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Control your kids? Anyway, they’ll only do it once. Either you’ll give them a thick ear or common sense will kick in.
Unsure if I'm being trolled here or if you're actually serious... sincerely hope the former!
Poe's Law does make things difficult sometimes.
The obnoxious tw*t who, without fail, walks into the (quite small) work gym, and without ever asking, proceeds to set the other radio at the cardio end of the gym to (a) capital dance and (b) maximum volume. This is when one, two or many of us are already quite happily listening to literally anything else, on the first radio in the weights end, which we can no longer do because yours has drowned it out. Dick.
Then he walks into the half I’m/we’re in and uses the weights for half an hour. Dick.
Time for some not-so-subtle passive-aggressive radio wars!
Turn yours also all the way up.
Saunter over and turn his down again.
Start shouting to each other as if you can't hear each other talk over the radio.
Start a synchronised dance routine to his music.
Hide the other radio before he comes in.
etc 😉
My rant was about people not answering phones in general. I got triggered by the pharmacy to kick off with and went ballistic due to additional issues involving doctors and prescriptions etc. I was disproportionately cross though ?.
I have now been watching Celebrity Hunted and am "Disproportionately Cross" again.
Time for some not-so-subtle passive-aggressive radio wars!
Unplug the radio.
Cable-crop the plug off the end.
Bask in the adulation of your fellow gym bunnies.
Say nothing.
https://www.screwfix.com/p/magnusson-vde-cable-cutters-6-1-4-160mm-/7434x
ScotRail safety announcement. "Sort it, See it, Say it, Sort it." It makes me disproportionately cross.
*edit
ScotRail safety announcement. "Sort it, See it, Say it, Sort it." It makes me disproportionately cross.
Whatever the last Android update did that seems to have made it really difficult to flick up from the lock screen to the pattern unlock screen.
Used to be a casual flick up from the bottom and then my pattern screen. Now it seems to take me 6 or 7 unsuccessful flicks of varying styles, never pinning down the flick technique required.
This is what fingerprint readers and facial recognition are for.
This is what fingerprint readers and facial recognition are for.
My fingers are normally sanded down, covered in paint or oil etc. very often doesn't work for me, and I have a possibly irrational distrust of facial recognition. 🙂
Morrison’s card only self checkout machines. With a big sign above them saying card only.
Tesco Cheetham Hill's self checkout machines, a mix of cash and card only.
On the left: 5 machines, 4 of them with a big sign and arrow "card only". You'd think the one without the sign accepts cash, but no, it's card only, the cash one is the one at the end with the big "card only" sign. I guess they cba to move the signs because they're attached to the ceiling but it's been like that for years, I've pointed it out a couple of times and had responses varying from complete bewilderment to grumpy annoyance.
On the right: all meant to be cash machines, but only about half of them work for cash and the rest are "temporarily" (until they fix them, ie never) card only.
There's always a queue waiting to use cash, with a bunch of empty machines...
When you scan an item, it flashes and beeps. Oh but on some (many) the sound is broken meaning it just flashes. Turns out it flashes when an item goes in front of the scanner but beeps when it actually scans the code, meaning you 'scan' something, it flashes so you stick it on the scales, then it moans at you cos it never actually scanned properly, so what you actually have to do for every single thing is scan it, stand there holding it until it shows on screen so you know it actually worked, THEN put it down. Making the whole process 10 times slower.
please select payment type
BUT YOUR CARD ONLY WHYYYYYYYY¿???
Ha, yes, then there's those where you select "contactless payment" and it chirps "please insert your card!"
Idiot machine.
It was mildly misty on the M1 this morning so of course there's people with their rear fog lights on. Not quite as special as the folk sat in traffic in Milton Keynes with the rear fog light blazing away. Idiots.
"Tubeless Tyre suddenly started loosing pressure"
I am losing the will to live this morning.
It was mildly misty on the M1 this morning so of course there’s people with their rear fog lights on.
