tired.

staring at things for so long I almost go in to a trance. 🙂

Read this and the "thing" that springs to mind is the work laptop. I am also fried. Taken from an active role to a desk role against my will in Feb last year just before all this kicked off. I'm fried. Just started back after a lengthy sign off from the doctor. One full day of the laptop trap and I'm today, stuck in bed with pain in my right shoulder like I've never known. I'm just not built for desk work.