... for the next three months. Fog lights really should auto-cancel when you turn off the ignition.
Self checkout machines that give you so many coins change back, 1ps 2ps and 5ps rather than a 50 and a couple of 20s
Warms my bladder up big time
It was mildly misty on the M1 this morning so of course there’s people with their rear fog lights on. Not quite as special as the folk sat in traffic in Milton Keynes with the rear fog light blazing away. Idiots.
This and the number of grey cars relying on auto lights, in the mist/fog, also seem prone to not indicating when changing lanes and seem utterly surprised when a commercial vehicle doesn’t spot their stealthy ways in mirrors that are constantly shitting up with road grime. Maybe they should be made to wear a hi viz.
Self checkout machines that give you so many coins change back, 1ps 2ps and 5ps rather than a 50 and a couple of 20s
Warms my bladder up big time
Oh yes, what fun. One gave me back 20-something pence all in 2p coins just the other day. Felt like kicking the thing!
This and the number of grey cars relying on auto lights, in the mist/fog, also seem prone to not indicating when changing lanes and seem utterly surprised when a commercial vehicle doesn’t spot their stealthy ways in mirrors that are constantly shitting up with road grime. Maybe they should be made to wear a hi viz.
Don't even get me started about drivers and their light usage. Some people switch their fog lights on at the slightest hint of mist, others won't switch any lights on at all in a howling snowstorm at dusk.
It's like some people's minds go: "Lights are for dark, ie nighttime" or "Fog lights are for fog" and they don't do any critical thinking at all. Or any type of thinking.
Edit:
Now I've annoyed myself, puzzling over the apostrophe in "some people's minds". My mind is going round and round:
People is plural but the minds belong to them so it's possessive, so is it people's or peoples'? Minds is plural but each person only has one mind so is the possessive going on each mind or minds all together? Do I need an apostrophe there? Would it be mind's or minds'? Either way it looks stupid with the apostrophe after the S but surely that should be right because it is both possessive and plural at the end of the day. Do both words get one? In the same place or different? Aaargh
It's far too late. I think I got it right and don't care any more. I'm going to bed.
People is plural but the minds belong to them so it’s possessive, so is it people’s or peoples’?
Plural nouns that don’t end in ‘s’ you add an apostrophe and ‘s’ so "people's" is correct.
Plural nouns that do end in 's' you add the apostrophe after the 's', such as "The committees' report on stuff that makes them cross"
In this case the minds aren't possessing anything, so no apostrophe needed.
While we’re on the subject of car lights, people sat with their foot on the brake for extended periods at traffic lights at nighttime. I can’t remember the last time I pulled up behind someone and they engaged the **** handbrake FFS. It’s not hard.
Self checkout machines that give you so many coins change back, 1ps 2ps and 5ps rather than a 50 and a couple of 20s
On the other hand, in a local bakery in Pays de Frog there is a machine that accepts any amount of small coins, and since I can't keep track of the small change I receive in France it's a useful way to clear out my pockets and get a tasty treat in exchange.
Maybe "cross" isn't the right word, but I get disproportionately confused by people posting on our towns facebook page asking for recommendations for a tattooist. Surely if you are getting something permanently drawn on your body, you'd want to find the best person in the country, or even world, rather than the best person in the tiny market town you happen to live in.
Surely if you are getting something permanently drawn on your body, you’d want to find the best person in the country, or even world, rather than the best person in the tiny market town you happen to live in.
Judging by some of the results, that ain't the case 🙂
Talky trains - in Scotland they never shut up. Sirius Cybernetics Corporation?
Road signs in bike lanes and on the pavement. Yeah, no problem, I'll jump in front of the moving traffic so you can put a sign up for the motorists to ignore or that is totally unnecessary if drivers were just a tiny bit observant.
you can put a sign up for the motorists to ignore or that is totally unnecessary
I passed a road sign the other day proclaiming "Lighting not in use".
What am I supposed to do with this information? Am I going to be driving past at night wondering why it's dark and requiring a sign to tell me it's dark because there are no lights? Or that if I'm planning a midnight picnic on the roundabout under J8 of the M65 I'll need to pack a head torch?
The fact that someone has paid actual money to commission and construct a sign telling you that the lights are off makes me disproportionately cross, not least because if it was genuinely required then you wouldn't be able to see the f'kn thing anyway.
Cougar, you need one of these:
ScotRail
Scotfail surely??
Road signs in bike lanes and on the pavement. Yeah, no problem, I’ll jump in front of the moving traffic so you can put a sign up for the motorists to ignore or that is totally unnecessary if drivers were just a tiny bit observant.
Could only be better if it had a ‘Cyclists must dismount’ sign. Yeah I’ll do that as doon as you start putting up ‘Drivers must get about and push’ signs.
Oh and auto correct. Doon? Really?
Road signs in bike lanes and on the pavement.
Nothing stopping you from moving them a metre to the right...
Flicking round the channels and caught the end of Travel Man: 48 hours in Rotterdam.
There were a number of reasons to be disproportionately cross about it, but at the end of the credits it said "Filmed in Rotterdam".
Where else would you film a ****ing travel show about Rotterdam? A clever array of green screens?
Nothing stopping you from moving them a metre to the right…
I made a complaint to our road department here about this. They're always putting signs on the edge of roads. I got told they don't have a choice because the rules are that they have to be within x of the carriageway (presumably for visibility). It rather pissed me off.
A few years ago there were a couple of different stretches of roadworks done, on the same road (A56/Bury New Rd) but in 2 different council areas, Bury and Salford.
It was remarkable how they differed in the signage for cyclists...
Here's Bury, a fairly large area of works with narrow lanes and 4-way temporary lights, where you might expect them to want cyclists well out of the way:
And here's Salford, about 10 metres of the cycle lane was closed. As you can see from the image it makes almost zero difference, and yet:
Salford made me cross and I don't think it was disproportionate, either. Thank you Bury Council!
I have a possibly irrational distrust of facial recognition
Me too. On my twentieth can of White Lightning it could be used against me 😉
Thank you Bury Council!
Not really, they don't want cyclists to be overtaking, but you can be overtaken 😉
Those horrible, muddy, boggy, swampy sections on a walk where people have chucked a load of sticks in as if it'll help.
Nah man. Just means you can get covered in mud AND break your ankle.
Last minute gig cancellations.
Northern Powergrid. I'm convinced that the person I'm dealing with hates heat pumps as they're doing absolutely everything they can to make it difficult. Took three months and my MP's involvement to get a fuse upgrade from 60A to 80A for a car charger, and now they're kicking back for the heat pump approval on every single minor technicality they can find.
Need a letter of authorisation to provide details to Octopus, which they said in their email can be "sent by email". Turns out that no, it can't. Then the site plan is the wrong scale. Then it can't be in black and white.
The heat pump surveyor is of the opinion that because of the amount of work Octopus is forcing them to do, they're retaliating by making it as difficult as possible.
I passed a road sign the other day proclaiming “Lighting not in use”.
What am I supposed to do with this information?
I often get disproportionately cross when I drive past my local golf club and see this sign
What am I meant to do with that information, get ready to swerve to avoid a tiny white ball moving at 100mph?
Going back to my favourite moan, Scotrail.
If I book a return ticket using the Scotrail app, and I chose the exact journey times, it shouldn't sell me an off-peak ticket if the ticket dude on the platform is then going to tell me it is invalid and I need a peak ticket. I was in a rush, more than slightly drunk, and I had to pay an extra £4 for the journey. I don't mind paying for a peak journey, I do mind the app selling me the wrong tickets even when I select that exact journey.
Had to pop to the supermarket and thought while I was there I would pick up a pack of "luxury" hot cross buns with cheese for lunch.
Forgot that it is now "Easter" for the supermarkets. I could have had any number of flavoured hot cross buns - apple and cinnamon, chocolate, salted caramel, blueberry, St Clements, chilli and cheese. Not a single normal fruity hot cross buns to be had.
Water soluble Reverb circlips.
Taking the hound for a walk this afternoon, he decided to go up the back lane between our street and the next. Looks like Northumbrian Water have been out reading external water meters. To say I'm somewhat irked, is an understatement
The fact you can't get your ears gently rinsed out by the local surgery nurse
It used to be great to hold the beaker below the lug and 2 mins later you could hear a sparrow farting 15' away from you
Now it a lottery do I go to spec savers and come out with new glasses but still struggling to hear or one of these new pop up hoover your ear out shops anything from £40-£100
Double sided tape/pads, sticking it to the first surface then spending 10 minutes trying o pick at a corner to get the backing tape off without lifting it away from that surface so you can actually use it as intended.
ossify
Full MemberAnd here’s Salford, about 10 metres of the cycle lane was closed. As you can see from the image it makes almost zero difference, and yet:
They put one of those up on my commute, it got mysteriously yeeted into a field, they put it back, it inexplicably returned to the field. Must have been aliens or something.
Just bloody terrible though, to have people planning these things and apparently never once thinking "bicycles are allowed on roads"
That I spell so badly that I have to google "unnecessary" because the built in browser spell checker doesn't recognise the word (I used in a post on the disproportionately happy thread)
If you’re going out to a ski resort this season, learn the flippin’ rules of the piste. It’s not hard and it may save someone from ruining their life for the next year.
Stand to the side if stopping, don’t stop below a drop, look before setting off, don’t close pass, give the downhill piste user right of way, when it says ‘slow’ don’t career past the sign showing off with a hockey stop, read the terrain a head .
To say I’m somewhat irked, is an understatement
Cougar is twitching already and he hasn't even seen the pic yet!
I'm not sure exactly which thread that should be in, quite possibly both.
Buying something online and immediately getting 12 emails: an invoice from the vendor, an order confirmation from the vendor, a welcome email from the vendor, an email from the vendor requesting feedback, a receipt from PayPal, an invoice from PayPal, an email from PayPal requesting feedback, an email from InPost...
...and then 12 emails at each stage: the package is dropped off, the package is in the Northampton sorting centre, the package has been accidentally sent to Liebniz, the package is back in Northampton, the package is out for delivery, the driver is late and the package is delayed from 1458 to 1504, the package is back on track and will be delivered at 1433, the package has been delivered, here is a photo of your package stuffed in your recycling bin, how did we do delivering your package...?
FFS, it's a fleece off Vinted, not a kidney!
Eating out on your own and always being given the crappiest table even if the restaurant is quiet. Ok i dont need the prime 4 top but ffs when you have 10 tables free why give me the one in the corner beside the toilets
FFS, it’s a fleece off Vinted, not a kidney!
Brilliantly worded post, but not sure that's disproportionate. Belongs on a " things that just ****ing annoying" thread
a)
close the browser and retry
b)
This forum's auto embedded of "all things that look like website links". Seriously, just switch it off, or turn the address into a link. I didn't want a miniature, non-functional copy of the other website inserted into my post.
The fact you can’t get your ears gently rinsed out by the local surgery nurse
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Otex-3453305-Express-Combi-Pack/dp/B002FAHBKA
Knock yourself out, etc.
when you have 10 tables free why give me the one in the corner beside the toilets
But it's a good opportunity to bark at each patron that comes out "show me your hands, please!", like a nursery nurse making sure the kids aren't being grubby
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Otex-3453305-Express-Combi-Pack/dp/B002FAHBKA < Knock yourself out, etc.
What could possibly go wrong? I said WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG???
That I spell so badly that I have to google “unnecessary” because the built in browser spell checker doesn’t recognise the word (I used in a post on the disproportionately happy thread)
I have the same issue with maintenence / maintainance / maintinence / maintenance.
For a while at school I was sent to the lunchtime spelling classes (basically an open invitation for everyone else to bully you). They were completely unhelpful but the one thing that did stick was how to spell necessary.
Never Eat Cakes East Some Salad And Remain Young.
So if you remember this, and stick UN at the front you will be grand!
I use unneeded instead because I can spell that
This forum’s auto embedded of “all things that look like website links”. Seriously, just switch it off, or turn the address into a link. I didn’t want a miniature, non-functional copy of the other website inserted into my post.
Paste it as a link using the 'link' button and it doesn't do that.
Our coffee machine
it makes nice coffee. It comes with a scoop to measure the coffee so you get a nice non compacted level measure and put it into the filter, press it down and it exceeds the max fill mark. Why? Is it really too much to expect the supplied measure scoop to fit in the filter. Clearly it is but ……
Call to cancel Barclaycard Customer Serviced as I lost my wallet out riding... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",... "just key in the sixteen digit card number"... "I can't I've lost my card and am in a foreign country",...
Sounds like you need some help
a scoop to measure the coffee
I'm disproportionately cross about always having to use a very much heaped scoopful to make an acceptably strong coffee, instead of a level scoopful.
The chap who sat in his car outside my house at 5.45am today with his engine running and music blaring made me cross. I don't think he expected a wild haired man who had obviously just woken up to knock on his car window. Fair play, he stopped being inconsiderate immediately when I politely asked him to be quiet.
My racist dog.
Just immediately has a problem with certain breeds for literally no reason.
My racist dog.
Just immediately has a problem with certain breeds for literally no reason.
Maybe he does have a good reason. How do you know?
Maybe he does have a good reason. How do you know?
Oh he has a reason. It's called prejudice 🙂
My arms are open to the Labradoodle as they are to the Pointer.
At least until it is confirmed that individually, they are dicks too.
NIN playing the O2 in London FFS!
The Boots website lets you check stock in local stores, and while it does have a small disclaimer that prices may vary, I hadn't expected that having committed my lunchbreak to picking something up from the next town over, it would be £20 more expensive...
The chap who sat in his car outside my house at 5.45am today with his engine running and music blaring made me cross.
I appreciate that taste is subjective, but the people who do this, it's always really shit music. I'd mind less if it was something half decent.
Ice cold toilet seats.
Ok, time for a dump *stifles a scream*
Corollary: warm toilet seats. Why are they unnaturally warm? Argh!
Surely a warm seat means someone else's bottom has been perched on it very recently.
So today is recycling day where I live + there's a well publicised storm sweeping across the country, the result is like some post-apocalyptic scene with rubbish everywhere and recycling boxes and bags all over the roads. Idiots. You can't just wait one week? I wish the council would announce they aren't doing a collection that day in advance or something.
For a while at school I was sent to the lunchtime spelling classes
In fairness, in your example you then misspelled eat so seems like they had a valid point 😉
I wish the council would announce they aren’t doing a collection that day in advance or something.
Stirling council did announce it yesterday, and asked for no bins out.
I, and most of the neighbours, have moved bins into sheltered spots for today. Clearly not everyone as I've just heard a thunk think of a couple of bins blowing over while I popped out with the recycling...
Booking flights.
I'm no longer a regular flyer so I'm out of practice, but when I do need to fly (and take my bike)...OMG, what a palaver.
I'm currently being bounced between two different code share airlines customer service departments to add my bike to ALL the flights...it seems that the main air line (Swiss Air) think I want to fly my bike across the Atlantic and then leave it at the first airport when I get on the connecting flight....idiots!
Premier Inns. If I have to stay in one, I always seem to get a room that’s a Wetherspoons toilet distance away from reception, next to an over enthusiastic door closer.
Then the key card doesn’t work…